At the End of the Tunnel
by Trapped in a MatchBox
Summary: AU: Kate is going through a bad divorce. After a big fight one day, she decides to go for a run to sort out her emotions, having no idea who she was about to stumble upon.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: You guys know how I'm all about externalizing my feelings and emotions through writing. Someone really close to me is going through this exact same situation Kate is in this story and I wish so bad I could help her. It's killing me that I can't do anything about it, but support her and be there for her. So this is my way of giving her a happy ending. This story will most likely be 10-12 chapters long and I hope you guys like it.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

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><p><strong>At the End of the Tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 1<strong>

"Kate, come back here. I'm not done with you."

His voice now made her skin crawl. She shook him off when he grabbed her arm to prevent her from walking towards the door. It was too much. She couldn't take this anymore. It had become entirely too hard to live under the same roof with this man and just being in close proximity made it hard for her to breathe. It hurt. It hurt so badly now that she knew everything he had done behind her back and only had the guts to tell her when she pressured him to come clean. In a way, she wished she hadn't.

They were right; ignorance was bliss.

It was sadly funny that this was someone she had loved so much once, the father of her two beautiful children. They were her strength now and she had only had the energy to fight for this marriage for as long as she had because of them. If she hadn't become a mother, she would have walked out the door long ago. Jake grabbed her arm again, pulled her back to him and she struggled to break free.

"_Let go of me_." She pushed him away and grabbed her keys and duffel bag from the closet near the door. "I'm done here." She said quietly, a knot forming in her throat, making it hard to breathe. She would not cry here. Refused to cry in front of him; refused to give him the satisfaction of seeing how much she was hurting.

She had married Jake Caldwell nine years ago. They had been so blissfully happy then, so in love. When she found out she was pregnant with Olivia, he had promptly made an honest woman out of her and their wedding had been small, intimate, but beautiful. When her baby girl was born, she thought she would get a chance of having a happy ending, after all, even if her mom wasn't around anymore to see it.

She thought she was finally starting to heal.

How innocent and gullible she had been back then, she mused with a shake of her head as she made her way down the stairs, two steps at a time. She needed to put some distance between herself and him, their apartment, their life together that for so long she had thought was perfect. Youngest woman to make Detective in the NYPD and the hot shot district attorney. They made such a beautiful couple, such a beautiful family with their children. It had all been an act, though. All for show.

Stupid. She had been so incredibly stupid all these years, working herself into the ground, trying to be a mom and super detective at the same time and still be a good, dutiful wife. God, she felt pathetic. She would always be grateful for her children, they were the light of her life, but she could have done without all this heartache.

Opening the door of her building, she hit the sidewalk and started running at a steady pace towards Central Park. Checking her watch, she made a mental note that she had to pick up her kids from school in about an hour and a half. An hour and a half to run this swirl of emotion out of her system so she could look presentable to her babies. She didn't think Alex would notice anything, but Olivia would. She had been quieter and withdrawn these past few weeks and Kate saw her watching her and Jake have at it one night, hiding in the corridor that led to the bedrooms in their apartment. It hurt her even worse that her little girl was obviously being affected by this and she knew it would most likely get worse before it got better. But the only solution right now was to end this godforsaken relationship once and for all so they could all move on with their lives.

Kate crossed the east entrance to Central Park and allowed the somewhat fresh air fill her lungs. It was late March and the freezing temperatures that had plagued New York during the winter had finally relented, giving way to a sunny spring that made the trees around her a lot more colorful. It was a Wednesday and she was thankfully just on call. She thought maybe she could take the kids to get ice cream after school today, cheer them up. Alex would love it, she thought with a smile, a memory of her lively 4-year old boy's happy face, completely smeared with ice cream the last time they had done this a week before. He looked so much like her it was impossible to say he was not her son. He was almost like her little clone, her friend Lanie always said. Olivia was a mix of her and Jake with her long light brown hair and those impossibly gorgeous blue eyes that were always smiling and eager to tell a story.

They were so sad and concerned these days, Kate thought with a sigh. Her teacher had called her for a meeting and said that Olivia was unusually distracted during class and lashing out at her classmates sometimes. Kate tried to keep everything as normal as she could, distract her as much as possible, but she knew this would have an impact on her daughter.

It broke her heart that her kids wouldn't grow up with a loving family around them like she had. She had always dreamed of having the kind of love her parents had found in each other and, for a while, she thought Jake was it, but not anymore. Her vision blurred and she wiped away the tears that escaped her eyes unbidden angrily. She would not cry. He did not deserve any tears being shed over this. Another fresh wave fell freely down her cheeks and she had to stop and sit down to try and get her stupid emotions under control.

Sitting at a bench, she took a deep, shaky breath and brushed her stubborn tears away. She needed to pull herself together if she was going to face Alex and Olivia soon. She also needed to start thinking about looking for an apartment so they could move out. They lived in Jake's apartment and he absolutely refused to be the one to leave. Said that she was the one who wanted to get divorced so she was the one leaving; he would not move a finger.

_Bastard._

Another lone tear made its way down her cheek and she once again brushed it away angrily. Crying by herself in the middle of Central Park was not going to solve her problems.

"Hey, you okay?" She heard someone ask and involuntarily looked up. Bright blue eyes were looking down at her with concern and she felt herself blush.

"Yeah, it's…" She ran her hand through her hair, brushed the back of it against her eyes again. "I'm fine. Thanks." Kate looked away and let out a sigh when the man sat down next to her.

"You don't look fine." He said softly and she looked up at him again, met his eyes and something finally clicked in her mind. _God, she knew he looked familiar_. "I don't mean to intrude and you can tell me to mind my own business. I just… I couldn't just walk by when you were crying all by yourself here."

"Just going through a tough time, that's all." She tried to smile at him, but it probably came out like a grimace. Out of millions of people in New York, she had to run into him. Jake had never understood why she loved his books so much. Called her immature when she stood in line for hours just to get his autograph a couple of years back.

"Can I help with anything?" He leaned back and she mimicked his action, letting out a humorless laugh.

"I don't think so, but thanks." She sighed and checked her watch. Alex and Olivia wouldn't be out for another forty minutes.

"You sure?" He cocked his head to the side, his concerned eyes meeting hers.

"Just… going through a bad divorce process." She found herself spilling out and almost wanted to pick up her words and put them back in. He smiled sympathetically at her and nodded.

"I know how those go. Been there twice already." He showed her two fingers and she bit her lip, nodding. "Not a fun experience."

"You can say that again." She chuckled quietly and he nodded. They were silent for a moment.

"You got kids?" He asked curiously and she nodded, the cop in her screaming at herself to stop giving out information about her life. But this was her favorite author sitting next to her, concerned that she was crying over the end of her marriage. It didn't even feel real.

"A boy and a girl." She smiled when he did. Talking about her children always made her feel better, happier. They really were the center of her universe.

"I only have a girl. Teenager. Making me age before my time." He joked and she let a laugh escape. She knew all of that, of course. She was a fan. "No, I'm kidding. She's a great kid, my Alexis. So not like me or her mother when we were at that age."

"I still have a few years to go before I have to worry about that." She offered and he looked back at her, his eyes sparkling with his smile.

"Yeah? How old are they?"

"Olivia is eight and Alex is four years old." She told him and shook her head. "It's going by so fast." She mused and he nodded.

"Before you know it, you'll have two teenagers in your hands." He grinned at her and she closed her eyes.

"God, don't remind me. They are already a handful right now. Especially Alex. You'd think he was running on sugar the entire time, the amount of energy that kid has." She laughed and looked at him again, a soft smile playing on her lips. "Thanks." She said after a moment.

"For what?"

"Taking my mind off of things for a little while." She explained. "I needed that."

"Hey, it's no problem. I've been where you are now. I know how hard this is…" He gave her a small smile and looked at her sheepishly. "I didn't catch your name."

"Kate." She grinned slightly and offered a hand to him. "Kate Beckett." She said when he shook her hand firmly.

"Rick Castle." He told her and she nodded, biting her lip again, deciding not to go into how she absolutely adored his books. "Nice to meet you, Kate. Can I call you Kate?" He added quickly and she nodded.

"Nice to meet you too, Mr. Castle." She offered him a shy smile, just a corner of her lips tugging up.

"Rick, please." He corrected her and she nodded, checking the time again. Still thirty minutes until she had to go pick up the kids. "Do you have to go?"

"I have to go get my kids in a few minutes." She explained and he nodded, standing up. She sighed, thinking she would probably never see him again and this had just been a cosmic fluke. "But it was great talking to you, Rick."

"You still have a few minutes, right?" He asked and she nodded, standing up as well, surprised to see that she was almost as tall as he was. "Can I buy you a cup of coffee? And I promise my intentions are pure." He grinned at her and she rolled her eyes, chuckling. "I still have a few minutes to kill before picking up Alexis from school. We're going shopping for mother's birthday present."

"Sure." She smiled at him and he touched her elbow to indicate the direction they were going. Kate felt a tingling sensation starting at their point of contact and spreading throughout her arm, but attributed it to being a little start struck.

He was her favorite author, after all. It was only normal.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	2. Chapter 2

**__A/N: You guys are awesome. That is all.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

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><p><strong>At the End of the Tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

_Hang in there._

Kate smiled as she read his text message for the millionth time that night. It still felt surreal. Richard Castle had literally fallen into her life in a way that she would never have imagined, not even in her wildest dreams. After he invited her for a cup of coffee, they had walked to a nearby café, just a block away from the Central Park east entrance. He told her about his mother and how her sixtieth birthday was that weekend and they were throwing her this big party to celebrate. Alexis was adamant that they just had to find the perfect present for her grandmother, but he was at a complete loss about that.

As they sat at one of the comfortable booths in the dimly lit café, she tried to suggest a few options, trying to think of what her own mother would have wanted, had she lived to turn sixty. A waitress came by and took their orders and soon both had steaming cups of caramel cappuccinos in their hands and conversation somehow flowed easily back and forth between them. For those precious few minutes Kate had spent in his company, she felt like her world was not falling apart. He managed to make her forget for just a little while that she didn't have to go home to a cheating husband and look happy in front of her kids so they wouldn't worry.

They only stayed for a little over twenty minutes, but it somehow felt they had talked for hours when he hailed her a cab outside of the little shop. He had saved his number into her contact list and told her she could call anytime and that if she ever needed anything…

"You don't even know me, Rick." She had argued when he told her to promise to call him if something happened. He shrugged and handed back her phone.

"You know how sometimes you meet someone and it feels like you already know them?" He said and she lifted an eyebrow at him. "I guess that just happened with us." He explained with an almost shy, boyish grin. Kate shook her head with a smile and shot him a quick text.

"There. I guess the feeling is mutual." She pursed her lips, trying to hide a smile when he fished his phone from his back pocket and gave her a happy smile. "Thanks for the coffee." She told him, reaching out to touch his arm and got into the cab. "And for listening." She added through the window and he nodded.

"No problem. We should do it again soon." He called after her just as the car started pulling into traffic. She nodded with a smile and he soon disappeared into the crowd of New Yorkers on the busy sidewalk.

She had picked up Olivia and Alex from school and taken them to get ice cream, just like she had planned before Rick Castle dropped unannounced into her life. Her heart felt lighter and she managed to distract both kids enough to wear them out. Right now, Alex was sleeping peacefully in her lap while Olivia watched a movie, curled up next to her on the couch. Jake was nowhere to be found and Kate was strangely grateful for not having to deal with his crap tonight.

Locking her cellphone, she slowly leaned over to put it on the coffee table in front of the couch, careful not to wake Alex up. When she returned to her previous position, she found Olivia looking at her, brows furrowed in thought.

"Okay there, Liv?" She asked quietly, reaching out to touch her daughter's feet that were pressing against her thigh. The girl nodded, but kept staring at her, biting her bottom lip. "What's got you thinking so hard, then, sweetie?"

"Can I ask you a question, mom?"

"Ask away." She smiled at her little girl, tickling her feet, making a fleeting smile grace the girl's features before she turned serious again.

"I was talking to Sophie today at school and she said her parents don't live together anymore. That they were fighting a lot and then her dad moved out a few weeks ago." Olivia explained and Kate nodded, already knowing where this was headed. "Is that what's happening with you and daddy?" She looked away, biting her lip again, unsure, and Kate felt her heart break at the sad look in her eyes.

"Yeah, baby. That's what's happening." She decided to go with the truth. Olivia was such a smart girl, there was no use trying to lie to her when she was inevitably going to have to know what was going on in the very near future.

"So, we're not going to live together anymore?"

"We're still working that out, Liv, but yeah, we're going to have to move out soon." She explained and had to take a deep, fortifying breath when she saw tears welling up in her little girl's eyes.

"But… why?" It came out as a shaky whisper and Kate couldn't take it anymore. Reaching out, she pulled Olivia into her side, hugging the girl close.

"Sometimes…" She started, but had to swallow hard and clear her throat to dislodge the knot that had taken up residence there. "Sometimes things don't work out as well as they used to for mommy and daddy and it's better if they live in separate apartments."

"Is it us? Me and Alex? Did we do something wrong, mom? Because we didn't mean to, I promise." She looked up at Kate with those big, shining blue eyes and Kate brushed away a stray tear that was slowly making its way down her cheek.

"No, baby, no. Not at all. Don't _ever_ think that." She kissed the top of Olivia's head and sighed. "I love you both so much, Liv. So does daddy. That is never going to change, okay?"

"But then why do we have to live somewhere else? I don't get it." Olivia rested her head on Kate's arm and closed her eyes.

"We just don't want to live together anymore. Things are just hard right now, but everything will be okay, I promise you that."

"Pinky promise?" The girl offered her pinky finger to Kate and she smiled, linking her own with her daughter's.

"Cross my heart, baby." Olivia nodded and yawned, leaning into Kate's side again. "Let's go to bed?" The girl nodded again and stood up, waiting for Kate to do the same. She stood up slowly, carrying Alex close to her chest and once she had him secured in her arms she started down the corridor towards his room. "Go brush your teeth, Liv. I'll be right there to tuck you in. Let me just put your brother to bed."

Once Olivia disappeared into her room, Kate leaned against the wall for a moment, holding her little boy's sleeping form close to her, as if she could draw some strength from him. Letting out a heavy sigh, she entered Alex's room and carefully put him down on his bed after pulling the covers down. Covering him with his _Cars _comforter, she leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.

With one last look, she left the room, leaving the door opened just a crack.

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><p><em>Found your mom's present?<em>

Her finger hovered over the send button the next afternoon, unsure if she should text him or not. He had texted her this morning, saying hi, and she had replied, but that had been it. She had been busy tracking down a lead in their latest case, so she only realized she hadn't gotten a text back hours later. Now she wasn't sure if he was busy or maybe his offer the day before had been an empty promise. Taking a sip of her nearly cold coffee, she pressed the send button before she could talk herself out of it.

If he didn't text her back, then she wouldn't bother him again. But she had really enjoyed his company yesterday and, well, the guy was someone she had admired for so long and he had seemed so nice and down to earth – not at all like the playboy the tabloids made him out to be. Maybe this friendship (or whatever it was that was forming between them) was exactly what she needed to get through this horrible process of ending things with Jake.

Detective Ryan called her over to his desk and started rattling off about what he had found out about their victim's financials, which served as a great distraction for her at that moment. When she came back to her desk about an hour later, she picked up her phone and smiled when she saw the alert of a new text message and a missed call from him. Biting her lip, she debated with herself if she should call him back for a minute, before pressing the green button and holding the phone between her ear and shoulder as she made her way to the break room to grab another cup of coffee.

"Hello?"

"Rick, hi. It's Kate Beckett." She said, feeling a little nervous and pathetic for being so worked up over it. "You called?"

"Yeah, I texted you, but you never texted back so I thought I'd give you a call as a last resort." He explained quickly and she thought he sounded a little nervous as well. "Is this a bad time?"

"No, not at all. I left my phone on my desk and had to go look into something with my partner, but I'm good now." She told him and took a deep breath in the end. "So, what's up?" She asked, pouring herself a cup of their disgusting coffee.

"You didn't read my text?"

"No, why?"

"Well," He cleared his throat before continuing. "Our mission in buying my mother a birthday present was not successful yesterday and I'm getting a little desperate here. So, um, I was wondering if maybe you'd like help me out with this? I mean, if you're free, of course. I know you have to be with your kids and everything and-"

"Tonight?" She interrupted his rambling and had to bite on her lip to keep from laughing at his nervous speech. It was hilarious that Richard Castle – a celebrity author – was nervous about asking for her help.

"Yeah. But I totally understand if you can't make it, Kate."

"My dad has the kids tonight, so I can come by whenever to pick them up. I just can't stay out for too long, you know? Things are hard enough for them as it is."

"Of course, don't worry about it. Should I pick you up or do you want to meet somewhere?" His tone was now excited and she smiled involuntarily, taking a sip of her coffee.

"I get off at six, so maybe we can meet at that café we went to yesterday at 6:30?" She suggested and he immediately agreed. "Alright, I'll see you later, Rick."

"Yeah, see you soon, Kate."

They hung up and Kate leaned against the counter in the break room with a sigh. She shouldn't be getting involved with someone in the middle of getting divorced. But she was just helping a friend out, right? It didn't have to be labeled as anything other than that. Besides, she was so not ready to dive into a new relationship and he didn't seem like he was coming on to her. At least she didn't think so, even if the butterflies in her stomach tried to tell her otherwise.

God, she hoped this didn't turn out to be a big mistake on her part.

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><p>"Hi." Kate greeted him with a timid smile when she reached his booth. It was 6:40 and she had gotten stuck in traffic on her way to the coffee shop, feeling bad for making him wait.<p>

"Kate, hi." A happy smile stretched his lips wide as she slid onto the seat across from him. "Do you want to order something?"

"Yeah, do you mind? I didn't really have lunch. Got caught up in this case we're working on." She picked up the menu on the table and started looking through her options.

"Lawyer?" He asked, knowingly and she shook her head, realizing she hadn't told him what she did for a living.

"Actually, no. I'm a detective with the NYPD." She tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and kept her eyes firmly on the menu in front of her.

"No way. Seriously?" The excited tone in his voice made her look up at him, meeting his sparkling eyes. It looked like his inner child was shining through at that moment.

"Yup." She confirmed it with a chuckle and he nodded, still a little awed.

"That is so incredibly cool, Kate." He told her with a wide grin as she called the waitress over and ordered a cappuccino and a croissant. "What kind of detective?"

"Homicide. Just the fun stuff." She teased sarcastically and he chuckled. "I thought I'd told you that yesterday."

"Oh, you definitely left that little detail out. There's no way I would've forgotten that." He leaned back on his seat and watched her for a moment. "How… I mean, a homicide detective isn't exactly a common profession among beautiful women like yourself. How'd you even get into that? Family thing?"

"Kind of. I guess you could put it that way." She bit her lip and closed her eyes for a moment. It still hurt to think about her mom. When she opened them again, he was watching her with concerned eyes. She shook her head and thanked the waitress when the young girl brought her order over. "It has its moments, though. I really like my job most days." She offered him a reassuring smile when he still looked worried and saw him let out a sigh.

"Would you mind talking about it sometime? Your job as a homicide detective, I mean. For research. I told you I'm a writer, right?" He said quickly and she nodded, smiling at him fumbling with his words. "So, you know, I like to get the details right. It'd be great to talk about it with someone who actually knows what it's like."

"Sure, I'd love to, Rick." She nodded with a small smile and took a bite off her croissant.

"So how are you?" He asked after a moment; she swallowed her food and took a sip of her cappuccino before she answered.

"I'm alright. You know, getting by each day, I guess." She leaned back against her seat. "I told Olivia about it last night." She confessed and he gave her a small sympathetic smile.

"Yeah? How'd she take it?"

"She was the one who brought it up. Said her friend's parents are not living together anymore and asked if that's what's happening between me and Jake."

"Ouch, nowhere to run, huh?" He winced and she chuckled with a nod.

"I figured it was easier to tell her the truth. She's a smart girl, she would've found out eventually." Kate shrugged and took another sip. "I just wish this wasn't so hard on her, you know? I hate that she's hurting because of this."

"I know, Kate." He reached out and touched her hand in a comforting gesture, earning a smile from her. "Alexis thankfully doesn't remember much about it. She was three when I divorced Meredith." He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze before letting go. "They'll get used to it. It's hard at first, I'm not going to lie to you. But it'll blow over."

"I hope so. I just want this to be over, but there's just so much I have to do and no time to do it, you know?" She finished her croissant and was quiet for a moment. "I have to start looking for an apartment and hire a lawyer and stuff like that." She let out a frustrated sigh. "Sorry, you don't want to hear any of this." She told him sheepishly and he touched her hand again, holding her gaze.

"Hey, anything I can help with, I'll do it." He offered her a smile and she nodded gratefully. "I told you yesterday, remember? There's something here," he motioned between them. "I want to help. As a friend." He added quickly and she chuckled. "A friend of mine is a lawyer. Maybe you can give him a call. I'm sure he can help."

"That'd be great, Rick." She saved the guy's number on her phone when he showed it to her on his. He asked for the check and the waitress promptly brought it over. "Thanks." She smiled at him, returning his phone, and saw him throwing a twenty on the table and getting up. "No, hey, we can split the bill."

"Don't worry about it, Kate. This one's on me." He smiled at her and waited for her to get off the booth, completely unfazed by the glare she was sending in his direction. "Ready?" He asked when she pulled her jacket back on.

"Yeah, let's go." She started towards the door and felt his arm brushing hers when they stepped outside, making the stubborn butterflies in her stomach go a little crazy. "Where to?" She asked, pulling her hair out of her jacket.

"There's this little shop my mom always goes to. It's just a couple of blocks from here. I thought we could start there?" He suggested and she nodded.

"Sure. Lead the way."

She smiled at him and felt him touch her back momentarily, but then withdrawing his hand quickly and shoving it in his coat pocket. Kate shook her head with a small smile.

Looked like she wasn't the only one having trouble discerning what was right or wrong here.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thank you so much for your awesome feedback, guys! Really.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

* * *

><p><strong>At the End of the Tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

It wasn't until a week later that Kate saw Rick again. They had texted back and forth every day since that night, but she suddenly found herself slammed with a double homicide that had her running haggard after a few days. She would barely make it home in time to see Alex and Olivia still awake and Jake was not making things easier for her. On the second night in a row that she got home after the kids had gone to bed, he would argue that she had no condition to take care of two children working these crazy hours. The irony was that he would taunt her with that, but in the end he didn't want to fight for custody of the kids. It was a done deal that they would stay with her. He just did it to get a rise out of her.

Even though she knew she wasn't at risk of losing her kids, it still kept her awake at night, a recurring nightmare in which Jake would come and disappear with both of them plaguing her sleep. By the end of the following week, she had dark circles under her eyes that she could barely hide with concealer anymore. So when they finally broke the case and got their murderer on Thursday, she made a decision. The Captain had given them the rest of the weekend off so her first move was to schedule a meeting with the lawyer Rick had referred her to. She needed to get a move on with this divorce and it wouldn't happen until she made it official.

It was Friday morning when she walked into Garrett Bishop's office and she was surprised when he told her that Rick had already talked to him about her case and that she would seek his help. His assistance was expensive, but she had done some research on him and it looked like he was one of the very best in New York City. She rarely used the money she had in a trust fund, but she thought this was a special occasion that needed to be dealt with through the best kind of service possible. Kate spent an hour in his office, telling him about what was going on and deciding what the best course of action was.

It was close to noon when she left the office, feeling lighter and more confident now that she had taken the first step in the right direction. Mr. Bishop would draw up the divorce papers and said they would call both parties for a meeting to settle this amicably. She hoped against hope that Jake would go for it – the last thing she needed was to have to settle this in court.

Stepping into the elevator, she pushed the button for the first floor and leaned against the back wall, closing her eyes for a moment. God, she really needed to get some sleep.

"Kate?"

She heard her name and immediately opened her eyes, finding clear blue ones staring back at her with a hint of a smile. Her lips widened in a pleased grin once she took in his suit jacket and jeans with his casually disheveled hair. He reached out and touched her arm in a friendly manner, his smile never fading.

"Hi." She finally said as he settled next to her, their arms brushing. "What are you doing here?" She turned to look at him and realized that, with her high heels, they were pretty much at eye-level.

"Meeting with my publisher. Had to turn in the first three chapters of my new book today or you'd be investigating _my_ murder." He joked and she chuckled, tucking her hair behind her ear. "You? I thought you were still working on that big case."

"Finally caught the guy yesterday. Captain gave us the weekend off after such hard work." She gave him a wry smile. "Thought I'd come by and talk to your lawyer friend."

"Oh, how'd that go? Did you like him?" The doors opened and he touched the small of her back instinctively, guiding her out to the lobby. She pursed her lips to keep from smiling, admonishing herself for feeling like this at just one touch.

"Yeah, he's going to get the divorce papers ready and we'll go from there." She explained and he nodded.

"You're in really good hands, Kate. You have my word on this." He smiled at the doorman and guided her onto the sidewalk. It was an overcast day and it looked like it was going to rain at any moment.

"I'm just glad I'm finally doing something about it, you know?" He turned to her and nodded, brushing his thumb on the small of her back before letting his hand fall to his side.

"I'm assuming you haven't had lunch yet?" He inquired as they walked towards Times Square and Kate shook her head. "Want some company?" He gave her that boyish smile she had come to really like in the past few days and she offered him a small grin.

"Sure. Italian okay?"

"Yeah, whatever you like is fine with me." He touched the small of her back again when they started crossing the street and shoved his hands into his pockets once they were safely on the other side. Kate turned to look at him and smiled at the unsure look in his eyes. "You have any plans after this?" He asked after a moment and caught her staring at him.

"I'm taking the kids shopping after school. They have a birthday party to go to later today and Liv claims she has nothing to wear." She rolled her eyes, fighting a blush at being caught, and he chuckled. "So I still have a couple of hours to kill. Thought I'd go to this book store I love, read a little until then."

"Alright, let's feed you first then." He grinned at her and she looked away, biting her lip. "I know this great little Italian restaurant. You're going to love it."

He led her for a few more blocks and they soon fell into an easy conversation. It was strange, Kate thought. She usually felt shy around strangers, but this thing with Rick was so effortless, this back and forth flowing seamlessly between them that she still thought sometimes it was all too good, too surreal to be true. When she was with him, she completely forgot he was a famous writer – _her favorite writer _– and found it incredibly easy to just be herself.

They had lunch at an Italian restaurant just off 48th Street and he managed to make her laugh more in those couple of hours they spent in that corner booth than she had in weeks, regaling tales of his childhood with a Broadway actress for a mother. He told her about what a hit her birthday party had been that past weekend how he wished she could have made it. He had invited her last Friday, but she had declined, saying she was in the middle of a case and wouldn't be able to make it. It was partially true, but she didn't go because she didn't think it would be appropriate.

She felt incredibly comfortable in his presence and it was becoming harder and harder to discern what was right or wrong in their tentative friendship. She knew that he was giving her space, respecting that she was still married and going through a bad divorce, but she could see that he looked at her differently when he thought she wasn't looking. He was right; there was a strange connection between them and she was more and more aware of it the longer she spent time with him. But it was just something that she couldn't focus on right now. She was not ready to start any kind of relationship and needed to sort her life out first.

"You know, my plans for today were to go home, probably skip lunch and try to get some writing done before Gina kills me." He commented as he helped her into her coat on their way out. "This is so much better." He gave her a timid smile and she nodded, pulling her hair out of her coat. "Sorry I kept you from going to the book store." He once again touched the small of her back and led her out of the restaurant.

"Don't worry about it. Guess we lost track of time, huh?" She turned to look at him through her lashes and found him grinning.

"That's what happens when you're in good company." He winked at her and she laughed, nudging his side playfully. "You need a cab?"

"No, I drove today. My car is a couple of blocks away from here."

"I'll walk you there, then."

"How about I give you a ride? I've still got a few minutes to spare and it looks like it's going to start raining any second now." She offered and he nodded with a happy smile.

"I'd appreciate that, Kate."

She bit her lip and started walking back to the lawyer's building. They were quiet for a few minutes, but it wasn't awkward; it was a comfortable kind of silence with a simmering tension she could feel sizzling between them. Every now and then, she would steal a glance at him and knew he was doing the same when she wasn't looking. It was a little ridiculous in a junior high school kind of way, but she didn't mind. After everything she had been through these past few weeks, this was refreshing for her.

They were half a block away from her car when it started raining really hard. She felt him grab her hand and suddenly she was being dragged to shelter under the roof of a business building's entrance. Once they were safe from the intense downpour, standing in a corner, he turned around to face her, his hair sticking to his forehead as droplets of water made their way down his cheeks. She took one look at him and started laughing, reaching out involuntarily to brush his hair away.

"What the hell was that?" She gasped between laughs and he joined her, taking in her appearance. His hand mimicked her previous move and he brushed her hair away, squeezing it a little to get rid of all the excess water. "Damn, look at this mess." She said quietly when his eyes met hers and she had honestly meant the fact that they were both soaked through, but now she couldn't seem to make herself look away.

"Looks like we're stuck here for a while." He whispered and she realized he was suddenly a lot closer to her. "Unless you've got an umbrella on you."

"Nope. Didn't think to bring one."

Her eyes quickly travelled down to his lips and she watched as his Adam's apple bobbed when he swallowed. When their eyes met again for a moment, he seemed to make a decision and the next thing she knew, his lips were pressed against hers and his body was pressing hers against the wall in the most delicious way and she couldn't think straight. One of his hands came up to touch her cheek gently while the other gripped her hip and pulled her body closer to his.

And then all warning bells were going off in her head because this was wrong, _so very wrong_, and she couldn't be kissing this amazing guy because she was still married and _no_. Wrong. Gathering all the self-restraint she could muster, she pulled away from him, one hand in his chest and the other (although she had no idea how that had happened) wrapped around his neck as if undecided whether she should push him away or pull him closer.

"No, wait. I can't. We can't…" She let out a heavy breath and met his gaze. "We can't do this." She finished in a breathless whisper.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry." He rested his forehead on hers for a moment before pulling away completely. "I don't know what came over me, I'm sorry." He swallowed hard and looked away, moving to lean against the wall next to her.

"I just… I can't start anything right now." She tried to say, but he shook his head.

"I know, Kate. I…" He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I think it's pretty obvious that I like you." He gave her a small smile and she bit her bottom lip, trying not to smile back, but failing. "But this was not… God, I'm sorry?" He finished, looking at her sheepishly.

"Rick," she touched his arm and let out a sigh, trying to put her jumbled thoughts into words that made sense. "That connection you were talking about? I feel it, I really do. But with everything that's going on, I can't even think about this, you know? I have to get my life sorted out first."

"Let's just… forget it ever happened?" He suggested, trying to sound casual, but she could hear the disappointed tone behind it.

"I think so." She reached out and brushed away the remnants of her lipstick on his lips. "At least for now?" She continued and he gave her a tentative smile, his eyes sparkling.

"For now." He agreed and touched her hand. "Where's your car?"

"About half a block away."

"Want to make a dash for it? Looks like this isn't going to stop for a while." He gestured to the rain.

"Yeah, but you're going to have to catch me if I fall in these." She teased pointing to her heels and grabbed his hand. "Ready? One, two, three."

They started forward at the same time, running awkwardly on the sidewalk trying to sidestep the other pedestrians seeking shelter. By the time they made it to her car a couple of minutes later, they were both breathless from the run and from laughing the entire way. Kate almost slipped when she approached the driver's door and he caught her around the waist.

"Careful." He whispered and she hated herself for the shiver that ran through her, the memory of that heated kiss still fresh in her mind.

"Thanks." She turned to look at him and found his lips entirely too close to hers. Taking a deep breath, she stepped out of his arms and opened her door. "Come on." She nodded towards the passenger seat and got in, waiting for him to do the same.

He gave her his address and she eased the car back into traffic. The 15-minute ride to his place was made mostly in silence, but contrary to what Kate thought would happen – especially after that unexpected make out session – it wasn't awkward. She stole glances at him every few minutes and, when he caught her gaze one of those times, he just gave her a small smile and started up conversation. She parked in front of his building and turned off the ignition before turning to him.

"Thanks for the ride, Kate." He leaned in and pressed his lips gently to her cheek, offering her a somewhat timid grin when he pulled away.

"No problem." She smiled back and touched his arm in parting. He nodded and stepped out of the car, circling it quickly over to her side.

"Hey," He started once she had rolled down the window. "I don't want this to make things awkward for us." He leaned down so he could meet her eyes through the opening. "It doesn't change anything, right?" He asked quietly and she could hear a little bit of guilt and insecurity in his voice.

"Doesn't change anything." She reassured him and touched his hand that was resting on the edge of the door, giving it a little squeeze.

"Alright, I'll see you soon?" He inquired and she nodded. "Bye, Kate." He gave her one last smile and turned around to leave. Before he got very far, she found herself calling his name and he turned back to her. "What?" He asked, jogging back to the car.

"I was thinking about checking out a few apartments this weekend. I could use some company if you're up to it." She told him before she chickened out and bit her lip, waiting for his reply.

"Sure. Just let me know when and where." He answered cheerfully and leaned down again, giving a quick peck on her cheek. She waved goodbye at him and he winked, jogging back to his building; it was starting to rain again.

She knew the wisest decision was probably to stay away from him. But, God help her, this magnetism between them was stronger than her.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: You guys are the best! Thanks for sticking with me here.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

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><p><strong>At the End of the Tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

"Mommy?"

Kate heard her little boy's voice and turned around, finding him at the doorway. She was getting ready to go out and look at some apartments she had seen online. Jake was supposed to watch the kids for the day so she had texted Rick earlier, saying she could pick him up around 11 if he was still up for a little apartment hunt. He had responded immediately, making her smile when he said he couldn't wait, ending the message with a ridiculous smiley face. The kiss they had shared the day before was still constantly in her mind, making her lose her train of thought whenever she remembered how his lips had felt like brushing against hers, his hands pulling her closer.

She knew she shouldn't be thinking about that. It had been a mistake. A delicious mistake, yes, but it was still wrong. She had been lost in thought, standing in front of the floor length mirror in her bedroom, when Alex brought her back to reality.

"Hey, baby bear. Come here." She smiled at him and beckoned him to come closer. His hair was messy and he was holding onto Mr. Chuckles, his frazzled stuffed panda that had definitely seen better days. Alex made his way to her, his little hand brushing his dark brown hair away from his eyes before he stopped next to her and leaned against her leg.

"Are you going out, mommy?" He asked quietly and she crouched down to his level, brushing a stubborn strand of his hair that insisted in keep falling over his eyes. "You look pretty." He touched her hair and she grinned, leaning in to give him an eskimo kiss.

"You look very handsome yourself, Mr. Alex." She told him and kissed his nose, making him giggle. "What were you doing just now? Cartoons?" She picked him up and held him to her side, his little legs wrapped around her hips, turning back to the mirror for one last look. He shook his head and leaned against her shoulder.

"Livie wanted to watch _her_ cartoons." He pouted and Kate had to fight the urge to roll her eyes. This was recurring argument between her two children.

"Why don't you watch them with her, silly?" She bumped her forehead on his playfully.

"She's watching Cinderella _again_." Alex scrunched up his nose in mock disgust and Kate laughed.

"Well, you guys are going to have to learn to share that TV." She told him and he crossed his arms over his chest in protest. "Alex, we've already talked about this." She sighed and left the room, still holding him close.

"Where are you going?" He asked her, effectively changing the subject. Kate rolled her eyes – he always did that whenever she started telling him off – and kissed his temple.

"I'm meeting a friend."

"Are we coming with you?"

"No, baby bear. Daddy's staying with you guys today. Maybe he can take you to the park later, how's that?" She suggested, but he frowned, confusion etched on his young features.

"But daddy is going out. He said he has to go to work." He explained and Kate looked at him surprised.

She could still hear Jake in the bathroom, but she had just assumed he was taking a shower to maybe take the kids out. He barely spent any time at their apartment these days and yesterday had been a rare night that he had actually been home. Everything tended to be so awkward between them now that sleeping in the same bed had become a chore. After the kids had been put to bed, he had camped out on the couch in the living room. Kate couldn't say she had been disappointed. The less time they spent together, the better.

"What do you mean, he's going out?" She exclaimed and Alex shrugged. "Why don't you go watch TV with your sister for a little while? I'll be right back, okay?" She kissed his nose again and put him down. Once he was out of sight, she stalked over to the bathroom, and opened the door without even bothering to knock. "What the hell, Jake?"

He jumped, startled, and turned to look at her surprised.

"Hey, a little privacy here." He protested, but she ignored him, entering the bathroom and closing the door behind her.

"I thought we had an agreement." She hissed, but he just looked at her blankly. "You were supposed to stay with the kids today, remember? You told me you would last night."

"Yeah, well, something came up at work. You know how that is." He countered coldly.

"That's not fair. We both have demanding jobs; you cannot just pin this one on me." She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep, calming breath. "You should've told me."

"I thought you were staying home." He shrugged and turned back to the mirror, brushing the towel over his cheeks; it looked like he had just shaved. Once upon a time, she would be all over him after this, but not anymore.

"I told you I had plans." She said through gritted teeth.

"Not my problem, babe." He turned back to her. "Why don't you take them with you?" He suggested with a smirk and Kate had to control herself not to punch it off his pretty face.

"I don't have any choice now, do I?" She opened the door and stepped out of the bathroom, stopping herself after a moment. "By the way, you're getting the divorce papers sometime next week." She told him over her shoulder and when she met his gaze, he was looking at her with wide eyes.

"What the hell are you talking about? I thought you were just going to move out." He whispered harshly and she shrugged.

"I am."

"I don't want to get divorced, Kate." He continued, running a hand through his hair agitatedly. "Do you have any idea what that's going to do to my reputation?"

"Not my problem, is it?" She replied just as coldly as he had talked to her a couple of minutes before. "Have fun at _work_." She put emphasis into it, well aware that he was most likely going to meet one of his bimbos.

He _never_ worked weekends.

* * *

><p>"Where are we going, mom?"<p>

Kate looked at her daughter through the rearview mirror and found her curious blue eyes staring back at her. After her fight with Jake, Kate had gotten the kids ready and they were soon on their way to Rick's. She had texted him saying she was going to be a few minutes late, but that she would be there soon. She really hoped he wouldn't mind that she had brought the kids along. In a way, she felt a little like hypocrite; here she was, on her way to meet a guy and she had been complaining about Jake going to see his bimbos. Granted, she and Rick were friends (even though she could not stop thinking about that kiss) and Jake had admitted to cheating on her for months when Olivia was a baby, then again after Alex was born. He had even confessed to having an on and off affair now.

So, yeah, maybe she shouldn't feel that bad.

"Remember I told you we were going to move soon?" She stopped at a red light and held her daughter's gaze through the mirror, her heart clenching when she saw a hint of sadness cloud her eyes.

"Yeah." The girl nodded and rested her head back on the seat, resigned.

"Well, we're going to visit a few apartments today. See if we can find our new home." She smiled at the girl and sighed when Olivia bit her lip in thought.

"We're gonna move, mommy? What does that mean?" Alex asked curiously from his seat.

"It means we're going to live in a different apartment, baby bear." She told him and turned her attention back to traffic when the light turned green. She stole a glance at her little girl and found her still worrying her bottom lip, brows furrowed in concentration.

"Can we help choose the new place, mom?" Olivia asked after a few minutes and Kate was relieved to see that most of that sadness she had seen before was gone.

"Of course you can, Liv. It's going to be your home too, right? It's only fair that you guys have a say in it." She reassured her daughter and smiled when Olivia grinned.

"Can I still have my own room?"

"I want my own room too!" Alex immediately chimed in and Kate chuckled.

"We'll see, guys." She told them and parked in front of Rick's building. He was already waiting outside and jogged to the car when he spotted them, his eyes widening momentarily when he saw the kids. Opening the door, he quickly slipped inside and gave her a soft smile. "Hi." She smiled at him and watched as he started to move towards her to probably give her a quick kiss hello on the cheek, but decided against it at the last second.

"Hi." He greeted her and lifted his eyebrows in question. "I see we have company." He turned around to smile at the kids, who were watching their interaction curiously. "Hi, guys." He waved at them and Kate sighed in relief when both Olivia and Alex waved back with friendly smiles.

"Guys, this is my friend Rick Castle." She turned around to look at the kids. "Rick, this is Olivia and the little guy here is Alex."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Castle." Olivia said nicely and Kate felt her heart soar with pride for her little girl. Never would she have thought that one day she would be introducing her children to her favorite author.

Then again, she had never thought she would make out with her favorite author either.

"Yeah, nice to meet you, Mr. Castle." Alex copied his sister with a happy grin and Rick chuckled.

"Nice to meet you too. Both of you." He replied and turned to Kate for support. "And you can call me Rick. Mr. Castle makes me feel old." He continued with a grin when Kate nodded at him.

"Are you going to look at apartments with us? Olivia asked and he nodded. "Okay, cool." She smiled and turned to the window.

"Rick?" He heard Alex's voice and turned to the boy. "Do you like ice cream?" He asked seriously and Rick felt like this was a really important question. Turning to Kate, he found her biting her lip to keep from laughing.

"I love ice cream, buddy." He replied and Alex nodded. "What's your favorite?"

"Chocolate chip cookie." He answered immediately and Rick laughed quietly. "Mommy, can we get ice cream later? Please? Pretty please?" Kate looked at him through the rearview mirror and narrowed her eyes at his puppy dog look.

"I'll think about it, mister."

"I promise I'll be really good, mommy." Alex vowed seriously and Kate laughed.

"Yeah, you'd just better." She shook her head and turned to Rick when they stopped at a red light. "Thanks for coming today." She gave him a smile and he returned it in kind, reaching out to touch her arm gently.

"My pleasure, Kate. Everything okay?" He asked quietly and she sighed. "What is it?"

"I'll tell you later." She turned her attention back to traffic, but when she looked at him again, she found him watching her, a hint of concern in his eyes. "I'm fine, Rick. Don't worry." She reassured him and saw him reach out to her again, but catching himself before his hand touched hers.

Maybe the kids coming today was a good thing. At least it would keep them from making another mistake.

* * *

><p>Hours later, they decided to stop by a park near Rick's loft. The kids were tired, but Kate figured that they deserved to play for a little while after being so good today. They had gone to five different apartments, but none of them had felt right to her. There was one in TriBeCa that had caught her eye (and it had an amazing view), but it was a little too expensive for her budget, so she told the real estate agent she would think about it. After the fifth apartment, she was exhausted, so Rick suggested they could maybe go to the park, sit down for a bit while the kids played.<p>

So that's where they were now. Alex was climbing the monkey bars while Olivia played on the swings. Kate and Rick sat on a bench where she could see both her kids and allowed herself to relax for a few minutes. Involuntarily, she found herself leaning against his side, her arm pressed against his.

"Tired?" He whispered and she nodded, trying her hardest to fight the urge to just rest her head on his shoulder. "Is everything okay?"

"Jake is being a jackass." She sighed and shook her head. "He was supposed to stay with the kids today, but he bailed at the last minute. If it weren't for Alex telling me, I wouldn't have even known he was going out."

"So that's why they came with you today." He completed and she nodded, closing her eyes for a moment. "Well, I'm glad you brought them. They're pretty amazing, Kate." He gave her a gentle smile and Kate smiled back, feeling the butterflies going crazy in her stomach. "I miss when Alexis was this age. We had a blast back then."

"How old is she now?" She asked, realizing she had never bothered to find out.

"Sixteen." He sighed. "Guess what I found out last night."

"What?"

"She's dating." He covered his face with his hands and Kate chuckled. "My little girl, Kate. She already has a boyfriend. That's not right." He groaned and Kate patted his knee comfortingly.

"Well, she's growing up. It's normal. I had my first boyfriend when I was fourteen. I was so in love. Or at least I thought I was at the time." She laughed quietly to herself. "Ethan Spencer. I haven't seen him in years. I wonder what happened to him." She mused to herself and shook her head, only to find him watching her. "Bottom line is, this is probably her first love, you know? She must be over the moon." She shrugged. "And she's a good kid, right?"

"The best." His arm had somehow made its way behind her, over the top of the bench, and she could feel its warmth as leaned back against it.

"So there you go. Don't worry so much." She nudged his side playfully and leaned a little against him. They were quiet for a couple of minutes, watching the kids play, enthralled in their own little worlds. "I told Jake about the divorce papers." She said quietly after a while and felt his hand touch her arm gently.

"How'd he take it?" He whispered, running the tip of his fingers slowly up and down her arm.

"Not well." She let out a sigh. "Said he doesn't want a divorce, that it'll ruin his reputation." She rolled her eyes at the memory. "It was ridiculous."

Before he could say anything, they heard a cry coming from the direction of the monkey bars and Kate saw Olivia running towards her brother, who was crying on the ground. She could see a bump already forming on his forehead as she rushed to her son. When she reached them, Olivia was holding him close, whispering to him that he was going to be okay and Kate felt her chest tighten at the scene.

"Hey, baby bear, what happened?" She kneeled down to take him from her daughter's arms and nodded at the girl reassuringly when she still looked a little panicked.

"I think he bumped his head on one of the bars, mom." Olivia told her over her brother's cries. "Shhh, Alex, you're going to be okay. I promise." She tried to soothe him and Kate felt her lips tugging up slightly at her little girl's concern.

"We should get some ice on that bump." She heard Rick's voice and looked up at him. "You know, I live just a couple of blocks away. We can do that there, if you want." He offered and she looked at him unsure.

"I don't want to impose, Rick." She tried to say, but he shook his head.

"You're not imposing, Kate. Come on. Let's go take care of your boy." He smiled at her reassuringly and she sighed with a nod, standing up with Alex in her arms. His cries had decreased to little whimpers as he hugged her neck tightly, his head on her shoulder.

"Do you mind going to Rick's for a few minutes, Liv? Just to get some ice on Alex's forehead?" Kate asked her daughter, who shook her head.

"Of course not, mom. We should go make Alex better."

Once they were on their way back to her car, Rick leaned in discreetly to whisper in her ear.

"Relax. This doesn't have to mean anything." He tried to reassure her and she turned to him, finding him watching her, a myriad of feelings running through his eyes. "I promise."

"I'm not…" She started, but hesitated on what she was going to tell him. Saying she was not worried would give the wrong impression. Then again, saying she was would also give the wrong impression. God, why did this have to be so complicated? "Let's just… behave." She sighed, a chuckle escaping her lips at the ridiculousness of the situation.

"I'll be a very good boy, detective." He grinned and she could hear the teasing tone in his voice.

The problem was, she didn't know if she wanted him to be.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I'm so, so sorry I took this long to update, guys. Life got in the way, then my tendinitis was acting up, so I had to stay away from writing for a little while. Thanks for sticking with me, though. I appreciate all your support and feedback. A special shoutout to Castletasmic, who sent me the sweetest message ever earlier tonight. I hope you like it and that this was worth the wait.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine. Unfortunately.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 5<strong>

"Let's get you some ice, little guy."

Kate looked back and smiled at the scene. Rick was carrying Alex to the kitchen, her son's little legs wrapped around his hips as he giggled at something Rick whispered in his ear. Alex had taken to Rick immediately and had stuck to his side like glue all day. It was only when they had stopped at the park so the kids could play that he finally left Rick's side. Kate had been watching them curiously and wondered if Alex was just reveling in the fact that Rick actually took the time to play with them and tell them stories. Maybe the fact that he seemed so taken with her favorite author was because he was so unlike his father.

And that was just heartbreaking for her, that her little boy lacked a good male role model in his life. Not that Jake was all that bad, but he never took the time to just play with his kids or just hang out with them. He fulfilled his parental duties, yes, but it seemed that the novelty of being a father had ended for him by the time Olivia turned two. When Alex was born, he had been there at first, but then he started spending more and more time at work and these days he was always too busy to do something with the kids. She had even been surprised when Jake had told her last night that he could stay with the kids for the day. Oh well, she should have known better.

"I think it's here, mom." Olivia opened a door that led to a small bathroom just off to the right of his office.

Her daughter had been desperate to go to the bathroom and, as soon as they had made it to the loft, Rick directed them to the nearest bathroom and told Kate he could take Alex to the kitchen to ice his forehead.

"You okay by yourself, sweetie?" Kate asked when Olivia went in. "I just want to go check on Alex."

"I'm fine, mom. I just gotta pee." She rolled her eyes at her and Kate chuckled at how uncanny the resemblance between them was when she did that.

"Alright, yell if you need anything." Kate insisted and Olivia nodded, closing the door behind her. "We'll be in the kitchen." She called out and heard her daughter's muffled reply through the door. Making her way back into the living room, she found Rick holding a dishcloth with ice to Alex's forehead. She allowed herself to watch them for a couple of minutes, as her son listened intently to a story Rick was telling him, before she made her way into the kitchen. "Hey," She smiled at them, stopping next to Rick to check the damage on her boy's forehead. "How's the head, baby bear?"

"Doesn't hurt so much anymore." The boy replied and Kate leaned in to press a gentle kiss to the small bump on his forehead. "Rick was telling me a story." He continued and proceeded to recount the tale of pirates and the seven seas and princesses and treasures that Rick had obviously came up with while she was with Olivia in the bathroom. "And then, the pirate ended up saving the princess, mommy. And then they found the treasure and lived happily ever after." He told her excitedly, to which Kate grinned and turned to Rick amused. He only shrugged and bumped her shoulder with his affectionately.

"All done, mom." They heard Olivia's voice as she came up behind them. "Feeling better, Alex?" She asked, looking up at her brother that was sitting on the kitchen island. Alex nodded and started telling her the story again, making Kate shake her head with a chuckle.

"Thanks for taking care of him." She whispered, leaning against his side for a moment, while the kids were distracted talking.

"Don't worry about it. I'm glad I could help." She felt his hand squeeze her waist comfortingly for a moment. "You okay?" He asked quietly and she nodded, resisting the urge to rest her head on his shoulder, feeling exhausted all of a sudden.

"Yeah, just tired, I guess." She turned to him and offered a small smile. "I'm glad you could come with us today."

"Me too, Kate." He brushed a strand of hair behind her ear and stepped away, his hand trailing the small of her back, her wrist, until it found her hand for a quick squeeze. "Coffee?"

"Yeah, that'd be great." She bit her lip to hide a smile at his tactic to keep her there for a little while longer.

"Hot chocolate for the little ones?" He asked and she nodded, turning back to the kids who were busy playing thumb wrestling, a fierce look of concentration on their young faces.

She watched them for a few minutes while Rick prepared their drinks. They were so carefree, so innocent. She hoped that the divorce wouldn't damage their childhood too much. It was for the better, though, she kept telling herself. The way they were living now, with their parents fighting constantly was way worse. She could already see how it was affecting Olivia, but she would try her hardest to minimize any trauma for her children. Ever since she had told her little girl that they were really getting a divorce, she seemed to be a bit better. It seemed as if having the confirmation that it was actually happening gave her time to come to terms with it. She had even been excited to find a new apartment this afternoon.

"Here you go, my beautiful lady." She heard his quiet voice and narrowed her eyes at him, a pleased smile playing on her lips nonetheless when he handed her the ceramic mug of freshly brewed coffee. She thanked him and watched as the kids squealed in delight when he gave them their hot chocolate. "Good?" He asked after giving the kids a plate with cookies.

"Perfect." She bit her lip again and nudged his side gratefully. He smiled at her and pressed a soft kiss to her temple, after checking that the kids were completely focused on their snack.

"Do you have plans for tonight?" He asked quietly and she shook her head. "Want to stay for a little while? We could watch a movie maybe?" He suggested and she thought she could hear a bit of shyness in his tone.

"I'd love to. But we can't stay for too long. Have to get them home soon." He nodded and she turned to Alex and Olivia. "Hey, guys? How about we watch a movie before we go home?"

"Can we watch Toy Story? Please?" Alex immediately chimed in and Kate chuckled when Olivia rolled her eyes at her brother. The boy had seen that movie way too many times for his own good and Buzz Lightyear was his idol. Kate turned to Rick and lifted an eyebrow in question.

"How about you guys go take a look at what we have right over there. The kids movies are closer to the TV." He told them, pointing to his extensive movie collection.

"You sure about this? Watching a kids movie with two hyper kids?" She asked when Alex and Olivia rushed off to the living room.

"You're forgetting my kid was their age not too long ago." He countered and she nodded with a grin.

"Where is she, by the way?"

"At the movies with Ashley, the boyfriend." He nearly pouted and she rolled her eyes, giving his arm a squeeze. "I just can't wrap my head around it, you know? She's my little girl."

"At least she told you about him. That right there is a huge step forward." She told him, her hand trailing down his arm to find his.

"I guess." He sighed and she tugged him by the hand.

"Come on, let's watch a movie."

* * *

><p>"He really likes you, you know." She commented about an hour into the movie, watching Alex's sleeping form slumped into Rick's side. He looked down at the boy and smiled, running a gentle hand through the boy's dark hair.<p>

"Well, it's mutual. He's great, Kate. They both are." He added, looking over to Olivia, who had curled up on the chair and was sleeping peacefully, her hair covering most of her young face.

"Thanks." She smiled at him and looked down at their thighs pressed together on the couch. They had started out at a respectable distance, but as the movie progressed and the kids fell asleep, they had slowly gravitated towards each other, ending up with their sides pressed together like that. He stretched his arm and let it rest on the back of the couch, his fingers casually doing a slow dance up and down her arm. She rolled her eyes at him and tucked her feet underneath her, leaning more comfortably into his side. "We suck at this." She laughed after a few minutes.

"At what?" He asked, but she could hear the laughing tone in his voice and elbowed him playfully.

"This." She gestured between them. "Staying apart." She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder, like she had been wanting to do all day. "I mean, you do realize we've only known each other for a couple of weeks, right?"

"Doesn't feel like it." He murmured and pressed a kiss to her hair. "But, Kate, if you want me to back off, I will." He continued and she lifted her head to meet his eyes. "I mean, I don't want to, but I will. If you want me to, just say the word"

"It's just-" She swallowed and looked away, watching her sleeping daughter for a moment. "I don't know how to explain it, Rick. I…" She paused again, trying to gather her thoughts. "You're making my life a little easier to handle right now, you know, with everything that's been going on." She said quietly and he nodded, pulling his arm back to he could brush her hair behind her ear. "And after what happened yesterday…" She felt a blush creeping up her neck and bit her lip, feeling stupid for blushing over the memory of a kiss. "It's getting harder to stay away, you know? Did that even make sense?"

"It did. It does." He chuckled, cupping her cheek in his palm and she leaned into his touch. "I told you I like you, Kate. A lot. I care about you more than I ever thought possible to care about someone I've only known for a few days. But I do." A timid smile blossomed on her lips as he gently brushed his thumb under her eye in a soft caress. "I know things are difficult right now and I don't want to mess that up for you. So I'm following your lead here."

"It's like I told you, I need to get my life sorted out. Especially because of them, you know?" She nodded toward her kids. "But the feeling is mutual." She turned her head and pressed a kiss to his palm.

"Yeah?" He grinned happily and she chuckled, nodding.

"Yeah." She took a deep breath before touching his hand, wrapping it in hers. "We should probably get going." He threaded his fingers through hers before she could pull away.

"You working tomorrow?"

"No, I usually have the weekends off because of the kids." She smiled when he started caressing the back of her hand with his thumb. "But I'm probably staying home with them." She finished and he pouted playfully, making her roll her eyes.

"I'm going to miss you." He whispered, bringing her hand to his lips.

"Me too." She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment, reveling in the feeling of his lips on her skin. "Maybe we can do lunch on Monday? If I don't catch a case, that is."

"It's a date, detective." She narrowed her eyes at him and he grinned sheepishly. "Okay, not a date." He corrected and Kate laughed.

"This is such a mess." She shook her head and stood up, immediately missing the warmth of his body close to hers. He chuckled and followed suit, leaning in to kiss her cheek.

"We'll figure it out, Kate." He smiled when she bit her lip and pressed his lips to her cheek again. "I'll help you take the kids down to the car."

She sighed and nodded, leaning down to pick Alex up. They could do this.

* * *

><p>"I think I found an apartment." She told him quietly as soon as he answered the phone.<p>

It had been a couple of weeks since that night at Rick's loft and they had seen each other a few times since then whenever they could. They would usually meet for lunch or a cup of coffee at what had become _their_ coffee shop as free time was few and far in between, especially for Kate. That first week after their talk, her team had caught a high profile case that had proven to be one of the hardest of her career yet. She had barely had time to be home with her kids and had only seen Rick once that week. Although their relationship remained strictly platonic, Kate knew it was getting harder and harder to stay away from each other. Their physical contact was friendly, but that lingering tension was always there and, as much as she tried to control herself, sometimes she would find herself leaning against his side while they were waiting for a cab or to cross the street.

During those two weeks, she had barely had time to look for other apartments, but she had been browsing online and had finally found one that looked really good and was within her price range. She had just closed the latest case with her team and was about to leave to pick up Alex and Olivia from school to drop them off at her dad's. Every Thursday night was Grandpa's time as Alex had dubbed it and they usually spent the night at her dad's apartment. Originally it was supposed to give her and Jake some alone time, but for the past couple of years, those were the nights she usually stayed late at the precinct, so she wouldn't have to go back to an empty apartment or go back to Jake and have a fight.

"Yeah? Where is it?" He asked and she could hear some background noise, like he was looking for something.

"Upper West Side. 105th and Amsterdam." She poured herself a cup of the crappy coffee at the break room. "Want to go check it out with me? If you're not busy." She added as an afterthought and took a sip of the hot drink, grimacing at the taste.

"I just need to finish writing this chapter, and then I'm all yours, detective." She could hear the smirk in his voice and shook her head, amused.

"Want me to pick you up?" She offered, making her way back to her desk to check her emails before she had to leave.

"No, that's okay. I can come meet you. Are you at work?"

"Yeah, I'm leaving soon, though. Have to pick up the kids from school and then drive them to my dad's." She explained and took another sip of her coffee. "Want to meet me here?"

"Sure thing. I'll be there in an hour. Twelfth Precinct, right?" He asked and she confirmed. "I'll see you soon, Kate."

"See you soon." She said warmly and was about to hang up when she heard him calling her name. "What?"

"Dinner later?" He said softly and she bit her lip, trying to ignore the mutinous butterflies in her stomach.

"Dinner later." She agreed and hung up, taking a final sip of her coffee to hide the smile that had made its way to her lips.

Making an effort to pull herself together, she checked her email and the news while she waited for him. It was close to 2pm and the kids wouldn't be out until 3, so they still had time. When she had exhausted all her possibilities on the internet, she thought she would get a head start on the paperwork for their latest case, which proved to be a great distraction. She had been so concentrated, that she jumped, startled, when her phone rang. Smiling when she saw his name flashing on the screen, she hit the answer button.

"I'm down here. Are you ready to go or should I come up?" He asked and she started gathering her things after shutting down her computer.

"I'll be right down. Give me two minutes." She told him and stood up, pulling her jacket on. "Hey, guys? I'm going to go pick up the kids at school." She told her partners, Detectives Ryan and Esposito, walking over to their desks. "Then I'm going to check out this apartment, okay?" She explained quietly and they nodded. They were always concerned about her situation with Jake and she knew they had her back if anything ever happened. "Call me if something comes up?"

"Sure thing, Becks." Ryan offered her a small smile and she nodded, thanking them.

"Everything going okay?" Esposito asked quietly. "The jackass signed the papers yet?" He said and Kate hid a smile, shaking her head. They were fiercely protective of her and when they found out what Jake had been doing all these years, Kate had to make them promise they wouldn't beat his sorry ass up.

"My lawyer says they'll be ready soon and we'll have to have a meeting to discuss everything." She told them and they nodded.

"Well, you know if you need anything…" Ryan started and she nodded, touching his shoulder gratefully.

"I know, guys. I really appreciate it." She smiled and started to make her way to the elevator.

"Tell Liv and Alex we said hey." Esposito called after her and she acquiesced, waving goodbye at them when the elevator doors opened as soon as she pushed the button.

Pressing the button to the first floor, she leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes for a moment. It had been a long week and she was now feeling the toll the latest cases had taken on her. Earlier today a suspect had tackled her and she had fallen on her wrist. At the time, with adrenaline pumping through her veins, she hadn't felt anything, but now that she was starting to relax, she could feel it throbbing painfully. Looking down at her wrist just as the doors opened on the first floor, she grimaced when she saw it was a little swollen. Damn it.

Looking up, her eyes immediately found his and she watched as concern clouded his features when he realized she was holding her wrist. He made his way toward her and met her halfway to the entrance door.

"Hey," He greeted her concerned. "What happened to you?" He touched her left wrist and she grimaced at the contact.

"It's nothing, Rick. Just had an accident earlier." She tried to smile at him reassuringly, but he still looked worried. "Hey, don't worry about it. I'll put some ice on it when I get home." She reached out and touched the hand that was still holding her wrist, tugging on it to get him moving.

"Are you sure? It looks like you sprained it, Kate. Shouldn't you go see a doctor?" He insisted and she grimaced when he touched it again. God, it was hurting really bad now. "Please? At least for my peace of mind?" He smiled at her and she rolled her eyes, fighting a smile.

"I have to go get the kids first. They'll be out in twenty minutes."

"We'll go get them, drop them off at your dad's and then I'm taking you to the hospital." He said and she nodded, seeing no point in trying to fight this.

Handing him the keys (she was in no fit state to drive with an injured wrist), she led him to her car and they were soon parking in front of her children's school. She got out to meet them and hugged them tightly before going back to the car. She hadn't seen them much in the past few days and she missed just spending time with her babies. Alex was over the moon when he saw Rick was driving with them and shot question after question at him the entire way to her dad's place. He had been talking nonstop about seeing Rick again since that weekend and managed to get them to agree to go to the park this Saturday in his own sneaky way. Kate smiled, amused, cradling her sprained wrist with her right hand.

When they arrived at her dad's, Olivia cornered her about her injury, after Alex had dashed away to his grandpa's arms.

"What happened here, mom?" She asked, concerned. "And don't tell me it's nothing. I can see it's hurting."

"I had an accident at work today, honey. Nothing to worry about, I promise." She hugged her little girl with her good arm and leaned down to kiss her hair. "Rick is taking me to the hospital to get it checked out, Liv. It's probably just a sprain, okay? Don't worry that pretty little head of yours." She smiled at her and kept her arm around her daughter. "Did you have a good day at school?"

"Yeah, it was fun. We're learning about the planets in science class. It's really cool." Olivia looked up at her with a smile and Kate nodded.

"Yeah? How about you tell me all about it tomorrow after school? We'll go out, just the three of us. How's that?" She suggested and Olivia nodded, smiling.

Pressing another kiss to her daughter's head, she went to find Alex and her dad to say goodbye before making her way downstairs. Rick drove her to the nearest hospital and they had to wait for over an hour to get the final say from the doctor. Kate rested her head on Rick's shoulder while they waited in the Emergency Room and held onto his hand while they wrapped her wrist tightly after the doctor had confirmed a mild sprain.

He kept her hand in his on the way out of the hospital and Kate turned to him with a wry smile when they reached her car, leaning against it before he could open the driver's door.

"Go ahead, I know you're dying to say I told you so." Her eyes sparkled and she lifted an eyebrow at him playfully. He chuckled and entwined their fingers together.

"I told you so." He said jokingly and touched her cheek when she laughed, rolling her eyes. "I'm just glad you're okay, Kate. And that it wasn't something worse." He told her quietly and she leaned into his touch, letting out a sigh.

"Thank you." She whispered, leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. "You're too good to me." She murmured in his ear and moved to kiss his cheek again, but found his lips instead. Startled for a moment, she froze, but then let out a sigh and allowed herself to enjoy his lips on hers for just a moment. They kept it chaste and she felt his hands framing her face gently, before pulling away and resting her forehead on his. "This is not helping." She said lightly and he chuckled, pushing her hair behind her ear before pressing his lips to hers again in a quick kiss.

"Just a moment of weakness. And I swear it was an accident." He grinned at her and she nudged his shoulder as she made her way to the passenger side.

"Sure it was." She smirked at him and shook her head, getting into the car. He grinned at her, leaning in to kiss her cheek, before pulling the car into traffic. "You're impossible." She laughed quietly and he stole a glance at her, unable to wipe the grin from his face.

"Where to now, milady?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I've had this chapter ready to go for hours, but was down. Looks like things are up and running again now. Hope you enjoy this one. Thank you so much for all your reviews, alerts and messages. You guys rock my world.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

* * *

><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 6<strong>

"So what do you think?" Kate asked, leaning against the doorsill that led from the spacious living room to the dining room.

They had finally made it to the apartment she had seen online and, after telling them all the perks of the place and how it was a total bargain, the real estate agent left them alone to check the place for themselves, without hovering her clients. The perky thirty-something woman had been eyeing Rick hungrily since they had walked through the door and, even though Kate knew she had absolutely no right to be, she found herself nearly growling at the woman in jealousy. After a while, the agent retreated to the kitchen while they checked the rest of the apartment.

"I like it. It's big, so the kids will have more than enough space to play." He commented, making his way back to her from where he was standing by the window. "What do _you_ think?" He asked, his right hand reaching out involuntarily to trail up and down her arm.

"I think this is it." Kate told him with a small smile. "And it's got three bedrooms, so they'll have separate rooms like they do at Jake's. At least that won't change." Her smile only grew when he tugged on her hand and led her back to one of the big windows in the living room.

"The view isn't bad either." He murmured in her ear when she stopped in front of him, looking out the window. She felt a shiver run through her body and had to take a deep breath to calm down her racing heart. She took in the amazing view of Central Park just a few blocks away and sighed contentedly, allowing herself to relax into his chest.

"Yeah." She replied with a happy smile, turning her head to meet his eyes for a moment when she felt his arms encircle her waist. "Looks like we have a winner." She announced quietly and rested her head back on his shoulder, unable to do the sensible thing and step away from his arms. "I'll bring the kids over this weekend so they can see it too." She whispered and sighed when she felt him press his lips gently, chastely, to her neck. "Rick…"

"Right. I know. Sorry." She heard him let out a heavy sigh and take a step back from her, deciding to take her hand for the moment. "This is a lot harder than I thought it would be." He commented and she chuckled, giving his hand a quick squeeze, before threading her fingers through his.

"I know." She bit her lip and looked at him through her lashes, her thumb caressing the back of his hand. "I guess spending so much time together doesn't help us either."

"I guess." He shrugged and was about to say something else when the real estate agent decided to make an appearance.

"So, what did you think? Isn't it to die for?" She asked Rick cheerfully, a hint of a leer in her eyes that had Kate squeezing his hand in an effort not to say anything rude to the woman. She glanced at Rick for a moment and found him grinning at her, an amused look dancing in his eyes. She glared at him before turning to the woman.

"I'll take it." Kate told her and she clapped her hands in fake excitement. "How soon can we move in?"

"Oh, that's wonderful, darling. You and your kids are going to love it here. I just know it." She beamed, but her smile faltered when she caught a glance of Rick and Kate holding hands. "I'll, uh, I'll have the papers ready for you tomorrow."

"Great, I'll stop by the agency tomorrow then."

She smiled sweetly at the woman and wished her a good night, tugging on Rick's hand. She knew it was petty and childish and that she had absolutely no claim on him, but she was pleased to have warded off this unwanted female attention on him. The agent locked the apartment and they took the elevator together in a tense silence. She could feel Rick staring at her, but tried her best to ignore the heat of his eyes burning a hole on her face. When they finally reached her car – sans real estate agent, thank god – he tugged on her hand, catching her in his arms when she stumbled back.

"Was it just me or were you a little bit jealous back there?" He asked, amused, and she narrowed her eyes at him.

"I was _not_ jealous." She huffed and looked down at her shoes, anywhere but him. "Not like I have any right to be." She mumbled under her breath, shaking her head at her own stupidity.

"Kate," He touched her chin and made her look up at him, cradling her cheek when her eyes met his. "For what it's worth? If it had been the other way around, I would've been crazy jealous too." He confessed, getting a timid smile out of her.

"I just feel stupid. It's not like we're even together." She leaned forward, resting her forehead on his shoulder for a moment.

"That's only a technicality and you know it." He retorted and she chuckled, looking back up at him. "It's only a matter of time, babe." He assured her and pressed a kiss to her cheek, dangerously close to her mouth, leaving her a little breathless. "Come on, let's get some dinner." He walked her to the passenger side and opened the door for her with a grin. She rolled her eyes and got in, waiting for him to do the same.

"Wait," she said when he settled behind the wheel and turned on the ignition. "Did you just call me babe?"

"I guess." He shrugged, stealing a glance at her before focusing back on pulling the car into traffic. "You don't like it?" He threw her a boyish pouty look and she rolled her eyes again, reaching over gently with her injured wrist to rest her hand on his thigh with a smile.

"Guess I'll let it slide once in a while."

* * *

><p>"Are you going out with the kids today?"<p>

She turned around and found Jake watching her from the bedroom door. It was late Sunday morning and she was putting on the finishing touches on her makeup, having nearly poked herself in the eye when his voice startled her. She was getting ready to go to Rick's birthday lunch at the loft and he had insisted that she brought Olivia and Alex along, saying that his daughter was going to be there and was dying to meet them. Apparently he had been talking about her and the kids nonstop lately, she thought with a pleased smile. Looking back at her reflection in the mirror, she appraised her dark green blouse and close fitted jeans, deeming herself appropriately dressed for the occasion.

"Yeah, I am." She replied casually, applying her eyeliner the rest of the way.

"Where are you going?" He insisted, stepping into the room and sitting on the bed directly behind her. Kate glared at him through the mirror. It wasn't like he always told her where he was off to with his current bimbo or if he was actually working. Why should she extend the same courtesy?

"A friend's birthday party." She replied coldly, depositing the eyeliner on her dresser before grabbing her purse and phone.

"Which friend?"

"It's none of your business, Jake. Are you keeping tabs on me now?" She asked, annoyed, a warning tone in her voice.

"Well, you're taking our kids with you, so yes, I want to know where you're going with them." He retorted, anger starting to seep into his features. She really needed to move out as soon as possible; they couldn't even have a conversation without turning it into a fight.

"I already told you. A friend's birthday party in TriBeCa." She repeated tiredly, shoving her phone into her purse and taking a last look at herself in the mirror.

"Who's Rick?" His sudden question made her nearly trip over her feet, her breath knocked out of her lungs. How did he even know about him? When she didn't say anything for almost a minute, Jake took out a folded piece of paper from his back pocket and unfolded it, handing it to her. She recognized it as one of Alex's drawings. "Alex showed this to me and said that it's from a story Rick told him yesterday at the park. So, I'll ask you again. Who is Rick?"

"He's a friend. Alex likes him." She responded evenly, trying to keep her breathing under control.

"Yeah? What kind of friend? You letting him fuck you?" He snarled, venom dripping from his voice, but he was interrupted by her hand slapping his cheek hard. "You bitch." He hissed, bringing a hand to his burning cheek.

"Don't you _ever_ talk to me like that again." Her tone was cold, but she could feel herself start shaking with repressed anger as tears welled up in her eyes.

"You're cheating on me." He stated angrily, but she ignored him and started toward the door. He grabbed her wrapped wrist and pulled her back, making her gasp in pain.

"Goddamn it, Jake. What the hell do you think you're doing?" She hissed in pain, cradling her throbbing wrist to her chest.

"You're cheating on me." He repeated angrily. "With this Rick guy. Aren't you?"

"It's none of your business, Jake." She spat at him, walking back to the door. "And that's really rich coming from you. Now get the hell out." She gestured towards the entrance and waited for him to walk through it before leaning against the doorsill and taking a deep calming breath. She was still shaking with anger and pain and her wrist was killing her. Walking towards the living room, she found Alex and Olivia watching TV together, ready to go. "Come on, guys, let's go." She said with as firmly as she could, trying to breathe slowly in and out.

She hailed a cab outside of their building – she still couldn't drive because of her sprained wrist – and soon they were knocking on Rick's door. Olivia was throwing worried glances at her and she was afraid that the kids had heard her fight with Jake, even if they hadn't been loud for once. She brushed a hand over her blouse, trying to pull herself together before Rick opened the door with a happy smile.

"Hey, you guys made it." He said excitedly and ushered them inside, ruffling Alex's hair playfully.

"Happy birthday, Rick. We brought you a present." Alex told him happily, handing him the wrapped parcel.

"Yeah, happy birthday, Rick." Olivia told him with a smile and Kate smiled at the scene, finally feeling the tightening in her chest starting to dissolve a little. He tore the wrapping like a little kid and his eyes widened when he saw what was inside.

"Kate…" He started, looking from her to the very first edition of the Batman comic book. "How…?"

"I know a guy who knows a guy." She shrugged, grinning at his obvious delight and closed her eyes when he wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. That was exactly what she had been craving since her fight with Jake.

"I've been looking for this for ages. Thank you so much." He whispered, kissing her cheek and pulled back to look at her, apparently catching the off look in her eyes, because his smile faltered. "What is it?" He asked quietly, but she shook her head.

"Later." She murmured, finding his hand and giving it a squeeze. "Happy birthday." She gave him a small smile and pressed a kiss to his cheek. "I'm fine, Rick." She said in his ear when he kept his arm around her and he nodded, reluctantly letting her go.

"Make yourselves at home, guys." He turned to the kids, leading them into the living room. "Pumpkin, come here." He called out and Kate saw a red haired girl walking in from the kitchen's direction. "Guys, this is my daughter Alexis." He introduced with a smile and the girl smiled at them. "Honey, this is Detective Kate Beckett and her kids, Alex and Olivia."

"Nice to meet you guys. I've heard so much about you, you have no idea." She chuckled and Kate felt herself starting to relax.

"It's great to finally meet you, Alexis. We've heard a lot about you too, trust me." Kate told her, as they settled on the couch and chairs in the living room.

"I hope you guys are hungry." Rick called, making his way to the kitchen.

"Yeah, we're just waiting on Gram now. He went all out this year and there's enough food to feed an army." Alexis told them conspiratorially, making the kids giggle and getting an amused smile from Kate.

They fell into an easy conversation with Alexis telling them about school and which universities she was thinking about applying to. Then she took both Alex and Olivia to her room to choose a board game while they waited for Rick's mother. A couple of hours later, when Rick was already getting worried, Martha showed up, saying her flight had been delayed in Chicago due to a storm. Kate had thought she was going to be nervous – she was meeting his mother, after all, and he was her… well, whatever they were to each other – but Martha had been so nice to her, regaling tales of Rick's childhood that only served to embarrass him and make the kids laugh, that by nightfall, Kate was completely at ease with his family.

It had started to rain incessantly outside and they had no choice, but to wait it out, according to Rick. Around 7, Martha excused herself and went to her room to take a shower and relax. She was just coming home from a two-week tour with her current play and claimed to be exhausted. Alexis had set up the Wii in the living room and was keeping the kids entertained. Olivia had taken quite a shine to Alexis and wouldn't leave the girl's side, which made Kate smile in relief that they all got along. Alex had been attached to Rick for most of the day, but the second Alexis invited him to play video games, he was gone.

And that left Rick and Kate finally by themselves. After making sure that the kids were taken care of, he had signaled to Alexis that he and Kate were going to talk in his office and took Kate's hand in his after his daughter's nod. She went willingly, threading her fingers through his as she had been dying to do all day.

They were seriously ridiculous at this staying apart thing.

"Hi." He said softly, once he had closed the door behind him, leaning against it. Kate smiled and stepped closer to him, letting him pull her closer by the hand until she rested her head on his shoulder and he wrapped an arm around her waist.

"Hi." She sighed, finally relaxing completely now that she was in his arms. "Happy birthday." She told him and kissed his cheek, tracing the contours of his face gently with her finger.

"Thank you for spending it with me." He whispered, kissing her finger when it brushed his lips, earning a small smile from her. "Want to tell me what happened?" He asked gently, drawing circles on the small of her back absentmindedly.

"Jake happened." She rolled her eyes, but she could feel that anger and sadness and pain threatening to take over her again. "He knows about you." She murmured, resting her head on his shoulder again.

"How?" He turned his head and pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead, pulling her a little closer to his body, trying to give her some sort of comfort.

"Alex told him, actually. You know how he loves your stories, right?" She pulled back, enough to meet his eyes. "And he loves to draw, so he did a drawing of that new pirate story you were telling him about yesterday."

"God, I'm so sorry, Kate." He told her, feeling guilty, but she shook her head.

"Don't worry about it. You're so good with him, Rick. He's not always this open with other people outside of out family, but he really likes you." She reassured him, tracing the shell of his ear with her thumb. "The problem was that Jake accused me of having an affair with you and… I'm not even going to repeat his words, but he basically called me a whore." She finished in an angry whisper and bit her lip, suddenly realizing that tears had welled up in her eyes. "And it's just so hypocritical of him because he's been cheating on me for years now and he thinks he's entitled to play the saint? God, I just…" She swallowed hard and took a deep breath before continuing. "I hit him. Slapped him, actually, and he grabbed my wrist really hard and pulled me back…" She brought her wrapped wrist up between them; the pain had dulled to a faint throb now. "I thought he was going to hit me for a second there." She let out a sigh and shook her head. When she met his eyes, she was surprised (but not really) to see the murderous look he had in his eyes.

"I can't believe…" He started, but had to pause to swallow hard, pressing her body to his possessively. Kate leaned in and pressed her forehead against his jaw in an effort to calm him down. "I could kill him right now, Kate. He has no right to do this to you." He said through gritted teeth. "Did he hurt you?" He asked, touching her cheek gently.

"He pulled on my sprained wrist, so yeah. I just, I don't even want to look at him anymore, Rick. I can't. How is it that you can start to hate someone you once loved so much?"

"I don't know, babe. I don't know." He pulled her head back to look her in the eyes. "He doesn't deserve you, though. He has no idea what he's giving up on. No idea." He whispered, kissing her cheek, then trailing kisses on her nose, her eyes, her other cheek, until he found her lips, kissing her so gently that it bordered on reverently.

Kate wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, and brushed his bottom lip with her tongue, urging him to grant her entrance. His tongue touched hers and Kate felt the jolt of arousal all the way down to her toes as they played lazily against each other. She felt one of his hands cradling her cheek and the other wrap more firmly around her waist, pushing their hips together. She moaned and it was all she could do not to give in and have her way with him right then and there.

Pulling away, she smiled when she met his eyes, dark with need, and tried to catch her breath. He understood why she had to stop and loosened his hold on her, but still kept her in his arms. She rested her head on his shoulder again and let out a breathless sigh.

"I'm so glad I found you." She whispered in his ear, pressing a light kiss to his neck. He tightened his hold on her again and she felt him let out a breath as he kissed her forehead.

"Me too, Kate." He murmured. "Me too."

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I apologize for the delay in posting this chapter, but it has been a busy week. Thank you so much for all your feedback. I really enjoy reading all your messages and reviews and they just make me want to be a better writer. Really.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine, otherwise they would be making babies already.**

* * *

><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 7<strong>

"Rick!"

He turned around and smiled when he saw Alex running towards him. He bent down and reached out his arms to pick up the boy before he could crash into his legs. Scooping him up onto his hip, Rick offered his fist for Alex to bump his with. It had been a week since he had last seen the four-year-old (and his mother), but Kate had been busy finalizing the last details on renting the new apartment. It was the following Saturday and she had called him and asked if he was up to do some heavy lifting to help her move in.

"Hey, buddy. What are you doing out here?" He asked, ruffling the boy's hair playfully, eliciting a giggle. "Where's your mom?"

"She's right over there with Uncle Javi. We're moving to a new apartment today." Alex explained and pointed towards a blue van a few feet away. "I'm helping." He added proudly and Rick chuckled.

"Yeah? What are you helping with?" He grinned at the boy and started in the direction Alex had pointed toward. Before he could answer, though, they reached the back of the car and Rick couldn't contain the smile when he saw her.

What could he say, he had missed her a lot these past few days.

"Mommy, look who I found." Alex exclaimed excitedly, making Kate turn around startled.

"Hey." He said softly, aware that the Hispanic guy that was with her was looking at him curiously. She smiled when their eyes met, but frowned when she realized Alex was in his arms.

"Hey." She touched his arm gently and turned to Alex. "What have I told you about wandering off, young man?" She told her son sternly and Rick was suddenly grateful it was him who had found the boy and not someone else. "You can't just run away without asking me, you know that, sweetie." She touched his cheek and brushed his hair away from his eyes.

"Sorry, mommy. I just wanted to say hi to Rick." Alex apologized sheepishly. "I won't do it again, I promise."

"You'd better not." She pinched his nose playfully with a grin and turned back to Rick. "Thanks for coming. And for finding this little guy." She told him with a small smile and Rick had to fight the urge to pull her into his arms.

"My pleasure, Kate." He told her, a smile tugging his lips up.

"Beckett, where should I put this?" His attention was turned to the Hispanic guy next to Kate, who was holding a big box. Kate turned back to him.

"Oh, Espo, this is my friend Rick Castle." She introduced him, smiling when Alex laid his head on Rick's shoulder, his small hand playing with Rick's collar absentmindedly. "Rick, this is my partner, Detective Javier Esposito.

"Nice to meet you, detective." Rick offered his hand for the other man to shake, adjusting Alex more securely to his side.

"You too, man." The detective shook his hand firmly, balancing the box precariously with one arm. "Beckett?"

"My room, Espo." She told him with an amused roll of her eyes. "We'll be right up." She reassured him when he looked back unsure. Once he had entered the building, she turned back to Rick. "Hi." She smiled at him happily, wrapping her hand around his. He pulled on her hand, tugging her to his side.

"Hi." He whispered, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "Missed you." He added, nuzzling her ear.

"Missed you too." She smiled up at him, brushing her lips against his cheek. "Ready to do some heavy lifting?"

"Just point me in the right direction." He said, setting Alex on the ground again. "Alex will help me, right, buddy?" He nudged his shoulder and the dark haired boy nodded excitedly.

"Alright, boys, let's get to work." She shook her head at them, amused, and pointed out a box to Rick, while picking one up herself. "Come on."

* * *

><p>"So, Becks," Ryan interrupted her thoughts in the kitchen a few hours later.<p>

They had finally finished moving everything into her new apartment, and had ordered pizza in. Rick was in the living room with the kids and Esposito, listening intently to a story the detective was telling. Alex was sprawled against his side, asleep, after the excitement of moving in, and she knew Olivia wouldn't be far behind.

"Yeah?"

"This new friend of yours…" He started, looking back into the living room, making sure Rick was distracted. "What's the deal with him?"

"We met a couple of months ago. He's a good guy." She told him and opened the fridge to get a bottle of water, hoping he would just leave it at that.

"Is he treating you good?" He accepted the bottle she offered him, taking a sip, while she did the same from hers. "Do we need to have that talk with him?" He lifted an eyebrow at her and she rolled her eyes, capping her bottle.

"There's no reason to do that. I told you, he's a good guy."

"It's just that…" He took a deep breath before continuing. "We don't want to see you hurt again, Becks. That's all. I know it's none of our business." He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and she gave him a small smile.

"Really, you guys have nothing to worry about." She touched his arm reassuringly and he nodded. "But thanks." She said just as the doorbell rang. She offered him another smile, before grabbing her wallet from the counter and making her way to the door. She stopped when she saw Rick was already closing it, pizza boxes in hand.

"It's on me." He told her with a small smile, apparently knowing she was about to complain. "You can pay next time." He nudged her side and she narrowed her eyes at him. "Come on, everyone is waiting."

* * *

><p>A couple of hours later, Kate and Rick sat on the floor, backs against the wall, staring at the still mostly empty living room. She would have to buy new furniture since almost everything she had at the old apartment was Jake's and she had gotten rid of the furniture of her other apartment years ago. For now, she had a TV for the kids and a few chairs. Alex and Olivia were sleeping in the same room tonight in the one bed she had brought from Jake's and she had an air mattress to sleep on. She knew it was going to be hard for a while, but it was better than staying in that place where she no longer called it a home. She would have to tap into her trust fund once again to do some basic decorating in her new apartment, but that could wait until her next day off.<p>

For now, she was happy to be finally away from that godforsaken place, and, most importantly, away from Jake. Things had been getting increasingly worse and strained between them ever since he found out about Rick's existence. She never told him what kind of relationship she had with Rick, only said he was a friend and that it was none of his business. Even though it was really hypocritical of him to even accuse her of having an affair, she hoped he wouldn't make a big deal out of it when they finalized the details of their divorce.

"You're quiet." Rick commented, his arm pressed against hers. She turned her head to look at him and smiled when he took her hand in his, entwining their fingers.

"I'm just glad I'm finally here with the kids." She told him, resting her head on his shoulder, allowing her body to lean more fully against his side. Now that she was starting to relax, exhaustion was making its presence known. "Thanks for coming today." She rubbed her cheek sleepily against his shoulder and felt his arm moving to settle around her.

"You're welcome." He kissed her hair, lingering for a moment. "Your partners gave me a hard time earlier, you know?" He chuckled when she looked up at him, surprised.

"You're kidding." She hoped, but he shook his head. She let her head fall to his shoulder again, covering her face with her hands. "I told them not to do it, I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it, Kate. They're just looking out for you. I get it." He kissed her hair again, pulling her closer to his side. "It's good that you have friends like them who care about you."

"They tend to get a little overprotective sometimes. Since I'm the only girl on the team and all." Her hands traced circles on his jean clad thigh distractedly. "Especially with everything that's been going on with Jake."

"I know. They were nice about it, though. Didn't ask anything specific. Just told me to treat you right and take good care of you." He assured her, wrapping her small hand in his and bringing it to his lips. "And I told them I will. Cause I care too much about you not to." He added after a moment. She smiled and squeezed his hand.

"Right back at you."

She leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth. They had been trying their hardest to keep their relationship platonic, but there were times that physical contact was impossible to avoid, such as now. He cradled her cheek, his hand pushing her hair behind her ear, before pressing his lips to hers a little more firmly. She allowed herself to revel in it for a couple of minutes, keeping it chaste for the most part, and sighed contentedly, before pulling away. Resting her forehead against his cheek, Kate smiled when she felt his lips touch her temple.

"We're supposed to settle the divorce this week. Did I tell you that?" She broke the silence after a few minutes.

"No, you didn't. When?" He asked, running his fingers lightly up and down her arm, making her sigh happily. She was always like this around him these days.

He made her happy.

"Thursday morning." She settled against his side more comfortably. "Then it'll all be over. Hopefully."

"How's he been at home? He didn't hurt you anymore, right?" He questioned and she shook her head.

"He still thinks I'm cheating on him with you, which makes both me and him hypocrites, I guess. I saw him with his bimbo the other day near the courthouse. I don't feel right doing this, but…" She let out a breath and bit her lip.

"But…?" He prompted and she gave him a small smile.

"I can't help it. This?" She gestured between them. "It's stronger than me. Than us, I guess." She shrugged and he kissed her temple again.

"Kate, I don't want you to be uncomfortable. I told you, if you want me to back off, if you want space…"

"I know, Rick. I know. That's exactly the problem." She pulled away slightly, touching his cheek with her hand, her thumb caressing the skin under his eye. "I don't want you to." She told him before touching his lips with hers. "I guess it's that connection you used to talk so much about when we met." She teased and he chuckled, pulling her in for another kiss. "I like you. Too much to back away now, you know?"

"I like you too. A lot, Kate. So much that it scares me sometimes." He confessed and she smiled softly, caressing the shell of his ear. "But I want to do this right. And I know you do too."

"I do." She sighed again, nuzzling his cheek, placing a kiss to his jaw. "Guess we'll just have to settle for this for now. Stolen moments." She burrowed her face into the crook of his neck as he pulled her closer, pulling her legs over his.

"We'll figure it out." He whispered in her ear, running his lips over her cheek, trailing down to her jaw. "We'll be okay."

* * *

><p>Thursday morning rolled around before Kate had time to prepare herself for it. She woke up early after a night of rolling around in bed, dozing off a few times only to wake up with a gasp by some twisted dream her subconscious had managed to conjure up. Now she felt exhausted and, as much as she trusted that everything would be okay and that her turmoil would finally end, she couldn't help but feel apprehensive.<p>

The meeting was scheduled for 10am and Kate was out of bed by six, unable to sleep anymore. She made herself a cup of coffee and took a shower before waking the kids up for school. After dropping Olivia and Alex off, she came back home to get ready for the meeting. She decided to wear black slacks and a fitted white button down shirt with a nice suit jacket over it and her favorite power heels completed the ensemble. She needed to feel good, to feel powerful, in order to get through this morning.

When she got to Garrett Bishop's office, her lawyer was already there waiting for her and they had to wait another twenty minutes until Jake showed up with his own lawyer. They sat down at a conference room, Kate and her lawyer at one side and Jake and his lawyer – who Kate recognized as one of his buddies – on the other. Mr. Bishop exposed the case, presenting the documents for Jake to sign, allowing his lawyer to look them over.

"Are you in agreement with this deal, Mr. Caldwell?" Mr. Bishop asked after a few minutes and Jake shook his head with a humorless laugh.

"Well, I don't even want to get divorced in the first place, so I think we can all agree that this is completely against my will." He informed and Kate had to close her hands in tight fists to keep from punching the smug grin off his face.

"Really, Jake? You really want to keep living like we were, fighting all the time? In front of the kids?" She told him calmly, even if inside she was boiling with anger at his audacity.

"Kate, I've been telling you we can just live in separate places for a while. We already are. There's no need to get divorced. It's just going to damage your reputation and mine." He shrugged and Kate took a deep, calming breath.

"Mr. Caldwell, my client says there are irreconcilable differences between you two." Mr. Bishop countered, but Jake shook his head.

"My client states on record that he's willing to try harder in order to save his marriage." His lawyer, Ethan Davis, chimed in.

"That's a load of crap, Jake. You don't want this. We both know it. Let's just end it and move on with our lives." Kate insisted, running a hand through her hair. "It'll be better for us and for Alex and Olivia. You know that."

"You just want to keep them away from me. You think I don't see what you've been doing? How you already have someone else to replace me in their lives? I know they've hung out with that Rick guy again." He accused and Kate's eyes widened for a second, but she collected herself before she could give him an answer.

"Do you really want to do this, Jake?" She cocked her head to the side, leveling a cold gaze at him. "After everything you've done, do you really want to bring this up?"

"If it's affecting my kids, then hell yes, I want to bring this up. Whatever I've done, I've never taken the kids with me." He retorted and Kate felt like the air had been punched out of her lungs.

No, he wouldn't do this. He couldn't.

"Maybe we should take a breather, guys." Mr. Bishop suggested and they each retreated to opposite sides of the room.

Kate poured herself a glass of water and drank it thirstily, trying to calm her troubled heart at the eminent threat she could sense was coming. Ten minutes later, they adjourned to the conference table and Kate tried to project an aura of calm. Before her lawyer could say anything, however, Mr. Davis spoke up.

"My client agrees to the divorce on one condition."

"Alright, what is that?" Bishop prompted and Kate held her breath apprehensively.

"He wants custody of Olivia and Alexander Caldwell."

No.

Oh, God, no.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Loved all your reviews and death threats, guys, however weird that may sound. I'm really glad you guys are enjoying this as much as I am. This one is a shorter chapter because I felt like this part should stand on its own. Hope you like it.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine, otherwise they would be making babies already.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8<strong>

Kate felt like she had just been punched in the stomach. The second Mr. Davis announced Jake's condition, she felt oxygen being expelled from her lungs and a whole new incapability to breathe suddenly take over. She could hear her blood rushing loudly, implacable through her veins and a pounding headache made her close her eyes against the pain. And still, she couldn't breathe.

He was going to take her children away from her.

Oh, god, she couldn't breathe.

She felt her lawyer touch her shoulder and ask her something but she couldn't make out what it was. It felt like she was underwater and everything was happening in slow motion and the sounds that reached her ears were distorted.

He wanted to take her kids away. Her babies.

God, no.

"Detective Beckett," she finally heard Garrett Bishop's voice cut through the fog she seemed to be immersed in. "Kate, here, drink some water." Suddenly a tall glass of water appeared in front of her and she accepted it gratefully, taking a sip.

She felt an overwhelming need to cry.

"I…" She tried to say something, anything, but the giant knot taking residence in her throat was making it hard to even breathe. Swallowing hard, she pushed through. "I'm sorry."

"No worries, detective. This caught me by surprise as well." He gave her a sympathetic smile. "But we'll get through it. Your kids already live with you, right?" He questioned and she nodded. "We're going to keep it that way, alright?"

"Alright." She took a deep, shaky breath in order to calm down her still erratic heart. "What… what are my chances here, Mr. Bishop? And please, be honest."

"I'd say they're good. The only thing we have to worry about is your work hours, but I'm sure we'll figure it out."

Yeah, just what she thought. Her dangerous job with crazy hours was going to make her lose her kids. God, what was she going to do?

She thanked him and excused herself to leave. She needed to get out of that office, suddenly feeling claustrophobic, as if the walls were closing in on her. She still couldn't believe the son of a bitch had actually done this. He had told her he didn't want custody. What the hell was he playing with here? He barely spent any time with Alex and Olivia as it was. Did he really want to hurt her that much? So much that he would be willing to jeopardize their children's happiness along the way just so he could get to her?

This was ridiculous. If she didn't know any better, she would think this was his petty, childish jealousy showing through, but he didn't love her anymore – that much was clear. His long list of affairs only proved that further, so what the hell was he playing at?

Stepping into the elevator, she leaned her head back against the wall, closing her eyes and willing those stubborn tears to disappear. She would not cry. She refused to, at least for now. Jake had just left and the probability of her running into him in the lobby was still high. The last thing she needed was for him to see how much this had affected her. It was bad enough that he had seen her nearly catatonic state when his lawyer delivered the news. She hadn't even seen them leave.

Kate shook her head, fumbling through her purse in search of her phone. She needed to talk to Rick, hear his voice. Deep down, she knew how desperate and pathetic it all sounded, but at that moment she didn't care. He had been her rock through this and she needed him in whatever capacity was possible then. Finally closing her fingers around the device, she quickly scrolled through her contacts until she found his name and pressed the call button. It rang three times before he answered it.

"Kate," His voice was warm and that overwhelming need to cry returned with full force when she heard it. "How'd it go?"

"Rick…" She managed to get out, her voice shaking. She bit on her lip hard as the door opened and she stepped out of the elevator. She would not cry. She refused to cry.

"What is it? What's wrong?" He asked urgently and she had to take a deep breath to try and say something. "Kate, where are you?" He interrupted her attempt at saying something coherent before she could even try to.

"I'm leaving Garrett's office." Her voice was so small and laced with defeat. She suddenly felt her strength leave her and exhaustion started to take her over.

"Alright, I'm almost there. Wait for me. Okay?" He told her and she agreed with barely a whisper. "Hang in there, babe. I'll be right there with you."

She had to swallow hard at the endearment and felt the first tear escape her eye and slide down her cheek. Brushing it away quickly, she took a deep breath again, trying desperately to get her emotions under control. She couldn't let that bastard get to her. This was exactly what he wanted and she was just handing it over to him just like that. He wanted her emotionally unstable so he could just come in and destroy her life, but she was not going to let him do that.

Barely five minutes had passed when she felt someone touch her shoulder. Flinching away from it, she turned around startled.

"Rick."

His name spilled out of her lips with a choked sob and the next thing she knew, she was wrapped in his arms as he held her tightly. He let her cry it out for a few minutes, running his hands gently in soothing circles on her back. She felt like someone was squeezing the life out of her heart and her chest ached and she couldn't stop the tears that were rolling freely down her cheeks. She gripped his shirt tightly, holding onto him as if he was her lifeline.

"I'm sorry." She apologized after a few minutes and felt him shake his head, before placing a soft kiss to her forehead.

"Don't be." He told her gently, brushing the remaining tears away with his thumb. "Want to talk about it?" He asked and she pulled away slightly to look at him.

"He wants custody of the kids." She answered in a small voice, her throat closing up again. "That's his condition to sign the divorce papers."

"Oh, Kate." He pulled her into his arms again and she went willingly, craving his touch at that moment to soothe the pain in her heart. "We're not going to let him." He whispered against her hair. "Okay? We're going to fight for them. He's not taking them away." He pulled away and framed her face with his hands. "We're going to get through this." He murmured, kissing her tear stained cheeks.

"I just…." She had to stop for a moment and swallow hard. "I don't understand why he's doing this. He'd said he didn't want custody. But ever since he found out about you, he's been acting like a jealous son of a bitch. And he has no right to." She seethed out through gritted teeth. "He actually accused me of replacing him. That I was scheming to banish him from the kids' lives. It's ridiculous."

"Is he using me against you?" Rick asked, taken aback and she nodded. "Oh, babe, I'm so sorry. I never meant to cause so much trouble. I mean, if you want me to…"

"No." She shut him up with a finger to his lips. "Don't apologize for this. I don't…" She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before continuing. "I need you. I don't want to do this alone. I can't."

"Kate, hey," He brushed her hair behind her ear and gave her a small smile, seeming to have come to a decision. "_I'm in love with you._ I'm not going anywhere."

Kate looked at him with wide eyes, speechless.

"What?" She gasped, her heart hammering her chest.

"You don't have to say anything, Kate. I just, I wanted you to understand that I'm not going anywhere. I'll be there for you in whatever way you want me." He told her earnestly and she reached out to cradle his cheek, a warm feeling spreading through her from her chest out.

He was in love with her.

How did that even happen?

"You're entirely too good to me." She framed his face, his stubbly cheek scratching her palms, and touched his lips with hers in a chaste, but so layered kiss. "I love you too." She whispered, resting her forehead on his, feeling his warm breath tickle her chin.

"Yeah?" His smile was infectious and she felt her lips tug up in a wide smile.

"Yeah."

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: I'm really glad you guys liked that standalone scene, as I was really unsure about posting it like that. Thank you once again for your support and amazing feedback. You guys are the best.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 9<strong>

He watched them from afar, his hands shaking in anger when she immediately went into the bastard's arms the second he touched her. Just who the hell did she think she was to be cheating on him like this? She was his wife, goddamn it, _his wife. _The mother of his was supposed to act like one and fulfill her duty as such. Just because he had sought out other women in the past few years, it didn't give her the right to do the same.

He was a man. He had needs. And sometimes his wife just didn't cut it and he had to find others to meet those needs and desires. She had to understand that. And, god, she actually let the guy near his children. At least he had kept that part of his life sacred and never brought the kids along when he met one of his girls. Kate hadn't even respected that.

God, he really wanted to just march over there and punch the daylights out of this son of a bitch that had dared to touch his wife. Which part of married didn't the guy understand? She was taken and if he had anything to say about it, she would remain that way. He knew he had hit a nerve when he demanded the children's custody in exchange for the divorce and he was absolutely certain she would never go for that. If he said so himself, it had been a genius move on his part. He had only allowed her to move out because he had been sure she would come around eventually and would forget about this divorce nonsense.

He fisted his hands, gritting his teeth tightly when he saw her kissing that Rick person. _The bitch_. Apparently, she really thought she was going to get rid of him that easily; that she could just throw him away like he was a piece of trash.

Well, she thought wrong.

* * *

><p>"Thank you for coming." Kate whispered after they had been in silence for a few minutes. He still held her tightly, giving her strength and slowly calming down her heavy heart. Rick pulled away to meet her eyes, before closing the distance and kissing her lips for a brief moment.<p>

"Don't mention it." He told her softly, finding her hand that still gripped his shirt and entwining their fingers.

"How'd you even get here so fast?" She asked curiously, now that her mind wasn't so addled with so much pain.

"I have a meeting with my publisher in a few minutes so I was already on my way here when you called." He explained and she nodded, leaning forward so her head rested on his shoulder. "You okay?"

"A bit better, yeah." She sighed, closing her eyes. Right at that moment, all she wanted was to go home and curl around him in bed. "Garrett says we can fight for the kids. That my chances are good."

"You're a great mother, Kate. There's no way they're going to take Alex and Olivia away from you." He reassured her and she let out a heavy sigh. "Come on, how about we go get a cup of coffee, get you to relax a little?"

"I thought you had a meeting." She smiled, wrapping an arm around his neck, lightly playing with his hair. He shook his head and pulled out his phone.

"Gina, hey. Listen, something came up and I can't make it to the office right now. Rain check? In about an hour or two?" He quickly explained, his free hand brushing her hair behind her ear. "Okay, I will. No, don't worry. I'll be there." He said and hung up, pocketing his phone with a boyish smile. "All taken care of." He pulled away and took her hand in his. "Come on."

Rick took her to a nearby French Café and, for the next hour, he managed to distract her mind from the jumbled mess that her life currently was. When they walked back to the office building his publisher's office and her lawyer's were at, he kissed her again and they agreed to meet later that night at his place. He told her to take the kids with her since Alexis was actually going to be home tonight (and not out with her boyfriend or her friends for once) and she had been talking about seeing Olivia and little Alex again.

After parting ways, Kate made her way to her car and drove to the precinct. Now that Rick wasn't there to distract her, she felt that exhaustion seep into her bones and she felt her entire body ache with the heaviness of the stress she had gone through this morning. All she wanted right now was to go home and hide under the covers, hoping this was all a very vivid nightmare. But she knew this was the coward's way out and she wouldn't solve anything like that. So her best option now was to go to the Twelfth and distract herself with work until it was time to pick up her kids.

Then again, not everything about this morning had been bad. Rick actually told her he loved her. She still couldn't wrap her mind around it. He was in love with her and she was absolutely sure that feeling was so very mutual on her part. It was strange, really. They had known each for two months and, for the better part of that period, they had tried their hardest to not give in to the obvious connection they had. But despite that, they had fallen for each other, anyway, and it was just mind boggling for her. Because, really, they hadn't even had sex yet, they hadn't been on a date or even defined what the hell they were. And yet, they loved each other with a strength that quite honestly scared her.

It didn't matter, though. This was her fresh start. And she was going to make the best out of it.

* * *

><p>"Hey, Alexis." Kate smiled when the redhead opened the door to the loft. Alex was leaning against her leg, his little arm wrapped around her thigh while Olivia was nearly bouncing on her feet in excitement. Her daughter had really taken to Rick's kid and had been talking for hours how she couldn't wait to see the teenager.<p>

"Kate, hi." Alexis smiled back and stepped aside to let them in. "Hi, guys." She ruffled Alex's hair and smiled warmly at Olivia, who waved back enthusiastically. "Dad's in the kitchen. It's homemade pizza night." She announced and Kate nodded with a smile, taking her jacket off and then the kids' as well. "How do you guys feel about watching a movie after dinner?" She asked Olivia and Alex and reached out a hand to the little boy to encourage him to let go of his mother.

Alex sneezed a couple of times and Kate watched him take the teenager's hand with concern. The last thing she needed right now was for him to get sick. Walking in the direction of the kitchen, Kate smiled when she saw Rick working at their dinner and let out a quiet laugh when she saw what he was wearing. He looked up at her and his smile was so happy that she felt her feet carrying her body towards him without even realizing.

"Nice apron you got there, Mr. Castle." She teased when he pulled her against his body in a hug. He grinned and kissed her lips after checking that the kids were distracted choosing a movie.

"You like it?" He looked down at the black apron that said '_This is what a really cool Dad looks like' _with a grin and then back up at her. "Father's Day present last year."

"It suits you." She smoothed the fabric down his chest with a small smile. He stopped her hand with his and brought it to his lips. "How'd your meeting go?" She hopped up onto the counter and accepted the glass of wine he offered her.

"It was good. The new book comes out in a couple of weeks." He said while putting the pizza in the oven. "There's going to be a launch party on the 25th." He leaned against the counter next to her and put his arm behind her. "Will you come with me?" He asked a little timidly, his fingers doing a torturous slow dance on her hip.

"To your book launch party?" She asked, biting her lip when he nodded. "I would love to, really, but I'm not sure that's a great idea, Rick." She told him regretfully.

"Because of Jake, you mean?" He turned to face her, standing between her thighs. She nodded, brushing his hair away from his forehead affectionately. "You don't have to go _with_ me, you know. I'll take Alexis as my plus one. But I'd really love if you could come too, just as a guest." He leaned into her touch when she cradled his stubbly cheek. "Please?"

"The 25th?" She asked and he nodded, kissing her wrist gently. "I'll try my best to make it." She grinned when his eyes lit up. "Let's hope I don't have to work then."

"I'm going to have a serious chat with all the murderers in this city. Ask them to take the night off." He teased and she rolled her eyes amusedly. "After the party I'm going to have go on tour for about a week, though." He continued with a sigh and she felt her chest tighten already. "I wish I didn't have to."

"Where are you going?" She asked, trying to keep the disappointment at not being able to see him for a week at bay.

"Boston, Washington, Chicago and a couple of others. I can't remember them all." He rubbed his palms slowly on her thighs and she bit her lip at the shiver that ran through her because of his touch. He grinned at her, his eyes darkening. "Wish you could come with me." He whispered, brushing his lips down her jaw, smiling when he felt her gasp.

"Rick," She tried to say warningly, but it came out more like a groan. "We're not alone." She murmured when he captured her lips with his in a brief, but deep kiss.

"Right. I know." He took a deep breath, his hands coming to rest beside her hips, and she smiled at his fight to pull himself together.

Kate touched his chin and made him look at her. "Soon." She assured him with a kiss on the cheek and he nodded with a small smile, his eyes still dark with barely repressed lust. "Really soon." She added before pushing him away gently so she could get down from the counter. "Come on, let's see if our pizza is ready."

After dinner, they sat down with the kids to watch a movie in the living room. Kate tried to keep her distance from Rick while the children were in the room, but it proved to be increasingly difficult the further they got into the movie. They started out at a respectable distance from each other, but an hour into it, Kate found herself leaning against his side, trying her hardest not to give in and rest her head on his shoulder. The only thing distracting her from his proximity was the fact that Alex was leaning heavily on her and she thought he felt a little too warm.

"You feeling okay, baby bear?" She asked quietly so not to disturb the rest of the group. Alex looked up at her slowly, his eyes heavy and a little glassy with apparent fever.

"My head hurts, mommy." He told her and pressed his cheek to her side sleepily. Kate touched his forehead and sighed.

"What is it, Kate?" She heard Rick ask and turned to him for a moment, before turning back to her son, who was quickly falling asleep on her.

"I think he's got a fever." She said quietly, pressing a kiss to her little boy's hair. "Do you have thermometer?" She asked and he nodded, kissing her cheek before getting up.

"I'll be right back." He told her and she thanked him, looking down at Alex. He had fallen asleep. She pulled on his legs and maneuvered his little body so he was laying with his head on her chest.

"What's wrong, mom?" She heard Olivia's voice and looked down at her daughter on the floor with Alexis.

"I think your brother is coming down with a cold, Liv." She explained and Olivia nodded.

"You can put him in my room if you want, Kate." Alexis offered, concern clouding her young features. "So he'll be more comfortable."

"That'd be great, Lex. I just want to take his temperature first. See if he's really got a fever." She thanked the redhead and looked up to see Rick returning with a thermometer in hand.

"Here."

He handed it to her and she stuck it under Alex' arm, cradling his sleeping form while she waited for the device to announce the temperature. Rick sat down next to her again put his arm on the back of the couch, giving a shoulder a comforting squeeze. She offered him a grateful smile and sighed when the thermometer beeped.

"101.4." She sighed, running her hands gently over her son's arm. "Do you have some kids Tylenol?" She asked Rick, but he shook his head.

"Not anymore. Alexis takes the regular one now." He explained and Kate nodded, thinking she should go home to get some medicine in him. "I can run down to the drugstore and get some. There's one right around the corner." He offered and she looked at him with a small, appreciative smile.

"Would you?" She said and he nodded, leaning in to press a kiss to her forehead, before standing up. "Thanks, Rick."

"You got it, babe." He smiled at her and she bit her lip, trying to hide the small smile that wanted to break free. "I'll be back soon. You girls can go ahead and continue the movie." He told them, grabbing his wallet from the counter and made his way to the door.

When he closed the door behind him, Kate sighed, wondering how on Earth she had found such a caring man.

* * *

><p>His heart jumped when he saw the wife stealing son of a bitch walk out of the building. So this was where he lived, Jake thought to himself, positioning the camera to take a picture of the guy and the building's entrance. He could see Kate's car parked a few cars down and he knew she had been there for a while now. He had followed her home from the precinct and had decided to wait around for a little while to see if she was going out. It had been a little after six when she came down with the kids and drove here.<p>

He had had his suspicions that this was where this Rick guy lived and stuck around to see what time she was going home. It was a fancy building too and he wondered if the guy was rich. Now it was just past nine o'clock and she was still up there apparently. He wondered where the guy went at this time of night without her.

Sighing, he put the camera down and waited.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I am so sorry for taking so long to update. I had family over these past few weeks and then I was sick (still am, really), so I had no time to write. Hope you guys forgive me and that you like this one.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is obviously not mine.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10<strong>

"Hey, Rick. Come on in."

He smiled at Olivia as she stepped to the side to let him into the apartment. His relationship with Kate's daughter had been a slow one, but he thought that the young girl was finally warming up to him if her smile was anything to go by. He touched her shoulder affectionately on his way in.

"How's it going, Liv?" He asked, looking down at her. She shrugged, closing the door behind them, before leading him to the living room.

"I've got loads of math homework today." She sighed, rolling her eyes, exactly like her mother always did. "And I really don't like math."

"Yeah? I can give you a hand if you want. How's that?" He offered, smiling when the girl nodded enthusiastically. "Great, just let me know when you get to them."

"Thanks, Rick." She said happily, tucking a lose strand of her ponytail behind her ear. "Hey, mom! Rick's here!" She called out and Rick shook his head in amusement when she promptly turned on her heels and left in the direction of her room. "I'm going to get my school stuff." She called over her shoulder.

"What was that about?"

He looked up when he heard Kate's voice, smiling when their eyes met across the room. She was leaning against the doorsill that led to the kitchen with a small smile playing on her lips. He immediately made his way to her, pulling her into his arms. They hadn't seen each other in almost a week because Kate had had back to back high profile cases that had her working excruciating hours at the precinct.

"I'm helping with her math homework." He told her, leaning down to press his lips to hers. He loved that she fit exactly right under his chin when she wasn't wearing those ridiculously high heels she loved so much. "Hi." He whispered, pulling away, and felt her answering smile when her mouth followed his and they met again in a brief, but deep kiss.

"Missed you." She murmured, placing a final peck on his lips before pulling away.

"Missed you more." He retorted and she grinned, pulling him into the kitchen by the hand. "What are you making?" He asked, leaning against the counter as he watched her check whatever it was that she was cooking. "Smells great."

"Chicken casserole. It's my grandma's special recipe." Kate explained, turning off the stove.

"Any special occasion?" He asked curiously and she shook her head with a shrug, identical to what he had seen Olivia do just a few minutes before.

"Just… I like cooking. It's relaxing. I don't have to think a whole lot, you know?" She told him with a small smile, but he thought he could see her eyes shining with tears, something dark fleeting through it for a second. He was about to ask if she was okay, when he felt something colliding with his legs.

"Rick!"

He looked down and laughed when he realized there was a 4-year-old boy attached to his knees in a fierce hug. Leaning down, he scooped Alex up into his arms and tickled his ribs playfully.

"Hey, buddy." He lifted him up higher and blew a raspberry in his stomach, making the boy laugh loudly. "How's my favorite boy?" He asked, settling him back onto his hip.

"I'm good." Alex told him with a giggle. "Missed you." He confessed and Rick felt his heart skip a beat, a warm feeling spreading from his chest out when he looked from him to Kate. She was watching them with a small smile, biting down on her lower lip in attempt to hide it. He lifted an eyebrow at her, silently asking if this was okay, and she nodded, making her way to them.

"Missed you too, Alex. Who else is going to play with me if you're not around, right?" He said, brushing the boy's bangs from his eyes.

"Right!" The boy exclaimed and held his hand out for a high five, to which Rick quickly obliged. "I won the race at school today. It was really cool." He told him happily and Rick smiled when he relaxed into his body, resting his head on his shoulder.

"Why don't you guys go back to the living room and I'll let you know when dinner's ready?" Kate suggested when she saw Olivia walking into the kitchen with her school bag over her shoulder.

"You sure? I can help, if you want." He countered, but she shook her head with that small, pleased smile still playing on her lips.

"You'll help me more if you distract them. If you don't mind, of course." She added quickly and he shook his head. Silly woman, couldn't she tell that he was completely smitten with her kids?

"You got it. Miss Olivia and I have a date with her math homework right now, right, Liv?" He winked at the girl, who smiled with a nod. "Let me know if you need a hand here, though." He adjusted Alex in his arms and brushed a kiss on Kate's cheek.

* * *

><p>"God, I'm so tired."<p>

Rick smiled when Kate collapsed into his side on the couch. They had had dinner a few hours before and he had helped Olivia with her homework (which he thought had totally earned himself some awesome brownie points with the girl) and then Alex demanded his attention, to which he was more than happy to part with. It was closing in on 10pm now and Kate had finally managed to put both kids to bed for the night.

"Long day?" He asked, wrapping an arm around her to pull her closer to his side. She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder, turning her body toward his in an attempt to get more comfortable.

"Try long week. This was the case from hell." She groaned when he started to gently massage her shoulder. "Oh, this feels so good, Rick." Her pleased tone only encouraged him further.

"Come here." He directed her to sit between his legs as he leaned back against the arm of the couch, giving him better access to her back. "Better?" He asked quietly when he started massaging her with both hands.

Her answering groan made him take a deep breath in order to not pounce on her then and there. They had been skirting the issue for a while and he understood that she wanted to take things slowly because of how bad her divorce process was at the moment, but at times like these, when he could hear her moaning in pleasure because of his touch, it made things harder for him. Literally.

He worked on loosening the knots on her back with his hands for a few minutes until she was heavily leaning back against him, completely relaxed. He sighed, trying to think of nonsexual things, and pulled her back to him, wrapping his arms around her waist, against his better judgment. Having her so close only made it more difficult for him to hold onto his self- control.

Kate sighed and covered his hand with hers, entwining their fingers together, before turning her head to place a kiss to his neck, making him shiver. He felt her grinning against his skin as she pressed another kiss, sucking lightly on it. He tightened his hold on her – as a warning or as an encouragement, he wasn't quite sure – and felt her turn around in his arms.

"Thank you." She whispered, tugging on his earlobe with her teeth, before soothing it with her tongue.

"For what?" He asked, breathless, his hands travelling to her hips when she turned around fully in his arms and straddled his legs.

"Just… everything. Being here." She told him, trailing down kisses from his ear to his jaw. "I can't even begin to tell you how much it means to me."

"Right back at you, babe." He told her with a soft smile, cradling her cheek in his palm when she pulled away to look at him. Her answering smile encouraged him to close the distance and fuse his mouth to hers, tongues immediately clashing in a fierce battle for domination. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he let his hands roam her body, groaning when she pressed her hips against his. "God, you're driving me crazy, Kate." He said breathlessly, tightening his hold on her so her body was pressed tightly against his.

"Right back at you, babe." She was teasing, he knew, but the sultry tone in her voice gave her away, as she latched on to his neck again, making yet another shiver run deliciously through him. "But we should probably take this to my room."

"Right, right. Don't want to get caught by the kids." He mumbled and sighed heavily, resting his forehead on hers for a moment in order to catch his breath. She stood up and he watched as she offered him a hand, her hair tousled and lips swollen from his ministrations. He took her hand and stood up, immediately tugging on it to pull her back into his arms. Wrapping an arm around her waist, he touched her cheek with his free hand, making her look up at him. "Hey, are you sure you want this?" He asked quietly and she leaned into his touch, pressing her lips to his palm for a moment.

"I think we've waited long enough." She replied, wrapping her arms around his neck again, her fingers playing gently with his hair. "I want you. So bad, Rick." She leaned in and captured his lower lip with hers, sucking on it. He groaned against her mouth and deepened the kiss for a moment, pressing her body fully against his.

"What about the kids?" He pulled away slightly and felt her sigh. "They don't know about us yet, right?" He didn't want to make things uncomfortable for her or her children when he did the walk of shame in the morning.

"Olivia knows."

"She does?" He asked surprised and she chuckled, nodding. "How? When?"

"She asked me if you were my boyfriend the other day. Because she saw us kissing that day at your place."

"What'd you tell her?"

Kate sighed again and ran her fingers through his hair, gently massaging his scalp.

"I said that we care about each other a lot and that we were dating, kind of." She explained and he nodded, slipping his hand underneath her sweater again, his palm meeting her warm skin. "Cause we never really talked about this, so I wasn't really sure what I should say." She added quickly, fumbling with her words, and he grinned, leaning in to catch her mouth in a deep kiss.

"I don't care about labels, Kate. I love you." He told her in a fierce whisper. "That's more than enough definition of what we have for me. I'm in love with you and I'm not going anywhere."

"I think that's more than enough for me too." She told him with a happy smile. "And I love you. So much, Rick." She assured him and pulled him down for another deep kiss that made his head spin. "Come on." She kissed him once more, making him growl against her mouth when she pressed her hips against his in a deliciously excruciating dance. She pulled away after a minute, taking him by the hand and leading him to her bedroom.

* * *

><p>Sunlight filtered in through the open curtains in her bedroom and Kate covered her eyes with a hand, rolling to her side to burrow her face into Rick's neck. With a sigh, she stretched her body lazily, feeling a bit sore in places she hadn't been sore in a really long time. Smiling contently, she pressed a kiss to his skin, feeling his arm tighten around her, even in his sleep.<p>

He had been so attentive the night before, so perfect, catering to her every need. They were so in synch that at times it felt that he was reading her mind or even knowing what she wanted before even she did. She felt her skin tingle when she remembered all the amazing things he had done to her, how hard it had been to keep it down so they wouldn't wake up the kids.

She loved him. She really, really loved him, she thought with a happy grin.

Bracing herself to face the sunlight, she waited until her eyes adjusted to it and reached out to get her phone to check the time. Unlocking it, she groaned when she saw it was barely 7am and cursed her inability to sleep in. Then she checked the date.

It was May 25th.

Rick's book launch party was tonight. And her mom would be celebrating her sixtieth birthday today, had she not been robbed of her life that terrible night thirteen years ago. Sighing, Kate put her phone back on the nightstand and closed her eyes, feeling the sting of tears already trying to make their way out. In the whirlwind that her life had been in these past few weeks, she had completely forgotten about her mom's birthday and now she felt so incredibly guilty for it. She knew it was silly, that her mother would have understood if she had been alive, but it still hurt. And today, when all those happy memories of past birthdays assaulted her mind, it hurt even worse.

Because it didn't matter that thirteen years had passed. She still missed her mom and wished with all her heart that she could still be here; that she could've met Alex and Olivia, that she could tell her what the hell she was supposed to do now that Jake was being a selfish son of a bitch.

God, she just wanted her mom.

Taking a deep breath, she blinked the tears away, willing them to disappear completely when she felt Rick stir behind her. She stayed on her side, knowing he would seek her out like he had during the night before. Sure enough, she soon felt his arm scoot over her stomach as he nuzzled her neck, placing butterfly kisses on her skin.

"Morning." He mumbled against her neck, kissing it sleepily. She turned around in his arms and smiled when he grinned groggily at her, his hair sticking up in every direction.

"Morning, babe." She said, kissing his lips softly. "It's early."

"Time is it?" he asked with a yawn, making her do the same.

"A little after seven." She told him and he nodded, kissing her cheek as his arms pulled her closer. "Want to sleep some more?"

"Mhmm." He sighed and opened his eyes again when she touched his cheek. "You working today?"

"On call." She explained, burrowing her face into his neck again. It had fast become her favorite position to sleep in.

"Then let's sleep some more." He said, running his hand lazily up and down her back. "Cause someone didn't let me sleep much last night." He teased and she laughed, pinching his side playfully.

"I didn't hear you complaining, Mr. Castle." She pulled away to look at him with a smirk. He shrugged.

"I wouldn't object to not sleeping again, you know." He suggested, wiggling his eyebrows at her, making her laugh.

"Well, in that case…" She promptly closed the distance between them with a kiss and rolled him onto his back, so she could straddle him. "Let's do something a little more productive."

* * *

><p>"Are we staying over at Grandpa's, mommy?" Alex asked from the backseat.<p>

It was late afternoon and she was supposed to be at the launch party at 7. Rick had left a little after lunch today and things had gone surprisingly well with the kids. Olivia didn't ask any questions, but from the way she was acting towards Rick lately, Kate could tell that her daughter was finally accepting him and even liked to spend time with him. She had loved the way Rick had helped her with her homework last night and she had told him so this morning when they were having breakfast. Olivia had even asked him if he wanted to watch a movie with her while they waited for their lunch to get there.

Alex had been over the moon that Rick had stayed over. Kate was amazed at how taken her son was with him and how it seemed completely mutual as Rick went out of his way to play with the 4-year-old. After lunch, Rick had kissed her goodbye at the door – out of the kids' sight, of course – and they had agreed to meet later tonight at the party.

"Yeah, baby bear." She told him through the rearview mirror. "And I'll come pick you guys up tomorrow morning, okay?"

"Okay." She turned her attention back to traffic, but was startled after a few minutes by her son's voice again. "When is Rick coming home again, mommy? I miss him."

"You just saw him, Alex." She smiled at him quickly and turned onto her father's block.

"I still miss him." He said with a shrug. "Livvie does too." He added after a moment and Kate looked at her daughter through the mirror again.

"I like him." Olivia says with a shrug, making Kate smile.

"Alright. You guys are probably doing something with daddy tomorrow, but I'll talk to Rick so we can all get together soon. How's that?" She suggests after parking the car in front of her dad's building.

"Yay!" Alex exclaimed and Olivia giggled at her brother's antics, rolling her eyes.

"Come on, you two. Let's go see grandpa."

Locking the car behind them, she took her kids' hands and led them through the building's entrance, greeting Casper, the doorman, on the way in. They waited patiently for the elevator and Kate let Alex push the button for the 6th floor. When the door opened, Alex ran ahead, knocking on her dad's door excitedly. Kate shook her head and scooped her son up in her arms, fishing her keys out of her pocket and inserting it in the lock.

"Dad?" She called out, setting Alex down. "Dad, we're here." She called again, but there was still no answer. Thinking her father might be taking a nap, she started to make her way to his room to check on him, but Olivia's voice interrupted her. "What is it, Liv?" She asked, making a detour to the living room, where Alex and Olivia had run off to.

"Mom, Grandpa won't wake up!" Her daughter ran to her, scared.

"What do you mean, he won't wake up? Where is he?"

"On the couch. You've got to wake him up, mom." Olivia pleaded, her eyes already shining with tears.

With her heart heavy with dread, Kate rounded the couch to find her father apparently sleeping. It would seem normal, like he was just taking a nap.

Except for the empty vodka bottle on the floor.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: I'm so sorry about the ridiculously long wait for this chapter, but I have a really good reason this time. My mom's been in the hospital for the past week - she has a heart condition and needed to do a few tests - and well, given the content of this chapter, I tried not to think about it for a while. But I needed a distraction and I know you guys have been waiting, so I finished the half chapter I had already. It's not long and it just deals with the aftermath of Jim drinking himself into oblivion, but I hope you guys like it either way.**

**Disclaimer: Castle is obviously not mine.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11<strong>

Kate had no idea how she had ended up in the hospital. The span of a little over an hour that passed from the moment she found her father unconscious form on the couch to getting him to the hospital was a complete blur in her mind. She had had the presence of mind to call an ambulance and followed the paramedics to the hospital in her own car, since she couldn't ride in the ambulance with the kids.

Her father was rushed inside when they arrived at the hospital and she was directed to the reception to fill out the necessary forms with his personal information. She did it all on autopilot and, when she sat down with Alex and Olivia in the waiting room, she felt it all crashing down on her and she had to bite hard on her lower lip in order to keep from breaking down in front of her children. She tried to get a hold of Jake, so he could at least take the kids away from the hospital, but he never answered his phone, despite the five different messages she left for him asking him to call her back as soon as he got the message.

Her next call was to Rick and, when he picked up with that warm voice of his, she had to fight hard to keep the tears at bay.

"I won't be able to make it to the party tonight." She told him, but tried as she might, her voice still shook and he knew immediately that something was wrong.

"What happened, Kate?" He asked, concerned, and she bit on her lip, trying to keep her emotions in check, especially because Olivia and Alex were both watching her closely.

"My dad… we, uh" She took a deep breath when her voice wavered again. "We're at the hospital. When we got there, he was… we couldn't wake him up." She finished with difficulty and heard Rick moving around on the other end of the line.

"Where are you? Which hospital?"

"Rick, you don't have to do this. You're going to be late." She tried to dissuade him, but he was adamant.

"Kate, which hospital?" He insisted and she rattled off the address to him. "I'll be right there, alright? You guys okay? You and the kids?"

"Yeah." She whispered, looking at her kids. Alex and Olivia were sitting next to each other on the waiting chairs and Olivia was holding onto Alex's hand comfortingly. "I just need to find someone to stay with them. I can't get ahold of Jake."

"We'll figure it out when I get there. I'll see you soon, love. Just give me twenty minutes." He reassured her and she found herself nodding, even though she knew he couldn't see her, before hanging up.

"Mom?" She heard her daughter's timid voice and looked up again, meeting her scared, but steady gaze. "Is grandpa going to be alright?"

"I hope so, honey. The doctors are trying to make him better now." She reached out and touched Olivia's cheek. "But whatever happens, we're going to get through it together, okay?" She tried to reassure her and the girl nodded, looking down.

They stayed in that waiting room for the following thirty minutes and Kate tried her hardest to distract the kids and herself from what could be happening to her father inside that emergency room. She couldn't believe this was happening again. Her dad had been sober for nearly seven years. What could have possibly set him off again, upsetting him so much that had made him fall down head first into the bottle?

Then there was the fact that Rick was on his way there and she knew there was no way she could hide this from him. She had never told him what had happened to her mom, only that she had died years ago. How do you even begin to talk about something like this anyway, right? There was no way she could have casually mentioned that her mother had been brutally murdered and that her killer had never been caught. Not to mention the fact that her father was a recovering alcoholic because of it. Now a relapsing one, apparently.

God, what the hell had he been thinking? He had been doing so well lately. Sure, the fact that today was her mother's birthday was a possible factor, but, damn it, they had gone through several birthdays since he recovered without him drinking himself into oblivion.

"Kate."

His voice made her snap back into reality, her eyes immediately meeting his across the waiting room. He crossed the distance between them and met her by the chairs when she stood up. Pulling her into a hug, Kate felt her tightly held control start to break as a tear escaped her eyes. Burrowing her face into his neck, she tried to draw strength from him and keep her emotions in a tight leash again. She could not break down. Not now. Not in front of her kids.

"Kate, love." He wound his fingers through her hair in a soothing gesture and she finally looked up at him. "Hey, what happened? How's your dad?"

"He…" She closed her eyes and rested her forehead on his shoulder for a moment, trying to pull herself together. "He is an alcoholic. But he had been sober for years now. I don't know what happened, but we found him passed out at home, an empty vodka bottle on the floor." She said it all in one breath, wiping away a stubborn tear when she finished.

"What are the doctors saying?" He asked softly, brushing another tear away with his thumb.

"They haven't said anything yet. They're still working on him and they told us to wait out here." She sighed and leaned against him again, feeling her strength slowly leaving her body.

"Okay." He breathed out, pressing a kiss to her temple. "Let's sit here, then. Come on."

He guided her to the chair next to Olivia and made her sit down, taking his place beside her. Kate sighed and leaned against his side, reaching to her left to take her daughter's hand in hers. Her skin was cold with nervous perspiration and Kate tried to soothe her, giving her hand a comforting squeeze. Closing her eyes, she rested her head on Rick's shoulder and tried to breathe in and out slowly. She needed to have faith that everything was going to be okay, otherwise she would just fall apart right then and there.

Then she felt Rick shift next to her and opened her eyes, smiling when she saw that Alex was busy trying to crawl over to Rick's lap from the chair next to his. He looked at her, lifting an eyebrow in question, and she nodded, so he immediately pulled the boy into his arms and set him on his lap. Alex leaned back against Rick's chest and turned to his mother, slipping his small hand into hers.

"Grandpa's gonna be okay, mommy. I know it." He told her seriously and Kate nodded, tears welling up in her eyes again.

"I know, baby bear." She whispered and brought his hand to her lips, settling against Rick with a sigh. Releasing her daughter's hand, she wrapped an arm around Olivia and pulled her close to her side.

Right then, with three of the people she loved the most in the world around her, she felt like she could really believe that everything was going to be alright.

* * *

><p>"You're going to be late." She murmured a few minutes later, nuzzling his neck tiredly. It felt like she had been hit by a car, the way exhaustion was eating away at her.<p>

"I already called Gina and Paula on my way over here. Told them I'd be a little late because of a family emergency." He explained, brushing a his lips lightly on her hair. "I'm staying until we have something concrete on your dad's condition."

"Thank you." She said quietly, pulling away to look at him. He offered her a small smile and kissed her cheek, lingering for a moment. "I don't know what I'd do without you." She sighed, closing her eyes.

"Back at ya." He told her with a silly grin that made her chuckle and burrow her face into his neck with another sigh.

"Jim Beckett's family?"

The doctor's voice made Kate jump to her feet, making her cross the distance to the young man in scrubs and a white coat standing at the door before she was even aware of what she was doing.

"Yes, I'm his daughter. How is he?" She asked quickly, her heart galloping inside her chest.

"He suffered severe alcohol poisoning. We managed to stabilize him, but we'll have to watch him closely for the next twenty-four hours." He explained gravely and Kate swallowed, trying to dissolve the knot that had decided to take residence in her throat.

"Is he going to be okay?" She asked quietly, holding onto Rick's hand tightly.

"I believe so, yes. For now, we just need to give his body a chance to get rid of the alcohol on its own, so he's going to remain on a ventilator to help his breathing and we'll give him plenty of fluids. And hope that there is no lasting consequences." The doctor said and gave them a tired smile. "We're moving him to a room upstairs if you want to see him. If you have any questions, my name is Dr. Lucas and I'll be here until tomorrow morning."

"Thank you so much, Dr. Lucas." Kate shook his hand gratefully and he nodded.

"A nurse will come and get you guys soon." He told her and turned to leave. Kate sighed, relieved, and sagged against Rick's side.

"God." She choked out, tears finally escaping from her eyes. She brushed them away quickly so the kids wouldn't see her crying and felt Rick's arm wrapping around her body, pulling her to him.

"Hey, you heard the doctor. He's going to be okay." He whispered soothingly and she nodded, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah, I just... memories, you know? It's not the first time." She breathed, closing her eyes in order to pull herself together. When she felt she was somewhat in control of her emotions, she turned back to Alex and Olivia. "What do you guys say about hanging out with Uncle Javi and Aunt Lanie tonight?"

"Really? Can we, mom?" Olivia grinned, sounding more like her usual self. She loved Esposito's wife, Lanie. Kate was really good friends with her and they got together for lunch from time to time outside of work.

"I'll call them and see if they can come and get you guys for tonight." She brushed her hand through her daughter's hair and gave her a small smile. Alex looked down, his lower lip sticking out. "What's wrong, baby bear?"

"I want to stay with you and Rick." He protested, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Oh, Alex, it's just for tonight, sweetie. I have to stay with Grandpa and Rick has to go to work. And I can't get ahold of your dad." She crouched down to his level and touched his cheek as he looked at her stubbornly. "We'll come and get you tomorrow morning." She promised, after looking at Rick for confirmation. He nodded.

"How about we go get something to eat, Alex?" Rick offered and Kate squeezed his arm in reassurance that it was okay. "Liv?" He questioned her daughter and Olivia nodded.

"Alright." Alex sighed, still disappointed. Rick leaned down and picked him up, settling him on his hip, before offering his hand to Olivia, who took it without a moment's hesitation.

"Do you want anything, mom?" She asked Kate, who smiled gratefully at her little girl.

"A cup of coffee would be great, honey." She leaned down and kissed Olivia's cheek. Standing up, she touched Rick's lips with hers for a brief moment. "I'll text you his room." She murmured, leaning her forehead on his jaw.

"I'll distract them for a little bit." He said, breathing her in. "Love you." He added in a whisper and Kate smiled.

"Love you too."

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	12. Chapter 12

**At the end of the tunnel**

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><p><strong>Chapter 12<strong>

He fished his phone out of his pocket, rolling his eyes when he saw the caller ID. Kate. Again. Well, she could call as many times as she wanted, he was not going to answer. He was absolutely sure that she just wanted him to take the kids earlier than they had agreed to, so she could go to the fancy book launch party of that son of a bitch of a writer of hers. He was not going to play babysitter while she danced the night away with _him._

Who did she think she was, anyway?

Well, it didn't matter. He was going to that party himself to keep an eye on her. That is, if she managed to get someone to stay with the kids. It would serve her right if she didn't find anyone. She was a mother, a wife. It was not her place to saunter around town with a rich guy when they were still married. In fact, it was not her place to saunter around town at all. She was the mother of his children and his wife. She should start acting as such.

After all, he doubted she was going to fight him for custody of Alex and Olivia. They both knew she would lose if she tried. So he had nothing to worry about. Just had to give her time. She would come back to him. He knew she would.

Placing his phone on the nightstand, he rolled to his side and wrapped an arm around the blonde lying in his bed, placing an open-mouthed kiss to her neck.

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><p>Kate sighed, checking the time on her phone. It was close to midnight and she had been watching over her dad's sleeping form for the past five hours. She was exhausted and her entire body hurt, as if she had been hit by a truck. She still couldn't understand what could possibly have set her father into this out of control spiral into the bottle. He had been doing so well lately. Retired a few months before and he always said that he loved having more time to do the things he liked, spend more time with his grandkids. He had even taken to carpentry lately and would disappear to their cabin upstate for a few days every month to work on it.<p>

Pulling her knees to her chest, she rested her cheek on them and closed her eyes. It was no use, though. She had been trying to get some sleep for hours with no success. No matter how tired she was, it seemed that her mind would not just shut down and let her get some rest before she had to deal with whatever tomorrow brought.

Rubbing her eyes, Kate yawned and looked at her dad again. His heart was beating steadily and the machine was pumping oxygen into his lungs, so that his body could recover faster. Dr. Lucas had said that if all went according to plan, they would probably get him off the ventilator tomorrow. Hopefully.

Alex and Olivia had gone home with Esposito and Lanie for the night. She couldn't even express how grateful she was to have a partner like Javi, who had dropped everything to come to the hospital and take her kids in during this emergency. Olivia had been so excited so hang out with her Aunt Lanie, Kate thought with a smile at the memory. They had always gotten along, but things had been so busy lately that Kate had barely seen Javi's wife at all, even if their jobs did usually overlap.

Alex had held onto Rick until the last possible minute and Kate was torn when she made him say goodbye so he could leave with his sister. At the same time that she was elated that Alex was so fond of her boyfriend, she also worried that he would start favoring Rick instead of his dad. And Jake was pissed off enough as it was with the situation. Speaking of which, he had still not called her back, the bastard. Whatever, she would deal with him tomorrow morning when he came to get the kids.

Yawning again, Kate stretched her arms over her head, standing up to go get some water in the hallway. Walking towards her father's bed, she leaned down and kissed his forehead for a moment before making her way to the door. The harsh light of the corridor made her shield her eyes with her hand and she blinked several times in order to get used to the different lighting outside of the dark hospital room. Just as she was filling a plastic cup with water, she heard a familiar voice coming from the nurses' station just a few feet away.

"…waiting for me. I told her I'd come back." She heard his voice and smiled, shaking her head. "Come on, please? Let me just say hi, at least?"

"Mr. Castle, for the third time, visiting hours are over. I don't even know how you got this far." Nurse Yang told him patiently.

"The receptionist is a fan?" He said sheepishly, but it came out more like a question. Kate chuckled quietly and decided to put him out of his misery.

"I'll walk him out, Mrs. Yang. Don't worry." She smiled at the middle-aged nurse, who gave her a nod in agreement and went back to whatever it was she had been doing before Rick interrupted. "What are you doing here?" She asked softly when he turned to her with a smile, her hand involuntarily touching his lapel.

"I told you I'd come back after the party, didn't I?" He reached for her, caressing her sides gently and offered a boyish smile. "How's your dad?"

She sighed and drank the rest of the water, throwing the cup in the nearby trashcan. "Still asleep. Dr. Lucas said he's under some pretty heavy sedatives so his body can heal faster. He'll most likely be asleep until tomorrow morning at the very least." She explained and went willingly when he tugged her closer. "How was the party?" She asked quietly, breathing him in.

"Boring. Got out as soon as I could." He wrapped his arms around her and held her for a moment in silence. "How are you holding up?"

"I'm fine." She mumbled, closing her eyes. His heartbeat was soothing to her ears. "So glad you're here."

"Nowhere I'd rather be, love." He ran his hand through her hair gently and she sighed. "Have you eaten anything?"

"No. I stayed with him this whole time. Had to make sure he was really okay." She said quietly, rubbing her cheek sleepily on his shoulder.

"How about we go grab a late dinner downstairs? We won't be long." He suggested and she nodded, stepping away from his embrace. "Mrs. Yang?" She called out to the nurse, who looked at them with a raised eyebrow. "We're going to go get something to eat really quick. I'll be back soon, okay?"

"Don't worry, honey. We'll let you know if anything changes. You go get some fresh air with your man." The woman smiled kindly at her and, at that moment, reminded Kate so much of her own mother that she had to swallow hard and take a deep breath to control her emotions.

"Thanks. Can we bring you anything?"

"No, thanks, Kate. I'm all set here for the night." The nurse answered and Kate nodded, turning back to Rick.

"Shall we?"

"Sure." He kissed her cheek for a moment and took her hand in his, threading their fingers together. "Feel like eating anything in particular?" He asked when they entered the elevator.

"I'm not really hungry, to be honest." She answered, pushing the button to the first floor.

"But you've got to eat." He insisted, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"I know." She sighed and rested her head on his shoulder. "I think there's a diner just across the street. Maybe we can go there."

"Sounds good." He kissed her hair. "The kids okay?"

"Yeah. Espo is bringing them back here in the morning. Then I have to try to talk to Jake somehow. He's supposed to take the kids for the day."

"I can stay with you tomorrow, if you want some company. I only have to leave on Monday."

"Oh. Right. Your tour." She looked up at him and hoped he couldn't read the sadness and disappointment in her eyes. She needed him close so bad right now.

"I can try to postpone a few cities so I can come back every couple of days, love." He kissed her hair again and took her hand, pulling her out of the elevator and into the lobby.

"As much as I want you to, it's your job, Rick. You have to do it." She let out a breath and tried to offer him a smile. "We'll be fine." She squeezed his hand in reassurance, but he still looked torn. "Don't worry."

Tugging on his hand, she led him out of the hospital and they quickly crossed the street on the way to the 24-hour diner. She let him order their burgers and shakes and slipped into a booth on the very back of the place. Closing her eyes, she leaned against the window and wished hopelessly that this was all a nightmare and she would wake up soon in her bed with Rick.

She opened her eyes when she heard him coming back with their orders, settling a tray in front of her with a look that told her to eat up and not complain about it. He told her about the party while they ate and even managed to make her laugh several times at the antics of the fangirls that had been selected through a contest to attend the book launch party. When they were done, Kate leaned back on her side of the booth, her feet tangled with his under the table in a comforting warmth. He watched her for a beat, before leaning forward and placing his hand on the table, palm up in offering. She smiled and took his hand.

"Want to talk about it?" He asked quietly and she looked down, teeth worrying her lower lip. "You don't have to if you don't want to, you know." He added quickly, but she shook her head.

"Thirteen years ago, my mom was murdered." She said in a small voice, still unable to meet his eyes.

"Kate…" She heard the shock and concern in his voice, but she plowed through.

"They never caught who did it. Shelved the case as random gang violence." She let out a humorless laugh and shook her head. "My dad… he took it hard, you know? Turned to alcohol. I don't…" She stopped, took a deep breath. "I can't even remember him back then without a glass in his hand or being crazy drunk. I was still in college and had to transfer to NYU so I could take care of him." She let him pull her hand to his lips for a comforting kiss. "I remember that every day that I walked out that door, I was afraid that I would come back home to find him dead. I can't even tell you how many times this situation now happened back then. It was a struggle for years, until he finally recovered."

"How long was he sober for?"

"Nine years." She gave him a small smile. "He gave up the bottle when I found out I was pregnant with Olivia." She squeezed his hand and closed her eyes for a moment. "Every year on a few specific dates, things are always harder on us. My mom would have turned sixty today." She swallowed hard and brushed a tear away quickly. "I miss her. So much. I still don't know what to do when he's like this." She said in a fast whisper, her voice strangled by the overwhelming need to cry.

Rick let go of her hand and circled the booth, slipping into her side. "Oh, Kate." He pulled her to him, running his fingers through her hair soothingly. "Honey, I'm so sorry. I can't even… God, I don't even know what to say right now." He said against her hair, placing a kiss to the top of her head.

"Not your fault." She sniffled against his chest. "It was a long time ago. I just can't believe that today of all days…" She shook her head and pulled back to look at him. "She would've loved meeting you. She loved your books."

"Really?" He said, genuinely surprised and she nodded with a watery smile. "I'm sure I would've loved meeting her too."

"She was the one who pestered me to read _In a hail of bullets _in the first place." She told him and he smiled proudly. "Good thing she did. I couldn't stop after that. Read every single one. Multiple times."

"Really? You like my books that much?" He said, still amazed. "Why didn't you say anything? I mean, I saw a few on your bookshelf, but I never thought…"

"They inspired me. Gave me an escape from my horrible reality back then. Justice was always served. There was always a happy ending." She shrugged. "And I like mysteries." She grinned weakly and he smiled, touching her cheek before catching her lips with his.

"Thank you for telling me all this. I wish…" He let out a heavy sigh. "I wish there was something I could do to help. To make it better for you and your dad."

"Just being here helps." She leaned in and touched his lips with hers. "More than you know."

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><p>The next morning, Kate woke up early. Rick had dropped her off at the hospital around 1am with the promise that he would come back first thing in the morning to stay with her. Her back was now killing her from sleeping on the uncomfortable tiny couch, but her first action of the day was trying to call Jake again.<p>

This time he answered.

"Miss me, Katie?" He answered in a smug tone and Kate rolled her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Where the hell have you been? I've been trying to reach you since yesterday afternoon." She nearly growled into the phone and he chuckled. Honest to god _chuckled_.

"I know. I saw your half a dozen missed calls. But it was too late. What's up?" He said lightly and Kate let out a breath, trying to keep herself calm to handle this conversation.

"What's up is that I needed you to get the kids. My dad is in the hospital." She told him in a harsh whisper.

"Oh." At least he had the decency to sound somewhat ashamed.

"Yeah. Oh. I had to ask Esposito to take them for the night and he's driving them back here soon. So I need you to come get them here at the hospital instead of the apartment." Her tone was clipped and she was holding on to her last thread of calmness and balance.

"Uh, sure. I was getting ready to get them, anyway. Which hospital are you at?" He asked and she told him the address, saying she would wait for him in the lobby downstairs. "I'll be there in twenty. And, Kate? I'm sorry. Hope Jim is okay."

"Yeah." She said and hung up.

Standing up, she took a moment to stretch her body, feeling her joints pop loudly for a second. Laughing quietly to herself, thinking she was getting old, she made her way to the bathroom to brush her teeth and decided to go to the diner across the street to get some decent coffee. She checked on her father, kissing his forehead lovingly again before leaving. Waving hello to Mrs. Yang, she told her she was going out for coffee and that she would be back soon.

Once she made it to the diner, she decided to buy some pastries for the kids and for Rick. She knew he was partial to brownies and picked a large piece for him, asking the kid behind the counter to get it all to go. Balancing her coffee cup and a bag full of pastries, Kate crossed the street and smiled when she saw Rick walking up the steps to the hospital's entrance. Calling out to him, her smile grew when he walked down to meet her halfway.

"Hi." He said happily, taking the bag from her hands to help her and leaned down to kiss her.

"Morning." She whispered against his lips, wrapping her bag free arm around his neck. "You're here early."

"Didn't want you to be alone for long." He pushed a rebellious strand of her hair behind her ear. "And I missed you."

"Missed you too." She sighed and kissed him again. "Come on, the kids and Jake will be here soon and I want to have some breakfast first." She told him and took his hand, pulling him up the stairs behind her.

"Did you get some sleep?" He asked as they crossed the entrance to the lobby.

"A bit, yeah." She told him with a small smile.

"Mom!" She heard a childish voice call out and looked up in time to see Olivia running towards them, followed by Alex. The girl crashed into her and wrapped her arms around her hips.

"Hi, sweetie. Did you have fun at with Uncle Javi and Aunt Lanie?" She leaned down to kiss her hair and frowned when she saw that her daughter's blue eyes were filled with tears. "What's wrong, Liv?"

"I had a bad dream. Is grandpa okay?" She asked tearfully and Kate hugged her tighter.

"Oh, baby. He's fine. Still sleeping, but he's going to be just fine, alright?" She brushed a stray tear away with her thumb. "It was just a dream."

"It was so bad, mom. I thought for sure he died." She sniffled, leaning against Kate.

"It was a just a dream, Liv. We're all okay." She reassured her little girl before turning to Alex, who had finally reached them. "Did you have a good time, baby bear?" She asked with a small smile and the boy nodded, already holding his arms up for Rick to pick him up.

"But I missed you and Rick a lot, mommy." He said, getting comfortable in Rick's arms, resting his head on his shoulder. She shook her head, amused, and leaned in to kiss his nose playfully.

"We missed you too. Both of you." Rick told him and Alex smiled at him happily.

"You did?" He asked and Kate nodded.

"We sure did, buddy. I miss you all the time." She brushed his hair away from his eyes lovingly and turned back to Olivia. "Where's Uncle Javi?"

"Right over there." Olivia pointed to the elevators, where Esposito was talking to Ryan. "Hey, look. Dad's here." She added and Kate turned to the direction she had pointed, surprised.

Sure enough, Jake was there. And he didn't look happy.

At all.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Yes, I suck at updating, I know. Life got in the way, I didn't have any inspiration to write, you name it. But I am back and I'll be working on this one and on "Through the Looking Glass" as well. Hope you guys are still interested.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 13<strong>

He felt his blood boiling with anger in his veins. The son of a bitch dared to be here with _his _family, holding _his _son in his arms; like he had any right to get anywhere even remotely close to his children. What the hell was this guy thinking he was, anyway? And, _Kate._ She just stood there, letting it happened, letting this goddamn wife-stealer just take over her life like this.

God, he felt like beating the shit out of this guy just for the nerve of him.

Taking a deep breath, he made his way to where they were all standing, and felt his anger rise even more when Alex just relaxed into his arms like he was his father, like he, Jake, didn't even exist. This was just the last straw.

"Hi, Dad!" Olivia smiled at him, but her happy expression faltered when she saw the murderous look on his face. He couldn't even bring himself to feel bad for scaring his little girl.

"Hi, Jake. Thanks for coming." Kate nodded at him and he nearly growled at her.

"Hi, Daddy!" Alex waved at him from the wife-stealer's arms and he had to resist the urge to force him to put his son down immediately so he could take a punch in the face like a man. He looked sleepy and immediately rested his head on the man's shoulder again.

"Hi, buddy." He managed to get out through the red haze of his anger.

"This is my friend Rick." The little boy introduced and Jake closed his hands in tight fists.

"Oh, so this is the famous Rick I've been hearing so much about." He snarled, unable to keep the animosity from his voice.

"Jake, don't." He heart Kate's warning, but decided to ignore it. This was his chance. He turned to Rick.

"No, no. I have been dying to meet you, Rick. My kids can't stop talking about how _awesome_ you are. In fact, it seems they spend a hell of a lot more time with you than with me. And I'm their _father._" He watched as Rick shared a look with Kate, like they were having a goddamn conversation without words.

God, they made him sick.

"Jake, don't do this. Don't make a scene. Not in front of the kids." Kate interrupted, but he shook his head.

"You don't get to say anything, Kate. This is between me and him." He said with venom dripping from his voice.

"Would you stop doing this? Look around you, Jake. You're scaring the kids." She moved between him and the stupid son of a bitch, who was still holding his son. Did he not get the hint or was he just plain stupid?

"Stay out of this, Kate."

"Hey, what's going on here?" He heard her partner's voice and turned around to see the Hispanic detective making his way to them. "Beckett?"

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><p>Oh, thank God, Kate thought when she heard Esposito's voice. For a moment there she had thought Jake was about to attack Rick, not caring that he was holding Alex at all. Seriously, this weekend just couldn't get any worse.<p>

"It's nothing, Espo. Jake was just _leaving_, weren't you?" She glared at her ex-husband, but he remained still, like a furious statue, glaring at Rick. "Jake."

"What?" He hissed at her and she rolled her eyes at his stupid attitude and turned to Olivia.

"Liv, I'll see you and your brother tomorrow, okay?" She brushed her daughter's too long bangs away from her eyes affectionately.

"I don't want to go. Not when he's like this, mom." Olivia protested in a whisper. "I don't want to go."

"Honey, your dad is upset, but you guys have nothing to do with it, okay? I promise." She tried to reassure her little girl, but Olivia shook her head. "Jake, stop it. Look what you've done." She lowered her tone for the last part. "Your daughter is scared. Her grandpa is in the hospital and her father is making a completely unnecessary scene. Knock it off, take the kids and we can talk like adults when you cool off."

Jake seemed to snap out of it and looked down at Olivia, who was staring up at him hesitant and scared. Then he looked up at Alex, who was still clinging to Rick like his life depended on it and sighed. Maybe he's just realized what a huge mistake he has just made, Kate thought, shaking her head.

"Come on, guys. Let's go." He told the kids, but both Olivia and Alex stayed put. "Olivia, let's go. Now." He told her sternly and grimaced when he saw his daughter flinch and take a step back, closer to Kate.

"Liv, honey, go with your dad. You can call me any time you want, okay? And I'll see you tomorrow morning, bright and early." Kate knelt down to her daughter's level and touched her cheek.

"But what about grandpa? I want to see him." She protested, tears welling up in her eyes, and Kate found herself at a loss of what to do. "Please, mom. Let me stay."

"Grandpa is still sleeping. The doctors gave him some medicine to make him better, but he needs to rest and sleep a lot. Maybe tomorrow, if he's awake, I'll bring you up to see him. How's that?" She told her little girl, who nodded grumpily, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

"Okay." She said with a pout, looking down at the floor. Kate sighed and kissed her cheek.

"Come on, give me a hug, so you can go." She opened her arms and Olivia stepped into her embrace, hugging her tightly. "I love you, bug."

"I love you too, Mom." She held on tighter to her mother. "What if he gets really, really mad?" Olivia whispered into her ear and Kate felt a knot close up her throat as tears threatened to escape her eyes.

"You call me immediately. Okay? And I'll come pick you guys up." She murmured and felt the girl nod over her shoulder. "But nothing is going to happen, sweetie."

"Okay." The young girl sighed and turned to her father. "Let's go, dad."

Kate sighed in relief and stood up. Crisis number one averted. Turning to Rick, she smiled softly when she saw that Alex was still in his arms, completely relaxed with his head on Rick's shoulder. Now, onto challenge number two: making Alex leave Rick's side.

"Baby bear, it's time to go with daddy."

She touched his back and tried to smile at Rick when he looked at her with concern. She just shook her head and quickly touched his arm to reassure him and to try and find some strength to get through this. Alex looked at her and shook his head, holding onto Rick tighter.

"Alex, buddy." She heard Rick say quietly. "You have to go with your dad now. He's waiting for you."

"But I want to stay with you and mommy." Alex complained in a whisper, apparently getting the idea that it was a secret everyone else wasn't supposed to hear.

"We can hang out tomorrow or some other time, okay?" He reassured the boy, who sighed in defeat.

"Promise?" Alex asked softly and Rick nodded, smiling at him.

"I promise, buddy. But you need to go with your dad right now." He told him and put him down on the floor. This time Alex didn't complain.

"Alright." He sighed again. "Bye, mommy. I love you." He hugged Kate's legs and she smiled down at her little boy, running a hand through his dark hair.

"I love you too, baby bear. Be good to your dad, okay? I'll see you tomorrow." She crouched down to his level to give him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. He hugged her back, then made his way to Jake. When they were leaving, Alex turned around and waved.

"Bye, Rick!"

The writer waved goodbye and Kate groaned, covering her face with her hands. A few seconds later, she felt Rick's hands on her shoulder and looked up at him with wry smile.

"Sorry about that." She leaned back against his chest and felt herself finally starting to relax when his arms encircled her waist.

"Don't worry about it." He kissed her temple comfortingly.

"The guy is a total jackass, Beckett." Esposito chimed in and she laughed.

"You can say that again. He's gone completely crazy since he found out about Rick. It's ridiculous." She said frustrated.

"I thought he was going to punch the hell out of you, man. Alex in your arms or not. He looked _that_ crazy." The Hispanic detective told Rick and he nodded.

"Not much I could've done, right? He is already using me against Kate. I couldn't make things worse." Rick shrugged and Esposito nodded with a chuckle.

"True, true." He turned to Kate and touched her arm. "How's your dad? Any better?"

"Still sleeping, as far as I know." She told him and covered Rick's hand with hers, threading her fingers through his. "Listen, Espo, thank you so much for taking the kids in last night. Really. I don't know what I would've done without you."

"Hey, no problem, chica. You know we got your back, right? If you need anything, just say the word." He smiled at her and she nodded in thanks.

"I know. You guys are the best. I really appreciate it."

"And if that son of a bitch starts harassing you guys again, you can count on me to bust his ass. I was a witness to the little show he put on here just now." He said fiercely and she smiled at him. "Anyway, I should go. Good to see you, man." He shook Rick's hand.

"You too. Thank you for looking out for Kate like this." Rick told him earnestly and Kate squeezed his hand in appreciation.

"You got it. You do your part too and we'll be good." He narrowed his eyes playfully at Rick, who chuckled with a nod. "I'll see you Monday, Beckett."

"See you, Monday. Thank Lanie for me." She called after him and he nodded, waving goodbye at them. "God, this day just couldn't get any worse." She groaned, turning around in Rick's arms to wrap her own around his waist, and rested her head on his chest. "I'm really sorry he said those things to you."

"I told you Kate. Don't worry. He's trying to get to you by doing that. I can take it." He leaned down and kissed her lips.

"You're too good to me, Rick. To me and to my kids." She whispered and kissed his lips again, lingering on his bottom lip for a moment. "Love you."

"Love you too. Now let's go see if your dad is awake. Come on."

He took her hand in his and started leading her to the elevator. She went willingly, praying that this day didn't get any worse.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: You guys are the best! Thank you so, so much for your amazing reviews and alerts. What I love about you guys, readers of this story in particular, is that your reviews are always so detailed and exciting. They just make me want to write more. So really, thank you from the bottom of my heart. For those of you who asked whatever happened to the person I based Kate's character on, she's doing okay. Still got a long way to go emotionally, but she's a lot better. It's my big sister, actually, and Alex and Olivia are based on my wonderful nieces, who are the absolute light of my life.**

**Anyway, hope you guys like this one!**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 14<strong>

"How long have your mother been letting that guy hang out with you two?"

Olivia heard her father's voice and how it still resonated with repressed anger. She wasn't really sure what the problem was, but it seemed like her dad _really_ didn't like Rick. Which didn't make any sense because Rick was really nice and her dad didn't even know him. How could he treat someone he didn't even know in the first place so badly?

"A couple of months, I think. Why, dad?" She asked, leaning forward from the backseat to be closer to him.

"I don't want you around him. Neither of you." He said in a clipped tone and Olivia sighed. She just couldn't understand. Why was he so mad at Rick? Was he jealous because he was her mom's boyfriend now?

"Why not? Rick is really cool." She protested, but he glared at her through the rearview mirror. "What, he is!"

"I don't care. You are not going to be around him anymore and that's final, Olivia." He told her seriously and she frowned in confusion. "I am your father and you are going to do as I say."

"But I like him. And so does mom, so I don't see any problem in hanging out with him when mom hangs out with him too." She retorted and grimaced when she saw her father gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were all really white.

"I like Rick too. He's the best!" Alex chimed in from his car seat in the back.

Olivia touched his knee and shook her head at him to try and get him to shut up. He was only going to make dad even angrier and she was afraid of what could happen if he got really, really angry. After all, she had already seen him really angry at her mom and she had thought he was going to hurt her a few times, especially that one time when her mom had sprained her wrist. She had been listening in on their conversation and saw when he pulled on her sprained wrist and how her mom had been in pain for the rest of the day after that.

"Why exactly is he the best, Alexander?" He asked quietly and Alex frowned in confusion.

"Why are you calling me Alexander, daddy? Did I do something bad?" Her little brother asked, confused. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!"

"I asked you a question, Alexander. Why do you say Rick is the best?" Olivia flinched at his tone and felt bad for her little brother. He was still too young to understand what was going on. _She_ was almost 9 and she couldn't really understand, let alone 4-year-old Alex.

"Well... he is really, really nice and he plays with me all the time and he tells the best stories." Alex replied quietly, his voice so small. He sounded afraid and confused and Olivia didn't know what to do.

"Is that so?" He nearly growled and Olivia gasped when she saw a tear escape her brother's eyes. Releasing her seatbelt, she scooched over to her little brother. "Olivia, what the hell are you doing?"

"Alex is crying, dad. You made him cry!" She exclaimed defiantly, reaching out to hold Alex's little hand in hers. With her other hand, she clicked the seatbelt back into place around herself. "There. Happy now?"

"Watch your tone, young lady! I'm your father!" He snapped at her and she held onto her brother's hand a little tighter, warning him to be quiet. "You will not see this Rick person anymore and that's that. End of discussion."

The rest of the trip was made in silence.

* * *

><p>"He's awake." The nurse told Kate when they reached the door to her father's room.<p>

"Oh, thank God!" Kate sighed in relief and felt Rick squeezing her hand comfortingly. "Is he okay?"

"Seems to be. He's fighting the vent, so I'm going to get Dr. Lucas to see if we can get him off of it." She explained with a kind smile and Kate nodded.

"Thank you. Can we see him?" She asked, leaning against Rick's side. Now that it was almost over, she felt like she had just been run over by a truck, she was so exhausted.

"Sure. Go right ahead." The nurse said and left in search of the young doctor. Kate was about to go in when she felt Rick pulling her back.

"What's wrong?" She turned to him with a confused frown. He tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear gently.

"I should wait out here. Give you guys some privacy." He told her quietly and she nodded in agreement. "I mean, he doesn't even know me."

"Yeah, you're totally right. I'll come find you in a little while, okay? Are you staying?" She asked, threading her fingers through his. She couldn't get enough of his touch, no matter what the situation was. It calmed her down, gave her strength. It was amazing.

"Of course." He smiled and leaned down to press his lips to hers in a loving kiss. I'll go down to that diner we went to last night. Eat my brownie." He showed her the bag with the treats she had gotten for him and the kids with a grin, making her chuckle.

"Alright. I'll see you soon, babe." She told him, stealing one last kiss, before turning back to the door and taking a deep breath. She could do this.

Her father looked so small in that bed, now that it was broad daylight outside. So defenseless. His eyes followed her as she walked into the room and she swallowed hard when she met his gaze, the tears about to fall.

"Oh, dad." She said quietly, but the sob that she had been trying so hard to contain escaped and, just like that, the floodgates were open. She rushed to his side, held his hand, bringing it up to her lips for a reverent kiss. "Oh, daddy." She sobbed when he brushed her tears away. "I'm so glad you're okay. So glad."

The look in his eyes was killing her. He looked so sad, so guilty. Before she could say anything else, Dr. Lucas walked in.

"Hey, Mr. Beckett. Good to see you're awake." The young doctor said with a smile. "I'm Dr. Lucas and I saw you when you came in and have been following your care since then."

"Is he really okay, Dr. Lucas?" Kate asked, brushing her tears away with the back of her hand.

"Nancy says he's fighting the ventilator, so he probably doesn't need it anymore." He told her and turned back to her father. "Let's get you off that thing, huh? Ms. Beckett, if you could wait outside a little bit while we do this procedure."

"Yeah, sure. I'll be right outside, Dad."

She left the room and leaned against the wall outside, letting out a heavy sigh. Another tear escaped her eyes and she brushed it away angrily. Now was not the time to break down. She needed to be strong for her father, for her kids and for herself. But, _God_, things were just so hard right now and she just felt like crap, completely overwhelmed by the giant mess her life had become. The only good thing in her life right now, besides her children, was how amazing Rick was to her and how much she loved him and was loved by him. Their relationship was so effortless, that she was almost afraid that it was too good to be true. But it was too late now, anyway. She was all in.

"All done, Ms. Beckett. You can go back in now." Dr. Lucas' voice startled her out of her thoughts. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I..." She cleared her throat and took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm fine. Thanks. Is he okay?"

"Things are looking up right now, but I still want to keep him here another 24 hours for observation." He said and she nodded, offering her hand for him to shake.

"Thank you so much, Dr. Lucas." She said honestly and he smiled at her, shaking her hand.

"You're very welcome. Now go on. Go see your dad." He encouraged her and she smiled back.

Entering the room again, she found her father sitting up, his bed reclined into a sitting position, and sipping something from a cup with a straw. When he saw her, she offered him a small smile and quickly crossed the distance to his bed. Reaching out for his free hand, she brought it to her lips again, saying a quiet prayer in thanks for her father's life.

"Katie..." His voice was raspy and it came out like a whisper.

"No, dad. Don't try to talk right now. It's okay." She squeezed his hand and brushed his hair away from his forehead gently. "I'm so glad you're okay, dad. I was so scared. We all were."

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I don't know what came over me." He rasped, but she shook her head.

"Dad..."

"No, let me get this out." He took a deep breath and started coughing. "I got the bottle as a gift from a friend. He didn't know." Kate rubbed his back when he started coughing again. It took him a few seconds to catch his breath. "It had been sitting there for weeks. Then it was your mom's birthday and it had just been our 35th anniversary a week before." He sighed, suddenly looking so much older and exhausted. "And I've been so worried about you and the kids. It was suddenly all too much." He started coughing again and this time Kate interrupted him.

"Dad, don't." She touched his cheek and offered a small, sad smile. "We can talk about this later. Right now, I just want you to get better. Okay?" She said and he nodded. Kate felt her phone vibrate in her back pocket and pulled it out, smiling when she saw Rick's name on the screen. It was a text message, saying he was at a café down the street and not at the diner.

"Who was that?" Her father asked curiously and Kate felt herself blushing slightly.

"It's, uh..." She cleared her throat and looked down at her phone again, worrying her bottom lip with her teeth. "I've been seeing this guy, Rick Castle, and..."

"Like the author your mom loved so much?" He interrupted and she found herself chuckling.

"Yeah, dad, that's him." She smiled at her father and was so relieved to see him smiling back.

"He must be making you very happy if he puts a smile like that on your face." He squeezed her hand gently, still smiling.

"Yeah, he is. He's been amazing through this whole thing, dad." She pulled a stool next to the bed and sat down. "He's waiting down the street for me."

"Oh, do you want to go see him? I don't mind."

"No, no. I'm staying right here with you." She told him and sent Rick a quick text that she would still be a little while. "Not letting you out of my sight, Mr. Beckett." She narrowed her eyes at him playfully and he laughed quietly.

"How long have you guys been together?"

"A couple of months. We were friends first, you know. He's been helping me with this whole mess with Jake. He was the one who recommended Garrett Bishop." She told him and saw the flash of recognition in his eyes.

"Your lawyer?" He asked and she nodded, brushing her thumb gently over his hand.

"Yeah." She smiled at him and sighed. "The kids love him. You should see Alex around him. It's like Rick is his hero." She chuckled, remembering how attached to her boyfriend her little boy was.

"Do they know you're together? How are they handling not living with Jake anymore?"

"Liv knows. Alex just goes with the flow. But they met him way before we got together." She let out a heavy sigh. "I think they're okay. Getting used to it, I guess. Jake is the one who's been a problem lately."

"When hasn't he been a problem?" Her father said dryly and she laughed. He had never really liked Jake.

"I told you how he wants to fight for their custody, right?" She said and he nodded. "Now he's acting like a jealous jerk. You should've seen the scene he made downstairs when he saw Rick with the kids."

"Oh, well. He's going to come around, Katie. You said so yourself, he never wanted custody, they already live with you... it's going to be alright, honey. You'll see." He reached out and touched her cheek lovingly.

"I hope so, dad." She said and covered his hand with hers.

"And if this Mr. Castle is making you and my grandchildren that happy, then I like him already."

* * *

><p>"He likes you." Kate nudged Rick's side when they stepped outside the hospital that night.<p>

"Yeah, you think so?" He looked at her, uncertain, and she took his hand in hers, threading her fingers through his.

"Absolutely. You made him laugh, you make me happy and you make his grandchildren happy. You're approved, babe." She teased him with a grin and he chuckled, letting go of her hand in order to wrap an arm around her shoulders. It had gotten really cold after night had fallen.

"Well, thank God." He commented with a laugh. "I like him too. He's a fun guy, even if he's in the hospital." He placed a kiss on her head and she smiled, leaning into his side for warmth while they waited to cross the street. "And he's okay, right? I mean, the doctor said he's alright."

"Yeah, hopefully I'll be able to take him home tomorrow morning." She sighed and let him guide her across the street. "It was just a scare."

"Yeah. I'm so glad everything turned out okay. Mother and Alexis sent their love. Their words, not mine." He teased and she laughed quietly.

"Thanks. I really appreciate it. And thank _you._" She looked up at him and stopped walking, touching his arm to make him stop too. "I don't know how I would've gotten through this without you, Rick."

He smiled and touched her cheek, leaning in to capture her lips with his in a gentle kiss.

"I told you, no place I'd rather be, love." He told her, caressing her cheek lovingly.

She closed the distance between them and kissed him again, allowing herself to get lost in him for a moment. Before they got too carried away, her phone started to ring. She fished it out of her coat pocket and frowned when she saw who the caller was.

"It's Jake." She told Rick, concern and fear in her voice. "Hello?"

"Mom?" She heard her daughter's voice and her heart skipped a beat. Something was wrong. She could feel it.

"Liv, hi. What's wrong, baby?" She asked immediately and heard her daughter sigh.

"Mom..."

"I want to talk to mommy!" She heard her little boy's voice in the background.

"Shush, Alex. We don't want daddy to hear us, remember?" Olivia said and Kate felt like she couldn't breathe. What had that bastard done? "Mom, we want to go home. Please."

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Thank you so, so much for your wonderful feedback. You guys are the best! Those of you who have told me you've read all the chapters in one sitting... you have no idea how happy that makes me. Really, thank you.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 15<strong>

Kate tried to get her racing heart and haggard breathing under control while Rick drove them to Jake's apartment. After Olivia's phone call, they had run back into the hospital across the street to let her father know that she was going to go pick up her kids at Jake's and that they probably would only come back in the morning. Her father told her not to worry about him; he was just fine and that she should worry about her children.

And that would become a problem now because she couldn't trust Jake with Alex and Olivia anymore. Not if her daughter was calling her twelve hours he had taken them to beg her to come home. She wasn't sure what had happened, but a series of worst case scenarios kept running in front of her eyes and she just couldn't control them. Couldn't wish them away until she had both her children safe in her arms and away from their father.

"Hey," she heard Rick's voice break through the fogginess of her brain as he took hold of her hand. "Whatever it is, we're going to get through it." He brought her hand to his lips for a reassuring kiss. "Together. I promise."

She nodded, unable to get the words out when the knot in her throat and the overwhelming need to cry were in the way. Looking out the window, she brushed a lone tear away with the back of her hand and took a deep, shaky breath.

What the hell had he done? No matter what he had against her, or however much he might hate her, Alex and Olivia were still his children too. So if he had done anything to harm them in any way, it was completely unacceptable.

Rick parked the car about a block away from Jake's building and she all but ran the rest of the way there. Nodding to the doorman in greeting, she quickly made her way to the elevators, pressing the button frantically as if that would make the car come down faster. Rick touched the small of her back in a comforting gesture, placing a soft kiss to her temple. She looked up at him and smiled, turning around to touch his cheek.

"Maybe it would be best if you waited down here." She whispered, brushing her thumb gently over his jaw. "I don't know what I'm going to find up there and I don't want to make things worse. I mean, he already made a scene when he saw you this morning."

"Of course, Kate. Don't worry about it. Do you want me to wait here or somewhere else?" He tucked the loose strand of her hair behind her ear and she leaned into his touch, trying to take some of his strength.

"There's a diner about a block away from here, heading south. Maybe you can wait there? I'll call you when I come down with them." She suggested and he nodded, leaning in to kiss her cheek, then her lips.

"If you need anything, just call and I'll come right back." He told her seriously and she nodded, just as the elevator arrived. Stepping into it, she pushed the button for the sixth floor and leaned against the back wall, taking a deep breath to calm down her nerves.

The ride seemed endless and when the doors finally opened on the sixth floor, Kate ran to the door of her old apartment at the of the corridor, trying to steel herself against what she was about to face.

* * *

><p>Knocking on the door, she held her breath when she heard footsteps. Jake soon appeared, frowning in confusion when he saw her. He only had a towel around his waist and his hair was dripping wet. Kate thought that, once upon a time, this would be exactly what she needed to see to jump him immediately, but right now all she felt was a complete repulse towards him.<p>

"What the hell are you doing here?" He hissed at her, animosity clear in his voice, before looking behind him as if to check if the kids were nearby.

"I just got a call from Olivia begging me to come and take them home. What the hell did you do to my children?" She asked angrily and pushed him out of the way, entering the apartment.

"Mom!" She heard her little girl's voice and turned towards the sound in time to see her running from her room. "Mom, we want to go home. Please." Olivia threw herself into her arms, hugging her tightly. Alex quickly followed her, wanting in on the hug too.

"See?" She turned to Jake, who was staring at the scene dumbfounded. She thought she had smelled alcohol in his breath when he opened the door, but now she was sure. There were several beer bottles scattered over the floor, near the couch. "What did you do to them?"

"Nothing!" He exclaimed defensively. "Olivia, honey, what's going on?" He tried to get closer to the girl, but she only tightened her hold around Kate's waist.

"I want to go home, dad. Now." She said quietly, but Jake shook his head.

"You are home, Olivia." He insisted, but she interrupted him.

"I want to go home. With mom. I don't live here anymore." She whispered that last part, looking down at her feet, and Kate hugged her tighter. She sounded so sad.

"Mommy, I didn't do anything wrong, I promise. I didn't do anything wrong." Alex said, holding onto her hand, looking up at her with imploring eyes and she nodded at her little boy with a smile.

"We can discuss this later, Jake. I should just take them home." Kate said tiredly.

"No, you can't take them. They are my kids too." He protested and she sighed, running a hand through her hair.

"They want to go home, Jake. I don't know what you've done, but I think the least you can do is respect their wishes now." She said and turned to Alex and Olivia. "Guys, go get your things and we'll be on our way." Kate watched as her children ran in the direction of their bedrooms and, once they were out of sight, she turned back to her ex-husband. "If I find out you laid a hand on a hair of their head or hurt them in any way, I'm going to report you. Are we clear?" She said coldly, barely repressing her anger, her hands in tight fists by her sides.

"I didn't do anything. I don't know what the hell you've been feeding them about me, but they've been total brats all day. All I did was try to educate them better." He retorted, just as coldly, glaring at her with fury.

"We're ready, mommy." Alex called out, running back into the living room. Olivia followed him closely, her backback and her brother's hanging from each of her shoulders. Kate took Alex's from her and took her children's hands in hers, directing them to the door.

"Bye, dad." Olivia said quietly when they passed by Jake and he touched her shoulder. She shied away.

"Olivia..." he said and Kate thought she could hear a hint of sadness in his voice.

"Bye, Jake." Kate said over her shoulder and led the kids to the elevator, which thankfully was still on their floor. "We'll discuss this later." She told him flatly before stepping into the car.

The ride down was made in silence. Kate knew her children and she knew they would talk when they were ready. When they reached the first floor, Olivia asked about her grandfather.

"He's doing much better, honey. We spent the day with him today and he asked a lot about you and your brother." She explained with a small smile, quickly texting Rick to let him know she was on her way.

"Oh, that's great, mom." Olivia smiled and Kate sighed in relief at seeing her daughter smiling for the first time that night. "When can we see him?"

"He's probably going home tomorrow and he's staying with us for a few days, so you'll see plenty of him." She reassured her little girl, who nodded. Alex was still quiet. "Rick is waiting for us at that diner we always go to. Do you guys want to go see him, get something to eat?"

"Yeah, absolutely." The young girl smiled again and Kate nodded before turning to Alex.

"Baby bear?" She asked and saw her son smile again.

"Yeah, I want to see Rick." He nodded enthusiastically, making Kate chuckle.

They made their way to the diner with the kids asking about their grandfather and what the doctor had said and if he was really okay. She was still reassuring them when they opened the door to the diner and her eyes found Rick sitting at a corner booth all the way in the back. Alex immediately found him as well and ran to him, climbing onto the seat to get into his arms. Kate watched as her son hugged Rick close and how her boyfriend looked at her questioningly, concern clear in his eyes.

She made her way to their booth with Olivia and waited for her daughter to scooch over on the seat to make room for her.

"Hi, Rick." The girl said with what looked like a relieved smile. "It's good to see you."

"Good to see you too, Liv. How are you guys doing?" He asked slowly, Alex still clinging to him as if his life depended on it.

"Daddy said we would never see you again." Alex said quietly and Kate felt her heart break for her kids and for this awful mess they found themselves in. "He said that we weren't allowed and that we shouldn't like you." He pulled back from Rick's arms and Kate saw a tear escape his eyes, which Rick caught with his thumb.

"Oh, honey, of course you can see Rick. That's just silly. He's your friend too, isn't he?" Kate reached across the table to touch her little boy's hand.

"That's what me and Livie told him, but he just yelled at us for it." He finally stopped trying to contain his tears and a sob escaped. Kate's chest tightened, her heart shattered for the pain her little boy was feeling.

"Liv?" She turned to her daughter and found the young girl's sad eyes watching her brother.

"He yelled at us all day, mom. And we didn't even do anything. Then he started drinking and kept asking if we wanted to come live with him and that we would live with him even if we didn't want to. Because you couldn't take care of us, because you would get a new family and you didn't care about us anymore." She said in a rush, all in one breath, the tears threatening to fall at any moment. Kate touched her cheek and caught her tears when they inevitably started falling. "And I told him it's not true, that you love us and that you'd never do that. _Ever._" She took a deep, shaky breath and held onto Kate's hand tightly. "I thought he was going to hit me when I said I wanted to live with you and that I'd always choose you."

"Oh, baby." Kate gathered her little girl in her arms and let her cry for a moment. "Liv, listen to me. I love you and your brother more than anything in the world. You guys always come first in my life. _Always_. Don't ever doubt that." She rubbed soothing circles on the girl's back. Olivia pulled away enough to look up at her, blue eyes shining with tears.

"Promise?" Her voice shook so hard that Kate had to take a deep breath in order to control her emotions.

"Cross my heart, baby." She placed a lingering kiss to her daughter's forehead, breathing her in for a moment. "Do you hear that, Alex? I love you both so much." She asked her young son, who was listening intently to their conversation, his tears still drying on his cheek. He was leaning back against Rick's chest, her boyfriend's arm securing him.

"I love you too, mommy. And I love Rick too." He declared and Kate met Rick's eyes in surprise, the shock clear in his eyes. She nodded when he looked at her questioningly.

"I love you too, Alex." He said quietly, kissing the boy's dark hair. "Both of you." He looked up at Olivia and Kate smiled when she saw her daughter smiling at him before nodding.

"Can we still see him, mommy? Please? I'll be really, really good, I promise." Alex asked imploringly.

"Of course you can, baby bear." She smiled at him as he relaxed back into Rick's chest, praying that things wouldn't get worse from here on out. "Do you guys want to eat something? Did you have dinner at your dad's?" She asked and they both shook their heads.

"Can I have a burger, mom?" Olivia asked, sounding more like herself as she brushed away her tears with the back of her hand.

"Go ahead and order, Liv." She tucked a loose strand behind her daughter's ear as Rick called the waitress over.

While her kids ordered burgers and shakes, she felt Rick take her hand over the table and give it a comforting squeeze. She smiled sadly at him and looked down at her daughter, now happily teasing her brother, as he threw a napkin at her with a laugh. Meeting Rick's eyes again, she squeezed his hand back and put her arm around Olivia, wondering what the hell she was supposed to do now.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: You guys are the best readers anyone could ask for. Thank you so much for your amazing feedback.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 16<strong>

"I miss you." Kate sighed and rolled onto her side, holding her phone close to her ear.

It had been almost a week since Rick had gone on tour and, although they talked every day, she had missed him a lot more than she'd expected. Her week had thankfully been calm and quiet after the whole incident with Jake and the kids. He had kept his distance and Kate was grateful because she just didn't have the energy to deal with him at the moment.

"I miss you too." Rick replied and she could hear him shift around in bed. It was early morning and he was thankfully coming back to New York tonight. She couldn't wait to see him. "How's your dad?"

"He's okay. Doing much better." She tried to stiffle a yawn unsuccessfully. "He went to an AA meeting yesterday, said he is going to start going to those again."

"That's good, right?"

"Yeah." She sighed again, feeling lazy and tired. "I just hope he sticks to it." She told him and smiled when he reassured her for the millionth time. "Hey, we're having a party tomorrow for Liv's birthday. Do you think you, Martha and Alexis can make it?"

"I'll definitely be there, but I'm not sure about mother and Alexis. But I'll talk to them. I'm sure they'll try to come." She heard him yawn on the other side of the line. "What do you think she'd like as a birthday present?"

"I don't know. She's been really into astronomy lately because that's what she's studying at school. She's got this science fair thing coming up and we've been working on our very own solar system." She explained with a smile. She had been trying her best to help Olivia build a small replica of the planets for her project this past week and things were looking pretty good if she said so herself.

"Oh, I know!" He said suddenly and she could hear that little boy excitement in his voice. "Have you ever taken her to the Planetarium?"

"No, and I like where this is going." She grinned and stretched her body lazily before sitting up. "Maybe we can take her tomorrow?"

"Well, yeah, but it'd have to be at night if she wants to see the planets and stuff. I used to take Alexis there when she was about Olivia's age. She loved it." He told her and she found herself nodding, even though he wasn't there.

"We're doing her party in the afternoon, so it'll probably work out. Anyway, I should go. Check on the kids." She said and heard his agreement. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Absolutely. Love you." He said and Kate felt silly for still feeling the butterflies go crazy in her stomach whenever he said he loved her.

"Love you too, Rick." She breathed and hung up before she felt any more pathetic for being this ridiculously in love with the man.

"Mom?" She turned to the door and found her daughter leaning against the doorsill, looking sleepy.

"Hey, honey. Come here." She scooched over in order to make room for the girl and smiled when Olivia immediately jumped on her bed, making herself comfortable on Kate's pillow. Laying back down, she wrapped an arm around her daughter's waist and pulled her warm body closer, placing a kiss on her nose playfully. "Morning, bug." She whispered and tickled Olivia lightly, making the girl laugh.

"Morning." She replied and turned around, hiding her face in the crook of her mom's neck.

"Everything okay, Liv?" Kate asked, a cloud of concern shadowing her mind.

"Yeah, I just..." She felt her little girl sigh and pulled away slightly to look at her. "I was just wondering if dad is coming to my birthday party tomorrow." She confessed and Kate closed her eyes, letting out a breath.

"I'm sure he will, Liv, but I'll give him a call just in case, alright?" She tried to reassure her and Olivia nodded, a sad look still lingering in her eyes. "Do you miss your dad?" Kate asked quietly and felt the girl nod against her neck, her arms reaching over to hug her mom closer.

"I miss how things used to be for us." She said quietly and Kate felt her heart ache for her daughter. "I miss when he wasn't yelling at us or fighting with you all the time."

"Oh, baby, I know. I really wish things could be different, but everything is going to work out. You'll see." She rubbed soothing circles on her back, wishing so badly that her child didn't have to suffer through this.

"I had a bad dream last night." Olivia said after a moment of silence.

"Yeah? Want to share?" Kate asked gently, combing her hair with her fingers.

"Daddy took us away. Me and Alex." She whispered and Kate felt the girl's tears on her skin. "And he said we would never see you again." Her voice came out shaky, barely above a whisper, and Kate pressed a kiss to her forehead comfortingly.

"Oh, Liv." She sighed sadly, holding her little girl close. "It was just a dream, honey."

"I know. I know it was just a bad dream." The girl tried to contain her tears, brushing them away hastily with the back of her hand. "But what if he really does that, mom? I mean, he already said that we were going to live with him no matter what."

"But that's not how it works, Liv. Don't worry, we're going to figure it out, your dad and I, okay? This is just a tough time, but we're going to get through it. I promise."

"Yeah?" Olivia looked up at her so imploringly that she had to swallow hard to contain her own tears at seeing her baby suffering.

"I promise." She repeated, placing another kiss on the girl's forehead and took a deep breath.

She could cry alone later.

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><p>Since she had promised her daughter, Kate called Jake later that day. Their conversation was tense and exhausting, but by the end of an endless five-minute phone call, Kate managed to get him to agree to come to their daughter's bithday party the next day. Just the fact that she had to convince him to see his own daughter on her birthday made her sick and she just felt confused by this man. If he didn't even want to come to a birthday party, what the hell did he want custody of the kids for, right?<p>

Deep down, she honestly thought that he was just doing this to get her to back down, to drop the idea of a divorce. If she didn't sign the papers, then it would be a win-win situation for him. He didn't get divorced - thus not tarnishing his beloved reputation, she thought, rolling her eyes - and he wouldn't have to deal with the kids.

It was ridiculous.

She had talked to Garrett Bishop, her lawyer, about what had happened the weekend before and he suggested that, if it was something that became a pattern, then maybe they could get psychologist to talk to Olivia and Alex about how they felt about this situation. It would help her case and it would be good for the kids to talk to someone, especially Olivia who had full understanding of what was going on.

The next day she woke up early. It was a Sunday and thankfully, since she had become a mom, she managed to have weekends off most of the time. Making her way to the kitchen, she started working on the pancakes for the birthday girl. Olivia loved her special pancakes and they were traditional birthday breakfast food in the Beckett family. When she was almost done, she heard footsteps and turned around to find her sleepy little boy, rubbing his eyes as he made his way into the kitchen.

"Morning, baby bear." She smiled at him and ran a hand through his messy dark hair when he leaned against her leg sleepily. "Did you sleep okay?" She asked and felt him nod against her skin.

"Today is Livie's birthday, mommy?" He asked, looking up at her and she crouched down to his level to give him a playful eskimo kiss.

"Yes, it is. She's turning nine years old today. Do you know how much that is?" She asked him and smiled when he frowned in concentration. He was learning to count and loved his numbers.

"That's almost two whole hands." He said in awe, making Kate chuckle. "That's a lot."

"She's a big girl, your sister. But you'll catch up soon, baby. Remember how old you're going to be in a few weeks?" She brushed his hair away from his eyes as his face lit up with a big smile.

"Five. A whole hand!" He showed her his hand excitedly and Kate laughed, placing a kiss on his outstretched palm.

"That's right. But today is Livie's day, right?" She said and he nodded seriously. "So we're going to make it really special for her, okay?"

"Can I help?" He asked eagerly and Kate nodded, grabbing the orange juice and pouring it into two glasses.

"Let's go wake her up." She told him conspiratoriously and scooped him up in her arms before making her way to her daughter's room.

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><p>"Grandpa!" Olivia exclaimed when she opened the door and threw herself into his arms. "I'm so glad you came." She beamed up at him and Kate smiled from across the room. Her father had stayed with them for a couple of days after he left the hospital, but had gone home on Wednesday. Now, four days later, she was sure her kids missed having their grandfather around.<p>

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, honey. Happy birthday." He hugged her close, kissing her temple, trying to balance the box he was carrying with only one arm. "I got you a present, birthday girl."

He smiled and passed the box to the girl, who was looking at it curiously. Kate met his eyes and looked at him questioningly, to which he only nodded. They had discussed this at length this past week and Kate had finally okayed it yesterday.

"Oh, my God. Grandpa?" Olivia exclaimed and looked at her grandfather excitedly.

"It's yours, Liv. If you'll accept the responsibility of taking care of her." He told her and Olivia nodded excitedly.

"I do, I do, I do." She reached into the box and slowly pulled out the little ball of fur with slightly trembling hands. "Oh, my God." She whispered to herself, running her finger gently over it. "Mom! Mom, come here, quick!" She waved Kate over and she made her way to her daughter with a smile. "Look! Grandpa got me a kitten!" She said, excitement pouring out of her. The tiny gray kitten opened her eyes sleepily, revealing beautiful green orbs. "Oh, look. Grandpa, she's so adorable! Thank you so much."

"You're very welcome, Liv." Jim smiled down at his granddaughter.

"Mom, can I keep her? Please? I'll take really good care of her, I promise. Please?" She pleaded with her mother and Kate rolled her eyes with an affectionate smile.

"Of course, honey." She ran a hand through her daughter's head and looked up at her father. "Thanks, dad." She gave him a hug and felt him place a kiss on her cheek.

"Don't mention it. She's happy, that's all that matters." He shrugged; Kate pecked him on the cheek with a smile. "But we should probably get out of the doorway because I think more people are coming." He told them and, now that she paid attention, Kate could hear voices as well. Soon enough, Rick appeared in the hallway with Martha and Alexis.

"Hi, darling." Martha greeted her enthusiastically when Kate told them to come in. "Thank you for inviting us."

"It's a pleasure, Martha." She said and quickly introduced her father to her boyfriend's mom, smiling when her dad looked a little star struck. She hugged Alexis and watched as Olivia immediately showed her new kitten to the redhead. Alex had joined his sister and was busy caressing the kitten ever so gently. Finally, it was just she and Rick. "Hi." She beamed at him, so happy to see him after an entire week apart.

"Hey, yourself." He leaned in and kissed her cheek, dangerously close to her lips, making her suck in a breath at the contact. "I missed you so much." He whispered in her ear and quickly kissed her lips.

"Right back at you." She smiled, running her hand down his arm before finding his hand. "Thanks for coming."

"Nowhere I'd rather be. Now where's the birthday girl?" He asked, looking around and found Olivia, Alexis and Alex in a corner of the living room playing with the kitten. "Well, it looks like my present won't be the coolest anymore." He commented jokingly and Kate laughed, leaning into his side.

"Yeah, my dad gave it to her. She's crazy excited about it." She told him and sighed when he wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close. She fell into his arms willingly, breathing him in. "God, I really missed you." She murmured into his neck, placing a quick, open-mouthed kiss there, smiling when he shivered.

"Tease." He gripped her waist a little tighter, pulling her flush against him for a moment.

"Rick! Livie, look, it's Rick!" They heard Alex's voice and separated just in time for the 4-year-old to jump into Rick's arms. "I missed you a lot." The boy told him, arms wrapped around his neck.

"Missed you too, buddy. How are you doing?" Rick asked, pulling away a little to look at him.

"I'm good. You?" Alex asked, playing with Rick's collar absentmindedly.

"I'm better now that I'm here with you guys." He told him and Alex relaxed into his arms, resting his head on Rick's shoulder. "Have you been taking care of your mom and your big sister? You're the man of the house." He tickled the boy, making him laugh.

"Of course!" The boy said in a 'duh' tone, making Rick chuckle. "Right, mommy?" He turned to his mom, who was watching the scene amused.

"Of course you have, baby bear." She kissed his cheek loudly, making him giggle more. "You're my big boy." She told him and frowned when she didn't get a reaction. Alex was looking at the doorway and she followed his gaze.

Jake was standing there, gripping Olivia's birthday present tightly in his hand.

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: I am so, so sorry I disappeared on you guys. I've had to focus all my time and energy on finding a new job and I had to study for this major exam (that might possibly get me a new job) these past few weeks, so I couldn't even think about writing. Also, writer's block decided to strike, so I had to battle through that too. Anyway, thank you for you continued support and I hope you guys like this one.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 17<strong>

"Jake, hi." Kate said slowly and he felt his anger kick up a notch.

He should have known. Of course his bitch of a wife would bring the goddamn wife-stealing writer into her home and let him be near his children. _Of course_. She just didn't seem to get the picture, did she? Even when he had already very specifically told his kids that they were forbidden to be anywhere near this guy ever again.

But she just had to defy him. What the hell was she thinking?

Taking a deep breath, he tried to reign in his hatred for the man and for what Kate was doing. She was just trying to get to him, provoke him to do something she could use against him later. Why couldn't she just understand that she was his goddamn wife and he was not going to let her go?

"Hi." He said coldly, against his better judgement. Because this was just too much for him. He couldn't make himself play nice in front of them.

"Why don't you go say hi to daddy, Alex?" She said and he watched as his son tightened his hold on the man's neck, refusing to leave his arms. "Alex, come on, baby bear. Say hi to your dad." Kate insisted, touching the boy's back soothingly.

His son looked at him and he thought he could see fear in his hazel eyes as he whispered his greeting and hid his face in the crook of the writer's neck.

Okay, so maybe he did overdo with the rugrats last weekend. But he'd had to try, hadn't he?

"Come on, Alex, aren't you going to give your old man a hug?" Jake tried with a light voice, but Alex just wouldn't budge.

With a sigh, he entered the apartment and passed right by his cheating wife and the writer, without even acknowledging their presence. Whatever, he could deal with the brat later. Now he needed to win back his daughter. If Olivia was on his side, she could easily sway Alex back into his team. He found her on the couch across the spacious living room, playing with a cat, apparently, and talking to a redhead teen he had never seen before. Gorgeous too. Huh. Maybe she was a sitter?

"Olivia" he managed to put a smile on his face when the young girl looked at him. "Happy birthday, sweetheart."

He waited for her reaction and was surprised to see a shadow of doubt cross his daughter's eyes. She looked down for a moment, scratching behind the tiny animal's ears, before looking back into his eyes, not even a hint of a smile in her expression.

"Thank you, dad." She nodded at him and her attention returned to the cat on her lap.

"Hey, come on. Let me give you a hug, Liv. It's your birthday." He tried to go for a light tone, but she still looked at him so seriously. Nevertheless, she stood up, handed the kitten to the redhead and dutifully let him hug her quickly. "I got you something." He handed her the wrapped box in his hand.

She accepted it and sat back down, carefully unwrapping her present. When it revealed a shining new Ipad, she smiled for the first time since he arrived.

"This is really cool, dad. Thanks." She smiled at him and he sighed in relief. Progress.

"Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend." He raised an eyebrow and Olivia nodded with a small smile.

"Oh, sure. Dad, this is my friend Alexis. Lexie, this is my dad, Jake Caldwell." She introduced quickly, setting the Ipad aside, much to his dismay, in favor of the cat.

"Nice to meet you, Alexis." He said warmly. She really was gorgeous. How old was this girl, anyway? Hopefully 18 already, he thought with a grin.

"You too, Mr. Caldwell." She nodded at him politely. "Liv, I'll be right back, alright?" She excused herself and left. Jake turned around to see where she was going and was surprised to see her talking to the writer. Interesting.

"I'm glad you came to my birthday, dad." He heard Olivia saying and tore his eyes away from the cute teen.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, kid." He placed a light kiss on her temple and had to refrain from pumping his fist in the air in victory when she relaxed against him.

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><p>"At least he didn't make a scene."<p>

Kate sighed, leaning against the kitchen door with a sigh. Rick made his way to her after pouring soda into a dozen plastic cups sitting on the kitchen island.

"Thank god for small favors, right?" He offered a smile and touched her cheek lovingly. "Maybe he realized just how badly he screwed up last weekend." Rick said with a shrug and she nodded, leaning forward until her weight rested on his body. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he pressed a kiss to her hair. "We'll get through this, Kate. Maybe this is the beginning of the end of this thing.

"I hope you're right." She leaned back just enough to look up at him. "I just want this to be over, for their sakes. She's been having nightmares this past week. I don't know what to tell her anymore, how to comfort her." She sighed and felt that wave of sadness that had been lingering this past weekend take over her. "I'm so tired of fighting, Rick. I don't want to fight with him anymore."

"I know, babe. I know." She felt his hands rubbing soothing circles on her back and relaxed into his embrace again.

"How was the tour? Did you have fun?" She asked quietly, placing a light kiss to his neck. Just being here, close to him, made her feel better.

"Yeah, it was good. I brought you guys a few things, now that you mention it." He told her and she smiled, looking up at him again.

"You didn't have to." She narrowed her eyes at him playfully and he shrugged with a grin.

"What, I was already buying stuff for Alexis and my mom. Had to bring something for the rest of the family, right?"

"What did I ever do to deserve you, huh?" She asked him teasingly, wrapping her arms around his neck to bring his lips to hers.

"Someone up there must like you very, very much." He murmured before deepening the kiss. Kate felt her lower abdomen tighten deliciously and a moan escaped her when he pressed their hips together. "I so wish we could finish this right now." He said breathlessly, trailing down a path down to her neck with his lips.

"You have no idea." She sighed, biting her lip to keep a moan in when he sucked her pulse point gently. "Later. Will you stay tonight?"

"Absolutely." He stole another kiss before letting her go. "Hey, buddy." He greeted and Kate turned around in time to see her son entering the kitchen.

"I was looking for you." The boy told Rick with a smile. "Did you see the kitten Grandpa gave Livie?"

"No, I didn't."

"Come on, I'll show you." Alex grabbed his hand and started pulling him to the door. Rick looked at Kate, who nodded, saying it was okay. "She's really cute, Rick. And she's so small too, you'll see!" The boy told him excitedly, making him chuckle. Kate watched them interact with an amused smile.

"Alex, tell your sister we're singing happy birthday soon, alright?" She called after them and the boy turned around to nod at her.

"Okay, mommy! I'm just going to show Rick the..." Kate looked up from what she was doing to see her son looking up at his father with wide eyes. Jake looked murderously at Rick.

Well, it had been too good to be true, hadn't it? It looked like he was going to make a scene after all, she thought, when he clenched his fists tightly, glaring at her boyfriend.

"Go ahead and show Rick the kitten, baby bear. I'll be there soon." She told him and nodded when Rick looked at her questioningly. Watching them leave, she returned to the task at hand - arranging the plastic cups on a tray to serve to the guests - and waited.

"You just don't learn, do you?" She heard his quiet, icy voice, right before he closed the kitchen door. "I already told you I don't want that son of a bitch anywhere near my kids." He hissed at her and Kate sighed, tiredly.

"Yeah, you very specifically told your children that. Did you know that your daughter has been having nightmares ever since you threatened to take them away from me and forbade them to see Rick?" She looked up at him with raised eyebrows. "Do you have any idea what your idiotic attitude is doing to Olivia and Alex, Jake?"

"I didn't do anything wrong. They are my children and I can say whatever I see fit to them. _I'm_ their father, not that writer guy." He exclaimed angrily and she closed her eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath.

"And no one is taking that away from you, Jake. But do you see what your actions are doing to them? Alex is afraid of you because you spent all day last weekend yelling at him. Is that really what you want? Do you want them to be afraid of you?" She asked calmly, running a hand through her hair. "Because you have succeeded."

"I just can't accept that guy around them." He said, a little quieter, but the anger still evident in his tone.

"Well, you have to accept that Rick is a part of my life now." She shrugged and almost regretted saying it when he saw his face flushing, a vein pulsing angrily on his temple. "Keeping the kids from seeing him is not really an option. I love him and so do Alex and Olivia and you'll just..."

The blow came without warning. Kate just felt the impact of his hand on her cheek and it took a few seconds for the searing pain to register in her brain. A few seconds that she felt like time had stopped as she watched, stunned, as Jake breathed hard in front of her, hatred evident in his eyes.

"Get out." She hissed, bringing a hand to her cheek, as she tried to breathe through the pain.

"Kate..." He started, seeming to realized what he had just done.

"Get the hell out of my apartment." She said, louder this time, and he seemed to listen because he turned on his heels to hightail out of her kitchen. He stopped in his tracks, though, making her see red. "Jake, _get out_!" She yelled and finally saw what had made him freeze.

Olivia was standing at the door, fresh tears escaping her eyes.

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><p><strong>AN: Please don't kill me.**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: You guys are amazing. I am still completely overwhelmed by your response to this story. Really. Thank you so much. This chapter was supposed to be a lot longer originally, but it's late and I need sleep, so I decided to break it in half. Hope you guys like it.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 18<strong>

"Mom..." Olivia breathed, her voice shaking so hard that all Kate wanted to do at that moment was to get to her child.

Jake seemed to snap out of his daze after seeing his daughter, and pushed past Olivia to flee the apartment. Kate took a deep breath and touched her cheek gently, trying to assess the damage. The pain was spreading from the point of impact on her right cheek to the rest of her face and her head was pounding.

"Rick!" She heard Olivia call out, fear so evident it her young voice, as Kate felt something wet on her cheek. Bringing her hand up in front of her, she gasped at the sight of blood on her fingers. "Rick, help!"

_That son of a bitch._

"What's wrong, Liv?" Rick's voice registered in her brain and she looked up, eyes meeting his across the kitchen. "Oh, God. Kate." He crossed the distance between them and reached out to her, shocked. "Jake did this?" He breathed, still stunned. Kate nodded. "Jesus, Kate. We have to get you to a hospital."

"Dad hit her. I saw it, Rick. I saw it. He hit my mom!" Olivia said through her tears and Kate reached out to her daughter, touching her cheek gently.

"Honey, go outside and get your grandpa and Uncle Javi, alright?" She said as calmly as she possibly could, so not to scare her daughter even more. "Hey, Liv, look at me. I'm going to be just fine, okay?"

"But you're bleeding, mom!" Olivia exclaimed, brushing her tears away with the back of her hand, only for fresh ones to take their place. Rick touched her shoulder, making her look up at him

"Liv, hey. Go get your grandpa, okay? I'll take care of your mom, don't worry." He told her and she nodded, running off to the living room. The moment she was out of ear-shot, Rick turned to Kate. "I'm going to kill that son of a bitch."

"Get in line." Kate retorted through gritted teeth, opening the fridge to get some frozen peas. "I can't believe he did this." She shook her head, wincing when it caused the pain in her cheek to kick up a notch. "God." She tried to swallow hard through the knot in her throat, but a traitorous tear escaped her eyes, despite her efforts to keep it together.

"Oh, babe." Rick pulled her to him gently, wrapping his arms around her for a moment. Taking the bag of frozen peas from her hands, he put it on the sink. "Let me take a look." He touched her cheek carefully, on her good side, and angled her face so he could take a better look at her quickly swelling cheek. "We need to get you to a hospital, Kate. How bad does it hurt?"

"Bad." She sighed, brushing a tear away. "But I don't think there is a fracture. It doesn't feel broken."

"Katie?" She turned around in time to see her father entering the kitchen. He gasped in surprise when he saw her bruised cheek. "Oh, my God, Katie. What happened to you?"

"Jake happened." She said angrily, frustrated when yet another tear made its way down her cheek. "What I need to do right now is go down to the station and report his ass. He wanted a fight. Now he's got one."

"You need to get this checked out first, Kate. I know you're angry, but you need to take care of yourself first." Rick tried to reason with her, but she shook her head with a grimace.

"Rick is right, honey. You can give your statement at the hospital. Isn't that how these things work? If you tell them it was assault?" Her father told her and she sighed.

"Beckett? Olivia said you needed help... whoa!" Esposito stopped in his tracks when he saw her. "What the hell happened?!"

"Javi, I need to report Jake for third degree assault. Can you come with me to the station?"

"That scumbag did this to you? _I'm going to fucking kill him._" He exclaimed angrily.

"Javi, focus. I need to get to the station and report this. _Then _I can go to the hospital." She added, turning to her father and Rick before they could protest. "They need to see this and take pictures. I'm going to nail his ass for this." She hissed, touching her cheek gently again. It already felt swollen and incredibly tender. At least the bleeding seemed to had stopped.

"Mommy?" She heard Olivia's voice and found her daughter at the door, looking scared and unsure. "Mom, are you okay?" Kate closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to pull herself together.

"Liv, honey, I'm going to go with Rick and Uncle Javi to get this taken care of, okay?" she went to her little girl and pulled her into a hug. "Dad, can you stay with them for me? Send everyone else home?"

"Of course, Katie. Don't worry about it." Her father reassured her and she nodded, turning back to Olivia.

"See? Grandpa is going to stay with you and your brother and I'll be back really soon." She pressed her lips gently to her daughter's hair, trying to comfort her somehow.

"But I want to go with you." Olivia said in a small voice, holding onto her tighter. "What if he comes back? I want to stay with you, mom!" She insisted, but Kate shook her head.

"Hey, I'll be as fast as I can, alright? You don't have to worry about me, honey. I'll be just fine." She reassured the young girl, who nodded reluctantly and accepted the hand her grandfather offered her.

"Let's go get your brother, sweetheart." Jim said and Olivia nodded before following him out to the living room. Once they were out of the kitchen, Kate turned to Rick and Esposito.

"Let's go." She took a deep breath, trying to get her emotions under control. "Rick, can you run to my room and get my purse? My wallet and everything I need is in there."

Rick nodded and filed out of the kitchen in a hurry. When he was gone, Kate sagged against the kitchen island and closed her eyes, brushing a stray tear away with her thumb. She felt her partner approach her, and opened her eyes when he touched her shoulder.

"We're going to get him, Kate. I promise you that." He told her earnestly and she nodded. "He's going to have a nice notch on his brand new criminal record now and I'll make sure he sits in the tank for a while."

"Thanks, Javi." She whispered, biting down on her bottom lip to keep from crying. "I just can't believe he did this, you know?"

"I know, chica. I know." He sighed heavily. "But let's focus on the bright side. He's just ruined any chance he possibly had of getting custody of the little ones. An arrest for assault and battery against his ex-wife? That'll do some nice damage to his career as well."

Kate gave him a wry smile.

"Every cloud has a silver lining and all that, right?" She chuckled and he nodded with a grin.

"That's my girl." He nudged her shoulder gently and nodded at Rick when he entered the kitchen with Kate's purse and jacket. "Come on. Let's get this over with."

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><p>The process of giving her statement and letting them take pictures of the damage Jake had done to her face was gruelling and more than a little humiliating. Kate felt like crying the entire time and only the fact that this was where she worked made her keep her tears at bay and her emotions under control as best as she could. Rick and Esposito never left her side and she couldn't be any more grateful to them than she was at that moment.<p>

Once she was released, Rick drove her to the hospital while her partner stayed behind to follow up on her case and get an arrest warrant out for Jake. At the hospital, the doctor examined her cheek and ordered an x-ray to look for any fractures on her cheek bone. Her cheek was swollen and a red and purple bruise spread from the point of impact out. They desinfected the cut and, thankfully, she didn't need any stitches.

"How are you feeling?" Rick asked quietly while they waited for the x-ray results. She turned to look at him from her half-seated position in the gurney and sighed.

"Pissed off. Humiliated. In pain. You name it." She admitted and he took her hand, bringing it up to his lips for a comforting kiss. "I never thought he'd do something like this. Never thought he'd cross that line and it just makes me feel so... angry and betrayed... I never want to see him again, Rick. _Ever_."

"We'll make sure he pays for this, Kate. I promise." He pressed his lips to the back of her hand again and she smiled, reaching out with her free hand to run her fingers through his hair. "At least it's like Javi said, right? He doesn't stand a chance in getting custody now. So at least that part will be over."

"I hope so. I really do." She let out a heavy sigh and squeezed his hand. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being here. Being you. Loving me." She brought his hand to her good cheek and leaned into his touch, taking comfort in the warmth emanating from him.

"I should've protected you. Shouldn't have left you alone with him." He looked so guilty that she felt even worse. "He only did this to you because of me."

"None of this is your fault. Don't even think that." She covered his hand with hers. "Jake is being a sore loser. He doesn't love me, I doubt he even likes me anymore. He's cheated on me for years and now that we're separated he wants to play the married card. So don't even think about feeling guilty, Rick. Okay?" She searched his eyes, but he sighed and looked down. " Hey, look at me." She reached out and touched his chin, making him meet her eyes again. "I love you. You're the best thing that's happened to me in a really long time, Rick. I don't regret this or you. Not even for a second."

"I'm going to kill him if he ever touches you again." He murmured, pressing a kiss to her palm. "I'm not going to let him hurt you ever again, love. I promise."

"Ms. Beckett?" The doctor's voice interrupted their conversation and both turned to look at the young woman who had just pulled the curtain around her gurney away. "Hi, we got your results back."

"Does she have a fracture?" Rick asked, holding onto Kate's hand.

"I'm afraid so." She took the x-ray and put it up on the white board, turning it on so they could see it. "See this line here? That's your fracture. You got lucky, though. It's very, very minor, so you can easily treat this at home." Dr. Browns told them and Kate nodded. "I'll prescribe some pain medication and some anti-inflammatories for the soft tissue injury. Apply lots of ice on it and the swelling should go down in a few days."

"Thank you, Dr. Browns." Kate said when the young woman handed her the prescription and her discharge papers.

"No problem, Ms. Beckett. I hope everything works out for you." She said sincerely and Kate nodded with a grateful smile.

Rick helped her out of the gurney and wrapped an arm around her waist for support. Kate leaned against him and kissed his cheek gently before pulling him towards the exit.

"Let's go home."

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><p><strong>AN: Thoughts?**


	19. AUTHOR'S NOTE

**A/N: **

**I know, I know. I have been MIA for entirely too long. I am so sorry. You guys have no idea how bad I feel right now. Really. But - I am not sure you'll remember - I posted an author's note about how I had been studying for this exam I had to take for a new job. Well, the thing is, I passed and I am in training right now and the hours are grueling. ****_I literally don't have time to write_****. I barely have time to sleep or do anything not related to training. Things will probably slow down in a about a month, but for now my life has been pretty hectic.**

**Again, I apologize and I hope you'll still want to read it when I get back to it.**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: I am so so so sorry at how ridiculously long it took for me to update. Life really got in the way. I hope you're still interested. Let me know?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Castle. Obviously.**

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><p><strong>At the end of the tunnel<strong>

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><p><strong>Chapter 19<strong>

"Mommy!"

Kate felt the impact of her little boy on her legs as soon as she walked through the front door. Alex looked up at her with wide eyes, fear evident in his expression as he took in her swollen cheek and the bruise that covered it. Brushing his hair away from his eyes, she tried to smile reassuringly at him before painfully reaching down to pull him into her arms.

"Hey, baby bear." She kissed his nose gently and sighed sadly when he still didn't relax.

"You're hurt." He whispered simply, reaching out to touch her bruised cheek lightly, almost as if he was afraid she was going to break right in front of his eyes. "Livie says daddy hurt you." His bottom lip stuck out, trembling. "Why did he do that?"

Kate had to take a deep breath to keep the tears at bay, the knot in her throat closing up so tight that she felt like she would suffocate any second. The door closed behind her and she felt Rick's hand touch the small of her back comfortingly, as he caught Alex's attention for a moment.

"Hey, buddy." He ruffled his hair gently and offered his arms as she looked at him gratefully. The effort of holding her son was a little more than she could handle right now. After everything that happened, adrenaline seemed to finally be leaving her veins and her entire body hurt. "You gotta be careful with your mom, alright? So she'll heal faster." Rick said quietly, as she transferred the boy into his arms.

"But why did daddy hurt her? I don't get it." Alex talked quietly, as if he was afraid that anything louder would hurt her more.

"Katie" Her father interrupted the boy before he could ask any more questions that she still didn't know how to answer. "Honey, we made dinner. And there's cake."

Jim wrapped an arm around her shoulders and guided her further into the living room, in the kitchen's direction. Kate felt like she was slowly going numb, her thoughts seemed slow and foggy. Maybe it was the shock of seeing Alex's fear and the adrenaline of the events wearing off. Whatever it was, she needed to shake it off fast, put on a brave façade in front of her children.

"Thanks, dad." She told her father quietly, once they had entered the kitchen. "How are they? Where is Olivia?"

"They're as okay as can be expected, honey." He touched her chin, so he could look more closely at the damage Jake had done. "Olivia cried a lot after you left, but Alex and the new kitten managed to distract her. She fell asleep a little while ago." He sighed, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. "Alex was just confused."

"I still can't believe he did this, dad." She let out a shaky breath and averted her eyes. It seemed that every time she found herself relaxing even a little bit, the overwhelming need to cry tried to take over her. "And in front of Olivia. On her birthday. _God_."

"If he ever shows his face here again, I can't be held responsible for my actions, Katie." She looked up at the anger in his tone and took his hand, giving it a grateful squeeze. "I hope you guys catch him and lock him up for what he did to my little girl. Because right now I really, really want to kill him."

"We'll catch him, dad. We've got an arrest warrant out for him already. It's just a matter of time." She sighed heavily and leaned against the counter as he poured her some tea. "I just want this to be over."

She felt so humiliated and powerless. Even though she knew they had taken all the necessary measures against him, she still felt like a scared little girl, as hard as she tried to feel otherwise. The man she had once loved so much had turned on her physically, in front of their daughter, no less… it was too much. On top of everything that was going on, this was the final straw for her and she was holding so tightly to the last shred of strength she had to keep it together.

Esposito had gotten an arrest warrant out for Jake and had alerted everyone to keep an eye out to catch him. When they did catch him – and she hoped it wouldn't take too long; she couldn't stand the thought of him out there where he could still hurt them – he would have to pay some very good money to bail himself out. The only comforting thought through this whole mess was that he would have absolutely no chance at getting custody of Alex and Olivia now, so she figured that at least this part of the nightmare was over.

"Mommy, me and Rick want some cake. Can we have some, please?"

She snapped out of her reverie when she heard her son's voice and smiled, relieved, when she saw him dragging Rick into the kitchen by the hand, while he held his sister's kitten carefully with the other. He already seemed to be back to his normal self, albeit still a little shaken when he focused on the huge hematoma on her cheek. Jake had really done a number on her.

"Of course, baby." She told him and ran her fingers gently through his brown hair when he leaned against her leg. Looking up at Rick, she found him watching her with a touch of concern. "Can you get it for him?" She asked, reaching out for his hand for a quick, comforting squeeze.

"Sure. You okay?" He asked quietly and she nodded, threading her fingers through his. He leaned in for a quick kiss, apparently very aware that her father was standing just a few feet away, and turned back to her boy. "Alright, Mr. Alex, ready for some awesome birthday cake? I hear it's filled with chocolaty goodness." He told the boy conspiratorially, making Alex giggle delightedly.

"Yes!" The boy exclaimed happily while Rick cut a small piece and put it on a plastic plate for him.

"You should put the kitten down first, buddy." Kate warned amused and took the little ball of fur from her son's hands, before setting it down on the floor. The kitten was so small that it fit right into her palm. "Did you guys name her?" She asked the boy as he dug right into the chocolate.

God, they so shouldn't be feeding him sugar right now.

Rick sat across from him at the table, cutting another three pieces of cake for himself, Kate and her father.

"No, Livie said she couldn't choose a name just yet." Alex explained, smearing chocolate over his lips with his enthusiasm. "She didn't even want her cake, mommy." He told her and Kate was startled at his sudden mood change. His eyes looked so sad all over again and he played with the cake on his plate for a moment. "She said that daddy did something very bad."

Kate took a deep breath and knelt down to his height, brushing her lips gently over his hair.

"He did, baby. But he won't do it again. Ever." She reassured him, biting her lip to keep it together when she saw tears well up in his eyes.

"But what if he does it again, mommy? What if he hurts Livie and me next? You shouldn't hurt people, right? It's very, very bad to hurt people, you always say." He said in one breath and Kate touched his chin, making him look at her.

"He won't hurt you, Alex. Or your sister. I will never, ever let anything happen to you, baby." She told him seriously and looked at Rick for reassurance for a second, before turning back to her son. "We will always protect you. Rick, Grandpa, Uncle Javi, Uncle Kevin. Nothing is going to happen to you guys."

"Promise?" He asked in such a small voice, a tear finally making its way down his cheek, that she pulled him into her arms and hugged him close.

"Oh, I promise, baby. Cross my heart." She whispered, rubbing soothing circles on his back, her eyes searching out Rick and her father. They nodded at her, her father making his way over to wrap her in his arms.

She let out a heavy sigh, a stubborn tear escaping her eyes at the sad mess her life had become.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Thoughts? Anyone still out there?**


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